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HP: The Big Bad Wolf

Bailed, gives a lazy guy a few wishes and sees how it works out. That is all that is required to comprehend the story if one wishes to engage in its reading. Picture is an AI art done by 3D1viner on DeviantArt. If the dude complains, I will change the picture!

Ikaru5 · Book&Literature
Not enough ratings
33 Chs

Chapter 16: Go fuck yourself you wannabe Gandalf!! Part 2

[Part 2: Politics are everywhere in our lives.]

"Mr. Snape, I must insist that you come with me to my office," Gandalf said in a no-nonsense tone.

Seems like the man has decided to wear his big boy panties today and come for what is not his.

"Well, if you must insist, sir, then I have to follow and see what it is that you wish to discuss," I say in a defeated tone. But then I smirk like a bitch who has derangedly decided to accuse her boyfriend, on whom she has cheated, of being her child's father.

"Why you smmirking like that, Snivellus?!" Black asks me, and I ignore the sad heap of shit that passes as a human being.

"But, Headmaster, as it is common procedure, I wish for my head of house to be present! Surely, there is nothing that I have done of which we need to make a secret, right?" I say with a shit-eating grin.

I know what the old bastard wants from me, but why should I hand it over to him? I am a student here at Hogwarts, and as such, almost all matters concerning me fall firstly to my head of house, followed by the Headmaster, before finally reaching my legal guardian.

And here's the funny part: over the years, this old goatfucker has abused the system as leniently as he wished because who would dare to stand up to him?! He is Dumbledore, the Archmage who beat the Dark Lord Grindelwald, the Supreme Mugwump, the guy with too many titles shoved up his ass that makes him think he is actually the one running the show.

He does not consider what a child wants, well, unless there's an actual prophecy involved then he suddenly gets a hard-on for child care, well, he sucks at that job too just as he does at being a headmaster!

'The safest place on earth-my ass it is!' I curse in my mind, whenever I have to see that big ass monstrosity of a snake slithering around on my map!

What the protector and defeater of Dark Lords has to consider is the greater good of everyone, aka the greater good of those who pledge themselves to his dream and become willingly his sacrificial lambs.

"I don't think it is necessary for Professor Slughorn to join us…," he tries to deflect, but not this time.

"I do think it is necessary!" I put my foot down.

"You don't even trust Headmaster Dumbledore?!" Pettigrew throws out with his noisy voice, grating on my nerves.

"If you want the facts laid out, Pettigrew! No, I do not! I do not trust anyone inside this school concerning my legal rights! And least of them all is the headmaster, who has all too often played me for a fool!" I say to the fat bastard with a smile, knowing his future, and all the regrets and remorse that will plague him and his friends due to his selfish actions.

The Marauders, I think while smiling, how fitting the name actually is.

'A marauder is someone who roams from place to place, making attacks and raids in search of plunder. The only kind of trust between thieves, is trusting in the fact that they'll backstab one another.' I think amused at the ironic name.

'And these morons have chosen this name for themselves, how ironic indeed,' I contemplate with an odd sense of satisfaction.

"I am sorry to hear that, Mr. Snape. But know that I have always had your best interest at heart," Gandalf says with a hurt expression.

"Please, Headmaster, don't take it to heart! It's all basic politics to you after all," I reply to his pretty great acting skills.

How dumb would I have been if I had not met my other self and merged with him? First, willingly enslaving myself into a lunatic's services, and then upon realizing he is a madman, I jump into Gaydore's loins for help! Getting myself fucked and screwed like some cheap whore by everyone around, and in the end, I get absolutely nothing!

Potter fucks the girl I am crushing on! Said girl throws me away for status and wealth by marrying the boy that is my bully! And all my sugar daddies and so-called friends use me like some pocket pussy, only to throw me away once they're done with me. And the cherry on top of everything is that I have to remain inside this smelly old ass castle teaching children a class that is way above their understanding, a class these fools cannot even cherish.

"My boy, that is not true," Gandalf says.

"Snivellus! Just because you are a manipulative little bitch does not mean you get to denounce the headmaster!" Black says angrily.

'Well, I have insulted his idol after all.' I shrug mentally at his outrage.

"Professor Dumbledore has defeated Grindelwald! He is not someone who bows to politics; otherwise, he would not have stood up to the Dark Lord! He is a man standing up for justice." Potter says, full of justified indignation.

*Sigh*

'I can tell them that their beloved Headmaster has been on his knees in front of Grindelwald, blowing his mighty Grindel-Stick, maybe also tell them that the man had his back blown by the mighty Dark Lord's mighty meat stick. Or maybe tell Potter how he is thrown away for the sake of a prophecy by the man, or how his son is manipulated and deceived for decades by him, all for the sake of the greater GOOD. But all that would achieve is to merely amuse me and make Gaylore my enemy,"'I contemplate to myself.

"Whatever you say, doggo. I will only walk into that office after the last debacle I experienced in there if either my head of house or my legal guardian is present!" I declare, ending the farce once and for all.

Just as I am about to turn around and leave, I see the old man smiling, and I know he thinks that I have messed up, but I know that I did not.

'Come on, Gaylore, jump into the hole I have dug for your old wrinkly arse!' I think to myself, full of schadenfreude.

"Mr. Snape, I think inviting your guardian in would not be all that much of a problem." the old man says happily.

"But Headmaster..." Black says shocked.

"Sirius, shut up!" Potter says while grinning like a bitch that is a crack head and is about top get another nose full.

'So the morons have a central brain around whom they gather?!' I muse as I see the scene playing out in front of me.

'I thought Black was just in it for his hate, but now I can see Potter actually pulling the strings somewhat from behind the scene,' I muse silently.

"Great. I will write him a letter, informing him that I wish to see him, and will be visiting your office as soon as his reply arrives," I say with a mock annoyed expression.

Had Gaylore waited just a few days before going in for the attack, he might have known that I am now a member of House Prince. But because he wants his petty revenge for the Werewolf debacle, he misplayed his hand.

"I assume your house is connected to the Floo Network?" Gaylore asks me.

"It is." I reply dryly.

"Then there is no need to wait, just call him over!" He says happily.

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