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I woke up as an Ancient Slab, what is the Meaning of This!?

Evan Myers was an ordinary, everyday college student, he was boring as hell, but one day while he was power napping, instead of waking up on his apartment couch, he woke up in a pure white room with a spin wheel like in those game shows, [ what the hell ] he thought, but he spun the wheel anyways, he got option 7, [ hell yeah my lucky number is 7! ] , little does he knows that option 7 means he will reincarnate as a Slab. Follow his stupid adventure as he tries to gain a mortal human body and maybe slay the Demon King? Nah, he probably won't slay the Demon King.. Fair warning : This story does not take itself seriously. If you like a more serious, intense storyline, then this might NOT be your cup of tea. It's like the difference between an epic waterslide and a lazy river. This story being categorized as the latter. Also, this is positively isekai T R A S H. Also also, the whole thing is a m e s s, but do I care about it? Of course! It keeps me up at night :)

Dheafarccane · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
31 Chs

Chapter 15

" Oy, kid! You must've regretted turning my offer down, huh? Now you're surrounded! Give us all of your valuables! ". The man, Roy, said.

We're a little far away from the main street, so there's not a lot of people here, that means there's not a lot of unnecessary witnesses, so nobody is going to notice why these bunch of idiots went missing. That's good to know.

" If you're going to be a good boy, we'll do our best to not hurt you.. Not too much.. Maybe a little. ". Roy said.

" Is that so? Well, the only valuable item I have on me which you're gonna catch are... These hands! ".

As soon as I said that, I immediately lowered my posture and rushed towards that Roy bastard.

" Wha-! ".

Once I got close enough, I sent an uppercut towards his chin, sending him flying backwards while knocking a few of his teeth out. That felt great. He then landed on his ass with a thud.

" Uughh.. What are you idiots doing?! Go get 'im! ". He yelled at his cronies.

The gang immediately rushed towards me while yelling profanities, I grinned at the thought of finally utilizing the skills that Alyssia taught me. There were 6 people, not including the head honcho Roy. One guy was swinging his sword down towards me, I deflected the trajectory using my hands then I grappled his arms and broke his elbows, his screams of agony were music to my ears. He won't be fighting anytime soon.

I felt someone behind me, so I ducked down just as he was swinging his club sideways and avoided it, I responded by throwing him off his feet by swiping them off the ground. He fell with an idiotic "oof", then I proceeded to stomp on his exposed neck, taking him out instantly.

I elbowed another guy on his solar plexus, making him keel over, unconscious. Weak. It seems like they have a mage on their side, the mage was chanting something, so I rushed over to him and snapped his neck, he fell on to the floor with a gurgle, lifeless.

" Shit! You guys are useless! ". Roy yelled.

I finished off the last two remaining guys, by punching one on his stomach, and giving the final one a German suplex, he smacked his head hard on the stone paved road, I think he's dead.

I slowly approached Roy, he was trying to get away from me, but it seems he's frozen with fear, I used a special << Intimidation >> skill taught to me by Maxim, it was super effective! He was pissing himself and stuff, super disgusting.

" Please! Wait! W-.. Wait! I'll give you anything! Really! Spare me! Please! ". He pleaded.

" You said I'll regret my choice, huh? But, I'm not regretting anything at all, in fact, this is quite the entertainment you're providing me! ". I said, with the << Intimidation >> skill. He was scared out of his mind as his skin went snow pale.

He tried to crawl away, but I stepped down hard on the back of his knee, and stopped him.

" Now where are you going? You can't escape, you know? ".

" Hiiii! What do you want?! ". He screamed.

I grabbed him by the back of his collar, and then I threw him on a curb nearby, positioning my foot above his head.

" I want... Your screams. ".

As I said that, I gave the bastard a good curb stomp, he died after a couple of times, what a weakling, didn't even scream enough. After that, I made sure that all of the guys that attacked me was finished, so I snapped all of their necks.

I left the scene immediately, leaving the mess for whoever discovers that next. Like what I do when I close the fridge door too hard and something fell inside.

Leaving the alleyway, I didn't sense anyone else following, so that's good. As nobody is around, there's little chance that someone will find the bodies, I then checked the time from my wrist watch, given to me as a gift from Mr. Markus, it was 11:07, getting kinda late, I hurried up my pace towards the training hall.

After a while of power walking, I arrived at the location. It looks like a warehouse from the outside, but, what differs it from the regular warehouses in the area was a sign that said "Public Training Hall" and the Guild's insignia on the outside. There's not only Adventurers here, but also regular people, and soldiers too. It seems that the soldiers and regular people has to pay to access the Hall though, while Adventurers don't have to. It's like a gym.

So I showed my Guild Card and the piece of paper that Mike gave me to a staff member, he said.

" You're here for the test, correct? ".

" Yes, is it inside? ". I answered.

" It just started, you're right on time, here's your call number, it'll be your turn when the number on the paper you're holding on is called, go on inside. ". He explained, while giving me a ticket with the number "14" on it, and then handing back my Card. It seems my turn is 14.

Inside, the temperature was kept at a comfortable 22⁰ Celsius, probably through magic. There were training equipment, such as a sandbag, a training dummy, a training dummy with blades, an obstacle course, three areas that looks like fighting rings, protected by a barrier magic, and there are the more traditional weight training equipment and such. The Training Hall was surprisingly spacious and clean, there was even a public bathing area, separated for men and women, of course.

At the center of the Hall, there was a particularly large fighting ring, two people were currently sparring on it. One guy was a young man, a little taller than my current body, and a bit more well built, with tanned skin, and with brown hair and eyes, he has animalistic ears and a tail. The other guy was a man probably in his mid thirties, with dark green hair and green eyes. He was a head taller than the young man he was facing, he's probably the examiner, as he was holding off the young man's attacks with ease, while holding him back. After a while of fighting, a referee decided to end the match and decided what rank the newcomer will start at when they start their career. The next person was called by the examiner.

" Turn number 6! Where are you?! ". He said.

" Here! I'm coming! ". Another young man said, his hair was fiery red in color, which is rare here, even more rare than my black hair.

I decided to wait by sitting on a provided bench, then, someone else also sat down beside me, asking.

" Umm.. Excuse me, but, what turn is this? ". A person asked, it was a girl, with long, pointy ears, characteristics of elves. Her hair was light green and is braided, and her eyes was a warm amber yellow in color. She has a well featured face and a small, slender build, also a characteristic of elves. She stared at me for a while, waiting for my answer.

" The guy currently fighting there is turn number 6, what turn are you? ". I asked.

" Oh thank god, my turn number is 13. ". She said, so right before my turn, huh?

" I see. ".

" Ah, yes, my name is Melania Evergreen, call me Mel. Nice to meet you. ".

" I'm Evan, nice to meet you too. ". She seemed a little surprised upon hearing my name. She probably thought I was a girl or something.

" Are you someone from the eastern hemisphere? Your black hair is quite rare. ". She asked.

" Something like that, that guy's red hair is way more rare though. ". I said, pointing at the fighting ring.

" Yeah, dragon kin like him are really rare to come by. ". She commented, it seems that guy over there is a "dragon kin". Fascinating. No wonder I thought that there's small scales around his forearms for a second.

" Also, why are you registering as an Adventurer, Evan? ". She asked.

" No particular reason, just want a job to help kill time and make money from. ". I said.

" So you have another job? ".

" Yeah, I do. ".

" I see. Well, let's do our best together! ". She said, she's really energetic.

She started a wild, random, one-sided conversation where she was the only one speaking and I was just nodding periodically while non-committally saying "yeah" and "is that so?" and "mhm". Her "conversation" didn't seem to be ending anytime soon. But then, she was snapped back to reality because her turn number was called.

" Oh, that's my turn. Well then, let's meet again sometime! Bye! Wish me luck! ". She said, although she was a little timid at first, once she gets a little familiar, she acts like she has known me since we were kids. A peculiar personality, for sure.

She came up on the ring, and greeted the examiner, the examiner seems to be underestimating her, much to her displeasure, she was wielding a short, dulled dagger in her hand, when the referee signaled for the exam to start, Mel immediately launched into the examiner, as if being sucked in by gravity. The examiner, caught off guard, quickly intercepted her attack, he managed to completely stop Mel's advance on him, but, she wasn't over yet, she darted off side to side, throwing off the examiner's focus on her, while periodically striking him. She's really skilled, I wonder if she would want to team up with Luke and I, because she'll be a perfect middle guard, I already envisioned how a team of me, Luke, and Mel would work. Luke will be the vanguard, holding off attacks, while Mel can deal the majority of the damage, while I act as rear or middle guard, supporting as necessary. But I digress.

While I daydreamed about that, Mel was putting pressure on the examiner, that's when the referee decided it'll be enough, and the examiner gave a passing score to Mel, she will start as an E-ranked Adventurer. The highest rank a newbie Adventurer can achieve right after examination. A 15 minute break was announced, so I continued to think about random stuff. But, that was interrupted by Mel coming up to me, saying.

" Did you see that? Did you see that? Did I do good? ". She asked, giddy.

" I did see that, yes. Great job. ".

" Hehehe, when's your turn, by the way? ".

" Right after this break. Why don't you go ahead and rest up? ".

" Yeah, I should probably freshen myself, well, see you around! ". She said, heading off to the public baths available.

After 15 minutes, the examiner shouted " Turn number 14! Where are you?! ".

" I'm here! ". I answered loudly.

Well, guess it's my turn, then. Let's hope this doesn't go south immediately.

====[ Author's Note ]====

Can this be categorized as a tournament arc?

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Please be informed that this is a Fictional work and any and all resemblance to a real Person or Place or Things or Ideas are purely coincidental and know that this humble author means no harm.

And remember kids! Piracy is Frowned Upon! So don't steal stuff unless you want to be turned into a coffee table made of your own flesh and bones!

I unironically, officially have minor brain damage.

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