Conversations with Friends

"Why have you been avoiding me?" he asks, leaping high over the preamble and getting right to the meat of the conversation.

'Why would you not want me to?' I write to him as I fight the urge to escape. My hand unconsciously scratches at the massive scar, impossible to hide with makeup, across my face as Cedric moves closer with bafflement and a dash of anger.

"What does that even mean?" His shock over the answer overshadows the negative emotion I'm unable to read that larks in the corner of his face.

'I'm giving you a way out. Now you don't have to pretend to be nice or hang around a monster because I'll never be there,' My words take on a jagged edge to them in response to his irritation. Why is he angry?

Frustrated at the conversation, Cedric combs his hand through his hair, "That's not what I want."

'Really? Because the constant hints that you drop for Leanne to stop being around me and the looks you give me when I'm with her say otherwise,' My exit is cut short as he grabs my arm. The contact whips my mind back.

Fear takes the wheel as I spin around to slap his grip off my arm. Not even a second after my arm is free I jump back with my other arm cradling it. Shame and fear swirl in Cedrics face as he looks into the eyes of a cornered animal.

"I didn't mean to… Are you," He cuts his rambling to try to level himself, "Look. My feelings on you hanging out with Leanne haven't changed from what they were in the Hospital Wing. I assumed that you were an evil and bad person and didn't want Anne to have anything to do with you. I was wrong. I shouldn't have reacted like that and I hope we can still be friends."

I look at his extended hand and sincere grin with caution, 'You were right though. I'm a Part-Vampire who could kill Anne or you. Why would you want to be around me let alone friends with me?'

"You're smart, courageous, intelligent, quick-witted, and kind. You may be part-vampire but you're also a good person. I don't think you wouldn't kill anyone," Mild frustration meets the smooth plea in his voice.

'You haven't even known me for a month! How couldn't you possibly know who I am? I'm a monster who could rip your throat out if I wanted to.'

My penmanship starts to degrade as the sound of bone snapping continues to repeat in my mind like a broken record. Air starts to refuse my breath as every atom of my body wants to run like they're on a sinking ship. The fear rushing through me blocks his concerned stare from my mind as I start unconsciously scratching my face.

"Drink this," Cedric calls out as he throws a potion bottle. Even mid-panic attack, my vampiric stay strong as I grab it out of the air and down it like a party girl on New Year's Eve.

"Contrary to public opinion, I don't think vampires and werewolves are inherently evil. You put every ounce of your being to stop yourself from hurting others, you protected Anne when Malfoy was berating her, and you even treat House Elves with dignity and kindness. That's how I know you aren't evil."

Putting my mask back up, I take a second to ponder his words. His words seem to be true. Knowing what Anne's gushed about him he isn't the type of person that would break their word. And considering he prioritizes Anne he might be good to keep around if I ever get out of control and need to be put down.

'If I ever get out of control or attack someone, can you promise that you'll stop me? By any means necessary?' My words don't seem to register for a second like it's a vague concept he's never needed to think about.

He hesitates for a second to find the right words, "Not that that would never happen, but if it did, fine."

Satisfied by the ordeal, I turn to leave for the Library.

***

"Are you free this afternoon?" Hermione asks, not looking up from her book, breaking the warm silence of the Library.

'Sorry, I promised another friend that I'd hang out then,' Glancing up at my response, she rolls her eyes and exhales. Her response doesn't elicit emotion since I've used that excuse a few times to hide hospital wing visits and the like.

"What about tonight?" She asks, setting her book down.

Flipping through my mental calendar, I mutely gulp at the reminder I have nonverbal spell lessons. The air turns as thick as a battlefield as my gears turn to think of an excuse, 'One of the professors is insisting that I need to meet them to catch up on work that was from when I was in the Hospital Wing.'

"You were in the Hospital Wing? Why didn't you tell me?" Her voice raises slightly with anger and hurt. Why is she angry? I was the one in the hospital. I could have been dying for all she knows and yet her first reaction is anger?

'I thought you knew.'

"No, because, like always, you never told me!" Her anger gets more pronounced as the librarian gives us the death glare for being noisy.

'What's that supposed to-' My writing gets cut off as Professor Bathsheda Babbling comes up to us.

"Can I steal you for a second?" Her question brings me to a tug of war between Hermione and her.

Asking with my eyes, Hermione gives an impatient sigh and shoos me with her hand and an eye roll. My pleading expression at her response is quickly kicked by annoyance as I nod to Professor Babbling.

Grabbing my stuff, I follow her out of the room.