MOVING AWAY FROM SEATTLE

It was the beginning of summer vacation in Seattle, 2009, and I, Max Stellar, a 34-year-old mother of five, was ready to take control of my life. I had always felt like a boat without pedals on a river, just drifting through life. It was time for a change, and I was about to make a major decision.

I was adopted by Herald and Rachel Stellar, who owned a large real estate business, when I was a baby in 1976. I lived with them until I turned 18, and I had a step-brother, James Stellar, who was 20 years older than me. We never had a close relationship since he started his own business and family soon after completing his studies.

Growing up, I felt different from them. They were small and white, while I looked like a native woman after my growth spurt. Perhaps it was my whole appearance or my lack of interest in their wealthy lifestyle, but they always gave me my space, and I felt a gap between us. They tried to find my biological parents, but they couldn't. The gap only increased after the birth of my son Harry. Even though they were there for important functions, they kept a distance. Phone calls became less frequent after the birth of my daughters, and they passed away about five years ago, leaving me and my children enough money to live a comfortable life. Even my step-brother sends us money yearly, and I am grateful for all their love and support.

Harry Smith, my eldest son, turned 16 this summer and has always been my beacon of light. He's built just like me, and his father, John Smith, agreed to marry me after I got pregnant at 17. We lived together for two years before separating with mutual understanding, but Harry stayed with me.

Megan Wane, my 14-year-old daughter, was the result of my first love, Richard Wane. It was a wonderful year, and I had never felt so happy. We traveled together, saw many places, and fully opened our hearts to each other. Unfortunately, he cheated on me while I was pregnant with Megan, ending our relationship. Megan looks just like her father, with blonde hair, blue eyes, and a great sense of humor.

Sophie Miller, my 12-year-old daughter, is the daughter of Gary Miller. After Richard's betrayal, I was in a bad mental state, filled with anger and depression. To escape it, I tried to drink myself to sleep in a bar, where I met Gary, who was also in a similar predicament. In the end, we slept together, and Sophie was born. Although we were never married, Gary was always there for Sophie and me.

Lastly, my twin sons, Keri and Kame Moor, are five years old and the sons of Stephen Moor. They are my sweetest kitties and always distract me from my own world. Their names came from the Bakairi folklore, and Stephen always said he was a long-lost descendant. We got married after two years of being together, and it was a well-planned and good relationship. But something changed after the birth of the twins. I became angry, depressed, and my whole view of life changed. It felt like Stephen was stealing every piece of my life, and by staying in that state, it was poisoning both of our lives.

I love my family and my five children so much that I waited for five years to get away from the life I had planned with the fathers of my children. I didn't want them to feel lonely like I had. It was a difficult decision, but I finally put my foot down. My husband, Stephen, agreed to divorce me after living together for six years in Seattle.

As I approached the car with my ex-husband Stephen and our twins, memories of our past flooded my mind. Stephen's words caught me off guard. "Max," he said, his voice tinged with emotion. "You don't have to do this, we can work it out somehow." His eyes were wide and wild, just like they used to be when we first met. I couldn't help but feel a spasm of sadness as I looked at him. My heart ached at the thought of breaking our family apart, especially when I saw our children, who looked just like him, except with long black hair and full of smiles.

In that moment, I struggled to hold back my tears. How could I do this to him? How could I take his sons away from him, a strong-willed and wonderful man? Despite the pain I knew it would cause, I had to leave. It was better for everyone, even though I could see the hurt and relief in Stephen's eyes.

"I have to go," I lied, feeling guilty for deceiving him yet again. I'd been telling him this lie so often lately that it sounded almost like a plea.

Stephen bent down to our children and promised, "I'll see you soon. You can come home whenever you want — and I'll come right to you as soon as you need me." His love for them was evident in every word he spoke.

"Don't worry," I urged him, trying to sound confident. "We will be alright." I hugged him goodbye, feeling his arms wrap around me tightly. For a moment, it felt like nothing had changed between us, but then he turned and walked away to his car. The pain in his eyes was a stark reminder of the difficult road ahead.

I had made the decision to exile myself to Forks, and it was a choice I made with great determination. I wasn't afraid of the place itself, but rather the unknown future that awaited us. Harry, my dependable and mature eldest son, had taken the news quite calmly and even seemed pleased about the move. Megan, the family comedian, had turned the whole thing into a fun adventure. However, Sophie, my rebellious daughter, had put up a fight until the very last minute, refusing to accept our move to Forks. As for Keri and Kame, my twin boys, they followed Harry's lead and stayed quiet throughout the ordeal.

Harry was my rock, my support, and my beacon of light through this difficult time. The fathers of my children had helped us move by transporting our belongings to Forks, and even chipped in to gift Harry a car, which was already parked at our new home.

Forks, located in the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington State, was a small and inconsequential town that was almost always covered in clouds. It was known to be the rainiest place in the United States of America. Despite this, I had always been drawn to this town and its green, omnipresent shade. I had heard about the local news regarding the Native Americans of Forks, and after doing some research, I found out that it was close to the beach and the forest, and the weather was cold and rainy. I had always dreamed of finding a partner who would hold me tight on a beach during a storm, and for some reason, Forks seemed like the perfect place for us to start over.

The drive from Seattle to Forks was a four-hour journey, and although the driving itself didn't bother me, I was worried about spending hours in the car with my children. The silence, sadness, and gloominess that filled the car made me almost want to turn back. None of them could understand why we had to leave, and I knew they were more than a little confused by my decision - just like my previous partners had been. Despite this, I was determined to make this work and start anew in Forks with my children.

After two hours of travel, I dreadfully asked

"Hey guys, how's everyone feeling about the move so far?"

Megan:" I'm excited to explore our new surroundings and see what's out there."

Sophie:" I'm still not happy about this. I miss my friends and our old home."

Keri: "Mommy, are we going to have a new home?"

"Yes, we are going to start a new life in a new home."

Kame: "Yay, new home!"

Harry:" Mom, do you have a plan how to move forward?"

" Yes, Harry, I have a few things in mind. First, we need to find some new friends. Then, we'll figure out our next steps."

Megan: Do you think Dad will come to us frequently, since it is far away?

"I don't know, Megan. But I think Richard will come to you, if you want to meet him. I am sorry for putting all of you through this, but it had to happen sooner or later"

Sophie: Can we stop for a break soon? I need to stretch my legs.

"Sure thing, Sophie. We'll stop at the next rest area."

When we finally arrived in front our new home, which I had bought, it was raining. House is located close to the forest. We are greeted by lush greenery, mature trees, and a picturesque landscape. The house is a two-story building with a charming design that perfectly merge with the forest.

Nobody was waiting for us. My whole strength which I was clinging on to with my last bit of mental strength crashed down at that time. I whole heartedly cried due to desperation, loneliness and anger which was built on for last 5 years. Children had never seen me crying ever. They hugged me and cried with me. Harry of course, guided us to New home and settled us on the sofa.

Inside, the house is an open-concept layout that seamlessly connects the living, dining, and kitchen areas. The living room features large windows that let in plenty of natural light and provide stunning views of the surrounding forest. The five bedrooms in the house are all generously sized, providing plenty of space for rest and relaxation. Each bedroom has its own unique character, but they all share a cozy and welcoming atmosphere that is sure to feel right at home. Overall, it is a perfect place for peaceful and relaxing lifestyle surrounded by nature.

After few minutes I asked,

"Well, guys, we made it to our new home! What do you all think?"

Megan: "This is so cool! I can't wait to explore the woods."

Sophie: "It's better than I expected, I guess."

Keri:" I love it, Mommy! Can we go outside and play?"

Kame: Yeah, let's go explore!

"Of course, but make sure you stay close to the house, and don't wander too far into the woods. Well, first, we need to unpack and settle into our new home. Then, we'll figure out our next steps."

Megan: "Can we have a bonfire tonight and make s'mores?"

Sophie: That sounds like fun!

Keri: Yay, s'mores!

Kame: Yummy!

"Sure, we can do that. But first, let's get everything unpacked and settled in."

Then all of sudden

Megan cried "dibs on the biggest room"

And the war started. Megan and Sophie ran upstairs to pick a room. Kari and Kame runoff to back yard to look at the forest. Harry and I laughed. He had already picked rooms for them with the help of their fathers, designed and arranged their rooms according to their room in Seattle. They also put some surprises for them in their room.

I and Harry started to unpack and arrange the remaining things which we had brought along with us. We heard happy scream from both Sophie and Megan from upstairs. I think they found presents from their fathers. They run back down and hugged me and kissed me on the cheeks. They tried to do the same to Harry but he started to run away. Girls started to run behind him and twins heard the sound and joined. That moment, their happiness made this trip worthwhile at least for that moment.

Harry went outside to purchase some snacks and some vegetables in his own car and took twins with him. When they came back, I and Harry made dinner.

Me: "Hey kids, what are you up to?"

Megan: "We're trying to make a fire for the family, Mom."

Me: "That's great, but make sure you're being safe with it. We don't want to start any fires."

Megan:" I'm being careful, Mom. I'm only using small sticks and kindling."

Sophie:" Yeah, and we're making sure to keep the fire contained in the pit."

Kame:" Look, Mommy, a big wolf!"

Me: "What? Where?"

Kame: "Over there, Mommy, by the trees!"

Me: "Kame, be careful. Wolves are dangerous animals. We need to go back into the house and keep an eye out."

Harry: "Don't worry, Mom, we'll keep a close watch on the area."

Megan: "Yeah, and we won't make any more fires if it's going to be dangerous."

Sophie: "We can always have a fire inside if we want to, right Mom?"

Me: "Of course, Sophie. We have a fireplace in the living room for just that reason. Alright kids, it's time to put out the fire and come inside for dinner. Harry. I'll start getting them ready while you all help put out the fire."

Megan: "I'll go get the water bucket to pour over the fire."

Sophie: "And I'll use the shovel to spread the ashes around so they cool off."

Keri: "Mommy, can I help too?"

Me: "Of course, Keri. You can help me gather up the sticks and make sure we don't leave any trash behind."

Me: "Hey Kame, you mentioned seeing a wolf earlier. What did it look like?"

Kame: "It was big and black, with shiny fur and yellow eyes. It had pointy ears and sharp teeth."

Sophie: "That sounds scary!"

Me: "Kame, can you tell us more about the wolf you saw?"

Kame: "It was really fast and it disappeared into the forest quickly. But it was beautiful, like a creature from a fairytale."

Me: "That sounds like a fascinating experience, Kame. Just remember to stay away from wild animals, okay?"

After dinner, children and I watched some old scary movie together and went to sleep early. Sophie, Megan and twins came to room after some time to sleep with me.

Sophie: Mom, can you sing that lullaby you always sing to us?

Me: Of course, sweetie. Starts singing

"Hush-a-bye, don't you cry,

Go to sleep-y, my sweet Harry.

When you wake, you shall have

All the pretty little horses.

Blacks and bays, dapples and grays,

Coach and six-for my Megan.

Hush-a-bye, don't you cry,

Go to sleep-y, my Sophie.

Keri and Kame, my little twin boys,

Dream of horses and all their joys.

Hush-a-bye, don't you cry,

Go to sleep-y, my darlings, good night."

Megan: I love that song.

Keri: Me too, Mommy.

Kame: yawns I'm sleepy now.

Me: Alright, it's time for all of us to get some rest. Goodnight, my loves.

Sophie: Goodnight, Mom.

Megan: Goodnight.

Keri: Night night.

Kame: already half asleep Night, Mommy.

I hugged them and continue to sing the lullaby.