19. Chapter Nineteen

The smell of bacon grease, coffee, and maple syrup assaulted Waverly’s nose as she took a seat across from her Uncle at their usual table.

The usual hustle and bustle of the diner was a sort of comfort for Waverly. The chatter from the townsfolk filling the booths, the sound of food being prepped and cooked just beyond the small window that separated the diner and the kitchen, the sound of silverware clinking against plates, glasses and coffee mugs hitting the tables with dull thuds, was all familiar and put Waverly at ease.

After the past two days, fighting with Champ (who was still waiting for her to apologize), and taking care of Nicole last night (which she would gladly do over and over again), she needed some time with her Uncle, her rock, the man who raised her as his own.

“So what is it that you and Champ are fighting about?” Curtis asked, handing their menus over to Hetty after they had given their orders.

It was just the two of them this morning, no Champ (thank God, she really didn’t want to see or deal with him at the moment), and no Gus (which she was a little upset about, she missed her Aunt and even though they seen each other at work, it wasn’t enough).

“What makes you think we’re fighting?” Waverly asked, wrapping her hands around her warm coffee mug and bringing it to her lips, taking a sip and humming as the coffee warmed her body.

Nicole . Nicole had been the reason they were fighting.

Just the thought of Nicole had Waverly fighting off a smile. Nicole who was probably still sleeping, still hugging the pillow Waverly had slipped in between them to detach herself from the older woman this morning, probably still snoring away softly in that adorable way of hers. Nicole, who even when her silky red locks were a tangled mess, splashed across her face and, her eyes were still a bit red and puffy from crying most of the night, she was still the most exquisite thing, person, that Waverly has ever laid eyes on.

“He was rather pissy at work yesterday, broke quite a few things in his rage.”

He had to send Champ home half way through the day because the boy was distracted, too caught up in his rage that he ended up breaking the fence they had been hired to repair. He tolerated a lot from that boy but he would not tolerate him messing with his livelihood, with how he took care of his family.  

Champ had a temper, it was nothing new. Waverly knew that he had one but usually he lashed out verbally, never physically and if Waverly was being completely honest with herself, it scared her a bit that he had lashed out physically because he was mad at her.

What if she had went after him when he stormed out after their fight? What if that anger, that rage had been directed at her?

Waverly sighed and ran her fingers through her hair.

“So again, what are you two fighting about?” Her Uncle probed. He wanted to get to the bottom of this, one to make sure his niece was okay and two, he really needed Champ actually doing his job.

“He seen me talking with Nicole and just freaked out,” Waverly mumbled.

She could understand why he had gotten so upset. Her and Nicole had been standing very close, so close that there was hardly any space between them. Her hands had been cupping Nicole’s face in a way that could have looked like they were about to kiss and maybe if Champ hadn’t interrupted, hadn’t been in the picture she might have actually kissed Nicole.

Maybe he was rightful in his anger because she would have kissed Nicole and she probably wouldn’t have been able to stop. And that was the thing, Waverly found herself wanting to kiss Nicole, wanting to be with Nicole, around Nicole more than she ever wanted to kiss Champ, be with him, around him.

That was unfair to Champ, to be with him when she wanted more than anything to be with Nicole. It was unfair to him to pretend to love him when she was so in love with Nicole Haught.  

And she was in love with Nicole, so damn in love with her. So much so that it hurt to not be with her, to be away from her, to pretend that she didn’t love her.

“Did he have something to freak out over?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

“What do you mean? We were just talking?” She played dumb. Just because she could admit to herself that she was in love with Nicole, doesn’t mean that she was ready to say it out loud, to admit it to someone else.

“Waverly, I’m not stupid and I’m not blind, you care for Nicole, a lot.” He reached across the table and grasped one of her hands in his.

He wanted her to be honest with him but more importantly, he wanted her to be honest with herself. He wanted his Waverly to be happy and he knew that since Nicole Haught walked into her life, she’s the happiest she’s ever been.

“Of course I do, she’s my best friend.”

“It’s more than that Waverly, I see the way you look at her, see the way you light up when she walks into a room, hear the way you talk about her.”

Waverly looked away from him, her fingers drumming against her coffee mug. She was scared to tell him the truth, tell him that she was in love with a woman.

Sure he seemed calm and accepting at the possibility of her having feelings for Nicole but how would he react at her having feelings for Nicole, a woman, becoming more than a possibility, becoming a reality. How would Gus react?

She’s never known either of them to be homophobic but that didn’t mean they couldn’t freak out right? She was teriffed that they would hate her, be disgusted with her and she’d lose them and she couldn’t handle losing the two people who raised her, who loved her, who were always there.

“Gus and I don’t care if you are in love with a woman, if you date a woman,” he told her, squeezing her hand gently. “We will love you no matter what Waverly, we want you to be with someone who makes you happy, someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated, someone who understands how lucky they are to have you and if that person is Nicole Haught, then kiddo, you gotta go for it, you gotta take the risk because Haught is a real catch and someone will see that and swoop her up if you don’t.”

Tears pricked at Waverly’s eyes at her Uncle’s words, his support, his love. This man, who was practically her father, who cared for her more than Ward Earp ever did, who was the only family (besides Gus), she hadn’t lost, who hadn’t left her, would accept her, love her no matter what, no matter who she loved and that?

It meant everything to her and it took a huge weight off her shoulders and eased the fear that had gripped her heart like a vice.

Waverly got up from her seat and moved to the side of the booth Curtis was sitting in. She slid in beside him as he turned sideways to face her, opening his arms up for her.

She launched herself into his embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest, like she used to do when she was a little girl and had nightmares about the night her daddy was killed and Willa was taken.

“I love her,” Waverly whispered into his chest and his arms tightened around her. “I love her so much it scares me.”

And it did scare her, it scared her to death but at the same time, it filled her with this lightness, with this overwhelming amount of joy.

She never knew love could be so scary, yet so exhilarating all at once. She never knew love could feel like this. She never knew that she could love someone so much.

Sure she loved Champ in a way but she didn’t love him in the same way she loved Nicole. She wasn’t in love with him like she was in love with Nicole.

“I know kiddo, I know.” He kissed the top of her head

“I need to break up with Champ.”

The thought of not having Champ in her life, nothing having the one constant thing in her life used to terrify her but now? Now, she had Nicole and Nicole had quickly become a constant in her life, had quickly become a strong, steady presence in her life, had become someone Waverly knew she could count on.

“I think that’s for the best, Waverly.”

When Nicole finally rolled out of bed that morning at half past ten, her apartment was empty save for McGonagall, who had woken Nicole up by meowing in her face to be fed.

Nicole shuffled into the kitchen with McGonagall on her heels, still meowing away. “Alright, alright I’m going, no need to be so impatient.”

McGonagall’s answer to this was to meow louder and swat playfully at Nicole's ankles.

Nicole leaned down and scooped the orange tabby up in her arms. “What are you doing, huh?” She cooed at her as she scratched under her chin.

It was a ritual they did most morning, not the whole McGonagall meowing into her face until she woke up but McGonagall playing with her feet as she walked to the kitchen.

It was Nicole’s favorite part of her mornings. The familiar routine brought her a sense of comfort, made no matter where they were feel like home.

When Nicole had first left home after joining the police academy, she left McGonagall with her then girlfriend, Jennifer, to look after. Two weeks into her training and she missed home terribly, missed her grandpa, Trent, Jennifer, and most of all McGonagall. Two weeks and the crappy, rundown apartment she was staying in felt nothing like a home. She was homesick and lonely and while she enjoyed her training and everything she was learning, she wanted to go home, go back to working on her grandpa’s farm.

After talking with his sister nearly every night and noticing how depressed she was becoming and how utterly homesick she was, Trent put McGonagall in his truck and drove two days to give Nicole a slice of home.  

Coming home to McGonagall and not an empty apartment after a excruciatingly long day of training made all the difference to Nicole, made things bearable. Waking up every morning at four a.m. and having McGonagall chasing her feet started Nicole’s day off smiling.

Sure, she had still been a bit homesick but having McGonagall there with her made being away from home and the people she loved hurt just a little less. Having McGonagall there with her made her crappy apartment feel a little bit more like home.

Setting McGonagall down on the kitchen counter, Nicole opened the cabinet she kept McGonagall’s food in, grabbing a can out and shutting the cabinet. She opens the can, nose wrinkling in disgust at the smell.

“How do you eat this stuff?” She asked as she dumped the can’s contents into McGonagall’s food bowl that sat on the floor next to the fridge.

In reply McGonagall brushed her head against Nicole’s leg before wandering over to her food bowl.

Standing up, Nicole caught sight of a note with her name on it attached to the fridge. She rinsed the can out and tossed it into the recycle bin before drying her hands and grabbing the note.

She ran her fingers over neat handwriting that definitely did not belong to her brother. Taking a seat at the kitchen table, she unfolds the note, eyes skimming over the page before going back to the top.

Nicky, I fed McGonagall before I left, so don’t let her fool you into feeding her again-

Nicole looked up from the paper in her hands and towards her cat, who was happily munching away on her food. “You’re gonna get fat.”

McGonagall flicked her tail at her owner as if to say ‘I don’t care’ and continued to eat her food.

Nicole shook her head with a small laugh and turned her attention back to the note.

-I know that last night was hard for you and I’m sure today is going to be hard as well but, just remember that I believe in you Nicole, that I have faith in you, remember that you are a good cop, that you are good at your job. I know that you know deep down that you are an amazing cop, you just have to believe in yourself like I do. Trent and I are picking Chinese up for dinner, so just text me what you want. Have a good day at work Nicky.

P.S. On your way into work, stop by the diner there’s a plate of pancakes waiting there for you.

P.P.S. You snore too but it’s pretty adorable.

Nicole folded the note back up with a grin and pushed herself out of her chair to get ready for work.

Once Nicole was dressed, she stared at her reflection in the full length mirror hanging on the back of her bedroom door, hands running along her leather utility belt absentmindedly.

She tried not to let what happened yesterday get to her, she tried not to let it overtake her mind. If she thought about freezing up last night too much then she wouldn’t want to go into work, she wouldn’t want to face Eric or anyone else at the station.

Nicole brought her hand up to the left breast pocket on her shirt, feeling Waverly’s note tucked safely inside.

Waverly was right, Nicole knew deep down that she was a good cop. Her grandpa had trained her to be more than a decent cop, a better cop than her father. But there was always those doubts that lingered in the back of her mind, day in and day out and, last night had brought all those doubts to the surface and suddenly she couldn’t ignore them any longer.

Waverly’s words, written and spoken had eased a good bit of them, quited her father’s voice in her mind, made those doubts bearable again. And for that, Nicole would be forever grateful.

With one final look at herself in the mirror, Nicole placed her stetson on her head and left her bedroom, collecting her keys and phone before locking up and leaving her apartment.

After stopping by the diner to pick up the breakfast Waverly ordered for her and ordering a stack of pancakes for Eric, Nicole headed to the station.

“Morning Haught,” Eric greeted as she walked through the station towards her desk, dropping the takeout box of pancakes on his desk as she passed.

He studied her as she made her way to her desk. Her shoulders were slightly slumped, she wasn’t standing as tall as usual and she looked like she didn’t get more than a few hours of sleep.

He was worried about her. Last night was hard on her, hell it was hard on him and he’s been on the job going on ten years now.

He wasn’t sure how she was handling things but he hoped that she was alright. No matter if she did freeze up last night, she was a great cop. She had more training than most (perk of growing up in a family of law enforcement), she was smart, alert, she had a strong view of right and wrong but most importantly, she had instincts.

If she learned from last night and not let it eat away at her, Eric knew that she could go far in her career, probably even be sheriff one day. And he would root for her every step of the way, guild her if needed, give her every ounce of knowledge and advice he had to offer.

“You brought me breakfast?” He asked when he opened up the takeout box. “Have a told you that you’re my favorite lately?”

Nicole didn’t answer him, Eric wasn’t even sure that she had even heard him. She was just staring at her open takeout box, gripping tightly to the plastic fork in her hand.

Eric rolled his chair towards her desk. “Nicole.”

Nicole looked up at him, blinking her eyes a few times, clearing that far away look that clouded her eyes. “Yeah?”

“You okay?” He asked, blue eyes shining with concern.

“I’m good,” Nicole nodded, her grip loosening on her folk a bit, as she stabbed a pancake with it.

“You know, my second year on the job there was this out of towner driving drunk down main street and this family of five had just left the diner when the driver lost control of his car.” His voice had taken on a rough tone, as if his emotions were getting the better of him. “The family was walking down the sidewalk when the car ran up on the sidewalk and struck the youngest boy.”

He could still hear the sounds of that mother screaming as her baby boy laid pinned under that car. It was a sound he was likely never to forget.

“I arrived on scene before EMTs and I saw that little boy under the front tire and there was so much blood, I didn’t even know that a body so small could hold so much blood and I froze, I just stood still and stared while the mother screamed and his siblings cried and his father tried to figure out a way to pull him free.”

“Did the boy make it?” Nicole asked, looking at him with glassy eyes.

“Yeah, he made it,” Eric nodded. “But my point is, that we all freeze Nicole, we all see something on this job that we can’t handle, that our brains can’t process and we shut down, even the best of us and you, Nicole, are one of the best rookies I’ve seen in my ten years on this job.”

That pulled a small smile from the younger officer but it was short lived.

“We all freeze and you can either let it eat away at you or you can keep going and not give up, let it make you stronger, let it make you a better officer.”

“Thanks Eric.” Nicole gave him another small smile, twisting her fork into her pancakes, ripping them apart.

He was right. She could either let that one moment get the better of her, let it strip away her confidence and her ability to do her job. Or, she could learn from it and be better, become a better officer.

“Anytime Haught,” he smiled and pushed himself back to his desk. “Hurry up and eat, Nedley wants us to go see Nancy and try to talk her into getting a restraining order on her husband.”

When Nicole arrived home that night from another exhausting and frustrating day, filled with her and Eric trying and failing to convince Nancy to get a restraining order, paperwork, and watching David McDaniels walk out of the station after making bail with the help of his lawyer, Constance Clootie.

Music and laughter greeted her as she locked the front door then untied and kicked her work boots off. She couldn’t help but to smile at the sound of Waverly’s laughter. It was like music to her ears.

The sound of Waverly’s laughter was enough to wash away all the frustrations from her day, it was enough to make Nicole feel better and it was definitely something she could get used to coming home to.  

She shouldn’t get used to it though, she knew she shouldn’t. It was only a matter of time before Waverly and Champ made up. It was only a matter of time before Waverly went back to her apartment and Nicole wouldn’t come home to the younger woman anymore, wouldn’t get to crawl into bed with her at night anymore.

Nicole hung her hat on the hook by the door before making her way towards the living room where the music and laughter was coming from. She leaned against the archway separating the living room and kitchen and watched her brother and the woman she’s in love with slow dance around the room together to some old country song.

Trent caught sight of Nicole and smirked at her, pulling Waverly closer as they continued to dance.

Nicole glared at her brother as white hot envy shot through her and settling somewhere deep in her chest.

She should be the one dancing around her living room with Waverly. She should be the one dancing with Waverly to the ‘ Her ’ playlist she made. She should be the one that Waverly’s arms are wrapped around. She should be the one with Waverly’s head resting on her shoulder.

She should be the one with Waverly in every single way, not her brother and definitely not Champ Freakin’ Hardy. If only she was brave enough to tell Waverly how she feels.

Trent spun Waverly around and Waverly grinned when she saw Nicole, dropping Trent’s hand.

Nicole was struck by how breathtaking Waverly’s smile was, how beautiful her eyes were when she was truly smiling, how they seemed to shine. She’d never tire of the way Waverly was able to steal the breath right from her lungs. She’d never tire of the way her heart beat wildly in her chest every time Waverly’s smile was directed at her.

She’d never tire of the way her body, her heart, her soul reacted to Waverly Earp.

“Hey, I didn’t hear you come in,”

“Yeah, well you seemed pretty busy.” There was a bite to her tone, that jealousy creeping in, causing both Waverly and Trent to raise an eyebrow at her.

She shouldn’t be jealous, she had no reason to be jealous. Trent didn’t have a thing for Waverly and even if he did, he’d never make a move on Waverly knowing how Nicole feels about her. But that didn’t stop her from being jealous, that didn’t stop the bite in her tone, the glare she sent her brother.

“I’m just gonna get something to eat, it’s been a long day,” she mumbled, turning on her heels, moving towards the kitchen when Waverly called out, causing her to turn back around.

“Oh, we didn’t pick up dinner,” Waverly said, tone apologetic as well as her smile. “Trent suggested we wait until you got home.”

Waverly smiling at her, even an apologetic smile eased Nicole’s jealously. Waverly had that effect on her, was able to ease whatever she was feeling with just a simple smile.

“That’s okay, I’ll go pick something up,” Nicole gave Waverly a small smile. “What do you guys want?”

“I’ll go get dinner,” Trent offered, motioning Nicole over towards them as he turned to Waverly. “You know, Nicky is a way better dancer than I am, she taught me everything I know, so you two dance and I’ll get dinner.”  

Without waiting for any objections, Trent grabbed his phone as he quickly left the room, typing out a quick text to Shorty, Amy and Chrissy, letting them know that part one of their plan was in motion.

Once Trent was out of the room and they were left alone, Nicole moved to stand in front of Waverly and held her hand out to the younger woman. “Dance with me?”

There was no way in hell that she was going to pass up the chance to dance with Waverly Earp, not when it could be her only chance to dance with her.

The opening notes to ‘Can’t Help Falling in Love’ played throughout the living room and Nicole couldn’t help but to smile at how fitting the song was.

She couldn’t help falling in love with Waverly, she never even had a choice. One look at Waverly and she was a goner. Waverly had stolen her heart the second their eyes met.  

“I’d love to,” Waverly whispered, placing her hand in Nicole’s as she let her other hand come to rest on Nicole’s shoulder.

Nicole’s grasped Waverly’s hip lightly, pulling her just a bit closer until there was barely any space between them and led them into a simple sway.

Nicole marveled at the way her and Waverly seen to fit together perfect. The way they moved together, so in sync with one another, as if they were made to spend their whole lives dancing with just each other.

She basked in the way Waverly’s hand fit in hers. The way Waverly’s warm body felt pressed against her. The way Waverly stared up at her with those doe like eyes.

Nicole could have sworn she saw something akin to love, to want, to lust shining in those eyes. And that look had Nicole’s heart beating rapidly against her rib cage, that had the walls she tried so hard to keep around her heart crumbling down, that had her wanting to throw caution to the wind and just kiss the hell out of Waverly.  

“Waverly,” Nicole breathed out, removing her hand from Waverly’s hip and bringing it up to cup her cheek.

She was going to do it. She was going to put everything on the line, her heart, their friendship, everything. She was going to finally, finally give in to her feelings for Waverly. She was going to kiss Waverly, tell her that she loves her, that she’s so fuckin’ in love with her that it hurt, consequences be damned.  

“You know, I don’t get to dance like this very often,” Waverly said quietly, effectively stopping the words from leaving Nicole’s mouth, stopping her from leaning in and connecting their lips.

Nicole suppressed a sigh and dropped her hand from Waverly’s cheek back down to her hip picking up their dancing once more.

The time wasn’t right. She couldn’t just confess her love for this woman when Waverly was still with Champ. She couldn’t just kiss her when Champ is still in the picture. She couldn’t make them cheaters, she couldn’t make Waverly a cheater.

She just had to wait it out, wait until Waverly finally breaks up with Champ and then tell her how she feels.

She didn’t want to wait any longer, she didn’t want to hold it in any longer but she knew that it would be better if she did.

“No?” Nicole questioned as she led Waverly into a spin before pulling her back in.

“Champ’s idea of dancing is basically having sex on the dance floor,” Waverly said, leaning into Nicole more as they continued to sway side to side slowly.

She was trying very hard not to just stand up in her tippy toes, grasp the collar of Nicole’s uniform shirt and bring her down for a kiss. But God, she wanted nothing more than to just kiss her and let everything else fade away until it was just the two of them.

“That’s a damn shame,” Nicole drawled and that husky tone had Waverly squirming against her as heat shot through her and settled between her legs. “Because you are an amazing dancer.”

“Thanks,” Waverly laid her head against Nicole’s chest, letting the hand on Nicole’s shoulder to slide down and wrap around her waist. “I’m breaking up with Champ tomorrow.”

“Yeah?” Nicole kissed the top of Waverly’s head then laid her cheek against the top of Waverly’s head, eyes closing as she hummed along to the new song playing.

“Mhm,” Waverly nodded against Nicole's chest.

Nicole could feel hope surge within her. If all went as planned, if Waverly actually breaks up with Champ tomorrow then this time tomorrow Nicole could tell Waverly how she feels, this time tomorrow she may finally be able to kiss Waverly.

It was 5:30 A.M. when Nicole’s phone started ringing almost non stop. After the third call, Nicole separated herself from Waverly and rolled out of bed, grabbing her phone from the night stand.

She stumbled towards the bathroom to keep from waking both Waverly and Trent, though she supposed that if the ringing phone didn’t wake Waverly nothing would. Waverly slept like the dead, somehow took up most of the bed with her tiny body and snored in the cutest way and Nicole couldn’t help but to fall in love with her even more for it.

Nicole closed the bathroom door and answered the phone. “Haught.”

“Nicole, I need you out at the Earp homestead immediately,” Sheriff Nedley’s gruff voice floated through the line, instantly waking Nicole fully.

“The Earp homestead Sir?”

She didn’t even know there was an Earp homestead. She didn’t even know that Waverly owned a piece of land. Maybe she should start listening to what the people around town have to say about the Earps.

“Yes, it’s Curtis McCreedy.”