Entry No. 4 - Loose Ends

Those friends I've made along my journey never last long. I moved many times as a child. It's not as though I've never had the means to keep in touch with my friends after a move, rather I forget that they even existed. That's the problem with my mind. It tries hard to bury any good memories I have. This leads to me having a graveyard of phone numbers for friends I guess I had. I went through my old phone and found one contact titled " Dawson - friend ". I guess that was my first sorry attempt at remembering a friend after I moved. The last time I moved I tried hard to talk and text my old friends. I was able to subdue the grounds keeper for a few months. They too were buried. However, I can recall their names. The grounds keep has gotten lazy over the years. I might finally break free from this memory that has the same reputation as the Bermuda Triangle. Why is this though? Why does my mind try so hard to keep me from happiness? Is this divine punishment? What could I have done? What God would punish someone without reason?