Earthbound Hell

I was staring at him, thinking. I was bleeding and had to get out of there. I made up something ion my mind then said: He took my everything.

Owen: So you're after revenge? With such weak body?

-I'm strong enough.

Owen: Then why are broken like that?

-It's the side effects of the explosion.

Owen: Oh really! Then why did you fall from the roof?

I was in pain and he, questioning was so much for me to handle. I just wanted to get out, he was irritating. He went on and on, I didn't know what was his goal but if it was to get me mad and do something hastily, then he won.

-Why? Why? Just why are questioning me? What's your goal? Why do you do this? Why am I stuck here with you? Why? Why don't you shut your mouth? Why do you want to confirm that I'm weak? Why are you doing this?

I shouldn't have gotten angry, my clothes got once again drenched in blood and I lost my strength. He came near me, looked at me while moving his head in a sarcastic way.

Owen: You wanna know why?

He stood up then told me: Get up.

-I…. I can't.

Owen: Isn't that enough to satisfy your childish questions?

He was right but I didn't want to agree with him. He wasn't even Jeremy to tell me such things, he had no right to say so. He took me from the ground and went outside.

The outside was in a horrible state, there were corpses everywhere. I couldn't get Jeremy's betrayal out of my head even though I trusted him a lot, but I just couldn't believe that such failure, such battle occurred on the same day as I had accomplished something important. Wait a second, I wasn't a winner that day, I was a loser from the beginning. Since the day I opened my eyes in a rotten world, I was a loser. I never succeeded, not even once. And yet, I want to call myself a winner, isn't that funny? It's hilarious. We, humans, we all think we are winner but if we think carefully, there's only a thing that wins for sure. You wanna know what it is? Well, we all get to experience it, we all get familiar to it at some point, where our stories had ended. It wins every time, there's no escape from it. And I, for sure will experience it, since I'm a human, no matter how I deny it.

There was blood everywhere, I could even see pieces of what was used to call a human being. I didn't know If I was lucky or unlucky to have gotten out of such brutal battlefield, I felt relieved for some reason but, it was wrong, I was ready for such battles, I made a swore to Jeremy to make him proud of me, he was the one who found me, helped me, so I had to be ready to fight for him, he was my everything. Or maybe I was wrong.

Owen: What do you see?

I couldn't talk because I was getting paler and paler.

Owen: You were among such monsters who cut themselves into halves, if you're not on their side then you're a weak one. Did you get the answer? This battlefield is filled with corpses and you were the only survivor, you survived it but the side effects got to you. This is the world you had set foot into, you don't get to complain because you chose it.

He was right but was it possible in my situation to choose? It wasn't possible because I broke the bridge which I had used to walk on and there was nothing else to help me get back. I made something possible, impossible for eternity.

I didn't know where he was taking me to, I was still mad at myself for getting myself into such humiliating state. He put me down, then said: Wait here until I'm back.

I looked at the graveyard which we were passing through, it was disgusting. The smell of blood was unbearable, the graveyards that I had been to were nice, calm in piece. Well that explains everything. The outside was beautiful and disgusting but the inside is only disgusting and hateful. That was the truth about the world, which humans were so proud of. Everything was made by blood, everything was built on blood, people were born out of blood shedding, people died by blood shedding, they breathed by blood, they danced by blood, blood, blood, blood.

I never knew I would get disgusted even by something which is running in my own veins. I looked away to Owen's direction. I hadn't realized it back then but with such a simple act of turning my head, I turned away from the reality and drowned myself in a false dream of mine. What was even the dream? I don't know and never knew, or maybe I knew? Whatever it is, I forgot it long ago. I even lost the ideal world which I was welcomed to, since that moment, I never got another chance to go through the gates of my utopia and find peace, That's what you get for killing, for murdering, for shutting your eyes, for closing your ears. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of everything I did, they did, I'm sick of it all.

Owen was calling someone, there was no alive being there. What happened to team 26? I t was somehow impossible to believe they were dead, they were Jeremy's secret power, they couldn't have died. But they deserved to die. We all deserved to die.

He came back to me and said: Help is on the way.

-Is anyone alive there?

Owen: No one. Were your comrades there? Feel free to tell me.

-I work alone.

Owen: Well of course, no one wants to team up with such a weakling like you.

I bursted into tears and said: Leave me alone.

Owen: What's wrong with you?

-Nothing.

Owen: Oh! Am I getting on your nerves?

I couldn't stand him; he was too much for me to handle.

After some minutes a helicopter came and took us away. Where were we heading to? I was afraid to ask, because he wouldn't tell me and he would obviously say something unbearable to me. I was never weak, mentally, I was always strong, but the fact that Jeremy wasn't there and my comrades were dead, it made my mental state a big mess. My body in pain, my mind in a mess, my heart shattered to pieces, we passed by cities and reached a new land. I wasn't able to see it completely since I passed out as soon as we arrived at the destination, but I was able to hear. They weren't meaningful since my mind couldn't comprehend them. I felt like I was being taken to somewhere, was it heaven? Oh my God! I even thought of going to heaven after what I had done, if it was the afterlife then it was hell for sure.

I was wrong, I was alive and still breathing in that rotten world.