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FOREARM WARRIOR

A fantasy parody heavily inspired by Dungeon and Dragons. Does this novel take itself seriously? Fuck no. Is it good? Probably not. A young hero with massive forearms goes on an adventure, after being kicked out of the house at 2 and a half years old.

GodOfGrammor · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
12 Chs

Camping like a Alpha Male Chp 6

MLML begins to tread down the path toward his next destination. The dirt path is only wide enough for a singular wagon or cart. In the miles around Greenflower, there are continuous rolling hills. Beautiful flowers bloom this time of year. During spring, wheat, corn, and other crops are grown by farmers on the outskirts of town. He passes the occasional shallow river with crystal clear water. It is home to a variety of fish species. This water is relatively safe to drink without even being boiled. MLML stops to fill up with water skin that is made from tanned leather that his father signal gave to him. Trees are lacking in this geographic area. Most of the houses in the town of Greenflower were constructed with imported wood. The only vegetation, other than tall grasses, is bushy trees that are no more than 20 feet tall. He is currently making good pace. Guided by old farm fences on either side of him.

It was actually quite a boring start to his journey. The only form of entertainment was either working out his forearms or his inner thoughts, which usually brought him more heartache than boredom relief. He also whistled melodies that contained no rhythm or pitch.

After his first full day of travel, he finally found a suitable spot to set up camp. It was definitely a place that has been used as a campsite prior. It was just under a wispy bush-like tree. There was a fireplace and several logs set around in a circle as seats.

MLML got to work, collecting kindling and other items that would burn well. He would not be able to have a large fire, because of the lack of trees in the area. So thin dead branches, some old fence material, and some dead grasses would have to do. He smacked his rock-hard forearms off his flint, which caused a spark that ignited the fire with ease.

He sat down and picked through his package from Chuck. He decided to finally try on the robe he was given. Before, he wore just dirty hemp clothes that looked similar to Swiss cheese. The black robe covered his body and slid on perfectly. Once it reached his forearms it compressed them to that of the average beta male. This in no way decreased his power but gave him the grower, not a shower effect. The robe was in pristine condition; the embroidered silver line that ran down the arms and back seemed to have magical resistance enchanted onto it.

Soon after MLML decided to settle in for the night, the day's fatigue finally started to catch up with him. He had never camped out alone before, so he planned a unique way to keep watch, and catch some z's. He climbed up to the near top of the 20-foot tree, latched his forearms to the tree, and hung. He looked like a big bat, sleeping soundly in the natural cavernous ecosystem it was home to.

He slept soundly until morning came. When a ray of light finally beamed him in the eye, around daybreak, he could tell something was off. Just below where he was hanging was a goofy ass-looking goblin wearing overalls with a beer belly peering at him. A top of his head was a conical hat that just accentuated his stupidity.