Chapter 1: The Story Starts

Have you ever wondered who could win a fight between Batman and Doomguy, believing that Batman would win for a plethora of reasons, only to find out that Bruce would end up losing, and badly at that?

Well, I had the courtesy of being the Doomguy, and let me tell you that I was not surprised at all by the outcome when it happened.

Yes, I'm the Doom Slayer. No, I don't have any other name, because it would not be important. No, seriously: I did not call me Flynn Taggart, not John Grimm, and not Stan Blazkowicz. I did not even take my previous name, the one I had before R.O.B. took me from my universe and chucked me here for his amusement, as my new'real' name, because I did not need it here.

And with this, I mean DC Comics. However, it was not a universe in particular, being a mishmash of several, especially the DCAU and the Arkham games.

Now, I'm only Doom Slayer, an honorary member of the Justice League, and, if what many people believe is true, the best thing that happened to Earth alongside the printing press, electricity, and Superman himself.

You must be wondering, though, how did I manage to get them to accept me, very possibly the last kind of 'hero' given that unlike them, I was more than willing to end lives and not as a last resort? And how did I become one of the most famous people in recorded history? Very possibly, you have many other questions: did you invariably change the history of the universe by intervening or even merely existing? Did you fight the hordes of hell alongside the League?

Did you adopt a rabbit?

It's a long, long story, which began the day I woke up in the 'bridge', for a lack of a better word, of the Fortress of Doom, sheathed in the Praetor Suit and overlooking an Earth that was neither covered in giant pentagrams nor sprawling ruins, but incidentally also lacking a good deal of satellites, space debris, and so on.

Confused, I stared around the room, still wondering what was happening, why wasn't I in my apartment, and believing this was merely a lucid dream from which I would wake up.

And then I gave the most fucked-up scream ever made in the history of screams when Vega finally spoke up to me.

"Good Morning Slayer"

"W-what the fuck?!" Yeah, not exactly a great beginning, ain't it? At least I didn't have the SSG in hand.

***

A/N: Yet another self-insertion where the SI is overpowered, but in a way that is not a power fantasy. I just realized that no one has thought of making this story before and wanted to give it a try.

I know, I know, a very short intro chapter, but don't worry; the next one will be at the very least twice as long, if the narrative and information are heavy.