A Little Song and Dance

The doors opened immediately, showing a familiar face to the twins.

"The firs' years Professor McGonagall." Hagrid said, giving a small nod.

"Thank you, Hagrid. I will take them from here." She said and let them through the door. She then lead them across flagged stone floors to a door that had voices coming out from behind it. They didn't stop there, much to everyone's surprise, and instead went to a smaller chamber that was connected to the hall.

The Professor turned around and addressed the crowd of students, "Welcome to Hogwarts, The start of term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your Houses. The sorting ceremony is a very important ceremony because while you are here, your House will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will take classes with the rest of the House first years, sleep in the House dormitory, and can spend free time with the rest of your House in the House common room."

After the first part of the speech the twins tuned out as they had heard all of this from their uncle. When she finished, the twins had caught her eye, and she then nodded, which the twins returned before she walked out of the room.

When she left, there was a small explosion of chatter as people speculated what was going to happen for the sorting ceremony. The twins walked up to Ron and Harry, Ron was fretting at what the ceremony was, as Harry seemed lost in thought. "What's up?" John asked, snapping Harry out of his thoughts and Ron from the mumbles that surrounded him.

Harry was about to respond when some kids screamed and Harry jumped, pointing at the wall behind the twins. When they looked back, they saw 20 or so ghosts had passed through the back wall, arguing and not noticing the first years. They saw one, which from their uncles' stories they presumed was Fat Friar, say, "We ought to give him a chance, we all make mistakes, don't we?"

Another one in an old duke's dress was about to reply before noticing the first years and asking, "What are you doing here?"

"They're the new students obviously!" The Friar answered him, before moving around the children as he said, "I truly hope to see you in Hufflepuff! It was my old House."

"Go along now, the sorting ceremony is about to start for those of you hoping." Professor McGonagall's voice cut through the muttering of students and ghosts alike as she walked back in. Most of the ghosts held their heads down as if scolded by their mother, before all of them floated through the wall opposite their entrance.

"Now, In order to do the ceremony, I need you to form a line and follow me into the Great Hall." The Professor said. Everyone moved into a line and followed her out the door into the hall. The twins spun as they walked, taking in the sight around them and sharing it with each other, painting a beautiful picture of candles that floated meters into the air around the ceiling, with a similarly stunning view of the night sky as a backdrop. There were four long tables, each piled with students galore, with golden goblets and plates sitting in front of them. At the head of all the tables, a table that sat on a raised platform held multiple people they assumed were the other professors.

Out of John's eye, they saw Professor McGonagall leave, only to return with a hat and stool. The stool, didn't look quite new, but was eons better than the mangy hat that was set on top of it. They noticed the hat twitch when they both turned to face it, before it burst into song:

"Oh you may not think I'm pretty,

But don't judge on what you see,

I'll eat myself if you can find

A smarter hat than me.

You can keep your bowlers black,

Your top hats sleek and tall,

For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat

And I can cap them all.

There's nothing hidden in your head

The Sorting Hat can't see,

So try me on and I will tell you

Where you ought to be.

You might belong in Gryffindor,

Where dwell the brave at heart,

Their daring, nerve, and chivalry

Set Gryffindors apart;

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

Where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

And unafraid of toil;

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,

if you've a ready mind,

Where those of wit and learning,

Will always find their kind;

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folks use any means

To achieve their ends.

So put me on! Don't be afraid!

And don't get in a flap!

You're in safe hands (though I have none)

For I'm a Thinking Cap!"

The twins applauded with the rest of the school as the song came to an end, and Professor McGonagall walked up behind it with a long roll of parchment. "When I call your name, please step forward, put on the hat and sit down."

"Abbott, Hannah!"

A girl walked out of the line and sat down, putting the hat on her head, which promptly covered her eyes. The twins had a feeling that it would take a while, and started bringing out their spirits behind the line. Thankfully, everyone's focus was on the girl as the Hat cried out, "Hufflepuff!"

The table in the center right of the hall started cheering, and the twins mutely noted that they wore mainly yellow accents on their clothing. Another name was called, and another Hufflepuff was shouted as the same table cheered once more. More names were called and their respective tables cheered until one specific name called everyone's attention.

"Potter, Harry!"

Whispers sounded about, everyone talking over each other until they saw Harry walk out of the line and to the stool. Harry put the hat on, and it took a while until the hat shouted, "Better be, GRYFFINDOR!"

The table on the far left of the Great Hall erupted into cheers, and the twins could hear Fred and George chanting, "We've got Potter! We've got Potter!"

The clamor from the tables died down when the next name was called. They fell into a rhythm until they heard "John Eumann, Oriana Amaryllis, Concord!"

The tables grew loud once more as there has never been a case where more than one person was called. The Twins walked forward, under the collective gaze of the students and teachers alike, to the stool with their spirits following behind them. When they reached the stool, they looked at Professor McGonagall, and asked, "[May we?] {Should we}?"

The Professor wasn't entirely sure what to say, and looked at the Headmaster, who nodded, and she then turned back to the twins and said, "Yes, you may."

The twins then shifted into their Shiva form, eliciting the crowd's voices to grow to a crescendo, until a "Silence!" from both the Headmaster and Professor made the hall go silent. The twins sat on the stool, picking up the hat in the process and placing on their head. They then heard a voice in their ear.

"You have all the qualities of a Gryffindor, naturally brave and friendly, I see a good Hufflepuff as well, caring for friends and family alike. The Ravenclaw is also prominent as well, eager to learn and share with others what they've learned. I could put you in all the houses now that I notice the Slytherin in you, sharp and dangerous as a knife, and willing to bend a few rules to get what you want. I can see a prominent future in all of the houses for you, yet I cannot choose which to put you in." The hat mumbled, its' old voice lulled the twins into sleep.

The hat, as if noticing something absolutely dreadful, began to shake in everyone's view as the twins continued sleeping silently. The hat tried to speak, but a small croaking sound left its' mouth instead, causing it to clear its' imaginary throat before whispering hoarsely in a voice that was heard due to the piercing silence, "They . . . They go in every house. I can't choose one."

The silence continued for a few seconds until a collective roar was heard from every table and teacher present in the hall, startling the twins back awake as they wondered what had happened that made them so tired.

When they turned to look at Professor McGonagall, they saw a defeated expression as she looked at the twins.

"SILENCE!"

Everyone turned toward the Headmaster as he stood up after his outburst. "We will settle this matter later, but for now, let us enjoy the banquet. Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"

Food appeared in each and every platter that was on the tables, roast beef, roast chicken, a whole feast had appeared in front of everyone. The twins were still sitting in the stool while the hat was still on their head mumbling about its reason for existence when Professor McGonagall walked up to them and said, "We will discuss this later in the Headmaster's Office, go find somewhere to sit and eat first." and slightly pushed them in the general direction of the tables.

The twins shifted so they could walk side by side and when they looked toward the tables, everyone was whispering, pointing, and staring at the twins, and they chose to walk in front of each table to gauge their reaction.

They walked from right to left, starting with the Hufflepuff table. They had a mixed reaction, some with confusion, others with disgust, and quite a few with fascination. The Slytherin table was obviously displeased at their presence, moving to seats in order to make them leave, which they did. As they walked close to the Ravenclaw table, they saw most, if not all, looks of intrigue, which led them to believe that they just wanted to know more of how they worked. Gryffindor table, well, they noticed there was little change in their demeanor when they got near, which made them choose to sit near people they knew.

Ron was startled from his food as the twins chose to sit next to Harry. "Why are you both sitting here?"

"[Ron, we're not normal.]{And some people look like they want to kill us.}[While others look like they want to cut us open.]" The twins interchanged. "But your table doesn't."

Harry blinked. "Why next to me though?"

"Because you know us, and you probably won't ask a lot of {stupid} questions." They answered as they piled two plates with food, startling even Ron with the amount.

"Why did you grab so much food? Are you even going to eat it all?" Ron asked, his mouth filled with a disgusting mush that sprayed out as he spoke.

"This is what we mean by stupid questions." Oriana whispered to Harry, although he wanted to ask the same.

John's mouth was full so Oriana answered for him and some eavesdroppers around them, "We are literally two people with one body that has to stay connected. It's obviously going to take a lot of food to keep us fed. That's also not mentioning our, 'familiars', for dislike of explanation, also share the body. We also eat for them as well, and, well, there is also a bear, crocodiles, and a few pythons, they also eat a lot of food as well."

John finished what was in his mouth as Oriana took a bite and continued the answer. "We also have to take their diets into account as well." He said as he picked up an apricot and started rolling around on the table, making it soft. "For example, Axel, the Honduran White Bat, is a fruit bat, and drinks the juice of fruits as well as the nectar from some flowers."

He made a nearly indiscernible chirp in his throat, and everybody listening to the conversation could see a small white blur come down from the 'sky' and hang off his now outstretched arm. He then moved moved the bat from his arm, to his fingers, and from there, to a platter that was on a platform, where it's ears touched the table. They could barely hear another chirp, as he set the apricot in front of it, and the bat released another in reply before it reached out, grabbed it, and took a bite.

Everyone was awestruck at the demonstration. John then started to make a series of audible chirps from his mouth, and everyone saw the cat, bear, wolf, bird, and dog come to him, and they all saw him give them something to eat from his plate. He then turned to eat his food.

"Most of John's familiars eat just about anything and, with the canines and bear being omnivores, while the cat is a carnivore and the bat an herbivore, he can basically eat anything he likes." Oriana started talking after she swallowed. "I, however, took in reptiles, and while all are carnivorous, they would all like something alive."

She paused and started to make a sound as if she was clearing his throat, before stopping. John looked at her, and she nodded, before he reached over and started to choke her to everyone's surprise. She then started making a series of deep grunting sounds that was barely audible over the din of the hall. John released her throat, and that brought everyone's attention to the Komodo, snakes, and two crocodiles that were moving toward her.

"Warning for anyone stupid enough to try both this, and stepping on their tails." She started, as she grabbed different pieces of meat, some big, mostly small. She tapped the reptiles' snouts, and they opened their maws wide. She gave them a piece of meat that corresponded with their size, before opening her mouth and slamming it shut, letting her teeth clack together. Their jaws snapped shut around the meat they were given, scaring the peanut gallery.

"If you try to feed them, at best you might lose a hand, at worst, your arm. Step on their tails, and you will die." She said, looking at the people watching her speak. "And if they can't, I will." Everyone else gulped, while Harry looked at them questioningly as she continued to eat.

"So in other words, don't be a twit and we won't get attacked?" Ron said, his plate, and mouth, thank the heavens, empty.

"Yes, essentially." John said, his plate cleared of everything. "They might come to you out of curiosity, or to play in their case," He said, motioning to his, "And as you said Ron, act a twit, and you will, hopefully, be in the infirmary, if the school has one."

"Um, How...?" Harry started, pointing to his plate.

"[Bones?]"

Harry nodded. John showed his teeth to Harry, showing pointy teeth and extremely sharp canines, which were changing back into flat teeth with regular canines. "We are able to take on the traits of our familiars, which allow us more versatility in our actions. In this case, I was able to eat the bones."

"Why?" Harry asked.

Oriana answered this time as she had finished eating, "Again, two bodies, familiars' bodies, in one body. We have to keep up the nutrients in order to keep us going, and bones supply calcium and potassium, along with a few others. We can use that to reinforce our bones should we not need it somewhere else."

Ron, still looking at John's mouth, asked, "Can I touch your teeth when they're sharp?"

John looked at him weirdly, to which Ron blushed, "I just find it cool." he supplied.

John smiled at what he said, and nodded, before opening his mouth as the teeth sharpened once more. Ron reached out with his hand, and felt John's teeth. They were sharp, as one would expect them to be, yet when he felt them, he instinctively had no fear toward them, as he felt safe. John patted his arm to get him to stop. When he removed his arm, he noticed John's teeth were going back again.

"I never thought I'd have someone ever compliment me on that." John said, smiling.

"Give me a second." he then turned toward his group of familiars, who had finished eating earlier, and released a stream of clicks, chirps, and whistles. When he finished, the animals made their own sounds in return before moving to Ron, who tensed up as they all opened their mouths around him.

"They want you to do the same, as to them it means that you're a friend." John explained when Ron looked at him for assistance. Ron nodded, unsure of following that course of action. Reluctantly, he reached out with his hand, and felt their teeth.

The bear's teeth were a mix of flat and sharp, while the cat's teeth were predictably sharp. The bird had no teeth so he rubbed its' beak, and the bat's mouth was so small that the bat looked like it was nibbling on his finger. Instead of letting him feel their teeth, the Pitbull and wolf jumped on him and licked his face instead.

Ron spluttered with laughter, and so did the rest of the table. The laughter died down as the Headmaster got up from his seat.

"Before we head off to bed, I have a few start of term notices to give you." He started. "The forest on the grounds is forbidden to all students, no matter the age." He noticeably glanced at the Weasley twins before he continued. "No magic is to be used in between the halls as per the reminder of Mr. Filch, our caretaker. Quidditch trials are to be held in the second week of the term, contact Madam Hooch for information. Last but not least, this year, the third floor corridor on the right side is not to be entered unless you wish to die a painful death."

Very few people laughed at this, Harry included. However, their laughter stopped when they realized it wasn't a joke. Harry then asked a question to one of the Weasley siblings. When they finished, the Headmaster cried, "And now to sing the school song!"

The other teacher's smiles froze as he pulled out his wand and flicked out a golden colored ribbon, with yellow lyrics. "Everyone pick a tune, and off we go!" Dumbledore said as he waved his wand to conduct the school.

The twins looked at each other as John conjured a violin, and Oriana a cello.

[Canon in Two?]

Oriana nodded.

Everyone bellowed the lyrics, each one unique from the rest:

"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,

Teach us something please~. {Teach us something please~.}"

They started horrendously, with it sounding like Eeylops Owl Emporium.

"Whether we be old and bald,

Or young with scabby knees~. [Young with scabby knees~.]"

As they continued singing, a certain duo of voices was heard above the rest, slowly silencing everyone who stopped to listen.

"Our heads could do with fill~ing,{Do with fill~ing.}

With something to rest insi~de[Knowledge to rest insi~de]."

They also heard two instruments as well, that not only paired with the voices, but constantly danced as they passed the melody between each other.

"[For now they're bare and full of air,]

{Dead flies and bits of fluff.}"

The hall came to silence, including the Weasley twins, who were singing a funeral march.

"{So teach us things worth knowing},

[Bring back what we've forgot.]"

The population of the Great Hall was staring at the twins as they easily passed the song's melody up and down with notes, with the cello and violin interweaving between the two seamlessly.

"{Just do your best, we'll do the rest},

[And learn until our brains all rot.]"

When the twins finished, they looked up from their disappearing instruments to see the entirety of the Great Hall staring at them, before Harry started clapping, causing a thunderous roar of clapping to pass through the hall, making the twins blush as they bowed.

"Music!" Dumbledore said to the hall, "A magic that everyone can do!"

"Music indeed." A witch in dirt-stained robes agreed, nodding toward Professor McGonagall.

"And now, off to bed!" Dumbledore said. Motioning toward boys and girls with badges, Percy included.

"Follow me to my office if you will, Mr. Eumann and Mrs. Amaryllis. We must figure out where to put you for your stay." He said as he passed by the twins. They nodded, and followed along.