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a Harem to die for~

guy gets fucked by a transmigrating lightning bolt ( courtesy of yours truly ) and wakes up in world famous puzzle game: helltaker, i never was good at writing synopsises, or descriptions, fucking whatever

iamapsychopath · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
10 Chs

"flashback flashbangs"

taker, along with his harem: Pandemonica the tired demon, modeus the lustful demon, Cerberus the triple demon, malina the sour demon, zdrada the bitch demon, azazel the curious angel, justice the awesome demon, and finally lucifer the ceo of hell herself, Traversed the puzzle that stood between him and hells gate, meanwhile the girls all thought about what has happened in the past week, a human broke his way into hell, a place full of suffering and anguish, and made his way through lucifers puzzles, full of (usually) deadly spikes and undead slaves, just for a harem? The idea seemed stupid, in fact, a few of them have asked him several times if he was sure that was the only reason he was there, and every time he had practically given them the same answer.

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〔~Flashback: ch 1-2: Pandemonica pov~〕

As I was resting on the back of the man who showed up out of nowhere and asked me to join his harem, which was apparently his dream, it was a ridiculous dream, a ridiculous dream of an even more ridiculous man.

'He couldn't seriously have traveled to hell, specifically for a demon girl harem right?' I thought to myself, I couldn't answer that question, so I tapped on the shoulder my head wasn't resting on, he seemed surprised, i suppose he thought i was sleeping.

"Yes, pan?" He asked me, I was taken aback, the last time a soul had the nerve to call me by a nickname I broke every bone in their weak body, put them back together, repeating the process over and over until i was tired of them, however when he said it the only thing I felt was my core heat up and moisten, this man drove me crazy, I want him, I want to knock him out, drag him to my room, and force him to-

"You still there pan? If it's the nickname I'm sorry, I just thought you wouldn't mind"

...nevermind, he is to sweet to take advantage of, I'd rather wait till we were back at his home, if we make it out that is, molten rock isnt the best place for intercourse anyways.

"...no, it's alright, I was just... taken aback, anyways I had a question"

I could faintly hear taker sigh in relief, cute.

"Thank lucifer, anyways what did you want to ask me, pan?" He asked as he looked at me from the side with that cute smile on his face.

"...I was curious what you actually traveled to hell for"

He looks at me confused.

"Haven't I already told you? I'm here for a harem full of hot demon girls,"

I sighed.

"I'm not convinced, I simply can't believe you'd send yourself to hell, a place full of endless suffering, for no other reason than making a demon girl harem," I say while glaring at him, he merely smiled back, don't do that, you're gonna drive me crazy!

"Believe it or not that's all I came here for, I'm a selfish man with shallow wishes, its sad right?"

I just stare at him for a good minute before sighing and digging my head back into the crook of his neck before Mumbling "...Whatever, if that's all you want, it's my job to help you get it" i say nonchalantly, hoping taker wouldn't notice my smile and blush, however, i felt him chuckling to himself, to which I calmly responded with a sharp kick on the side, quickly silencing the laughter in the young man, or that's what should have happened, instead he just started laughing harder, and I found myself joining him, both of us laughing together

[End flashback]

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Pandemonica smiles to herself as she remembers all the absurd interactions she's had with the man she's come to love.

Meanwhile, modeus is having a similar experience

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〔♡Flashback: ch 2-3: modeus pov♡〕

It was only supposed to be a one-night stand, i would sneak in there, ride his massive dick like there was no tomorrow then id book it.

So what in the 9 circles am I doing?!

Looking up at the man's carefree smile as he carefully maneuvered us all through lady lucifers several puzzles i only grew more questions

How did this man even get down here? He didn't die obviously, and he didn't enter the gate, so how?!

And more importantly why?!

"... hey taker" I found myself calling out to him

"Yea, mody?" He responded, pandemonica the bitch quietly snoozing on his back

"Mody?" I ask, confused, taker shrugs

"A cute lil nickname I thought up for you, I can stop if you don't like it" taker said, i felt my face heat up, a nickname?! Only couples called each other that!

"Y-y-y-you pervert!" I hissed, my face hot, as I let go of his arm and cover my face, taker looked at me worried as he held up his hands

"Whoawhoawhoa, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'll stop calling you that!" Taker said quickly, however I found myself not liking that idea

"No!" I yell, taker jumping in surprise once again

"So.... I CAN call you mody... right?" He asks an unsure tone, I slowly nod my head, looking anywhere but his face

"Haha! Ah thank lucifer, thought I struck a nerve or something, anyways, What'd you want to ask me?" Taker asked, reminding me of my previous concerns

"Oh, I was simply curious, why did you travel down here, I doubt it was actually just for demon girls" I ask, taker just chuckles and shakes his head

"You're not gonna believe this..."

[End flashback]

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Modeus looks at the back of the man who earned not only her lust but also her love

As modeus continues to fantasize about her and helltaker, Cerberus joins in on the flashback party

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〔≡Flashback: ch3-4: cerberus pov≡〕

It was a normal day, we were guarding the gates to hell diligently like lucifer asked until some mean undead slaves distracted us and lured us away, after we dealt with them and actually we were lost, we caught a scent we barely recognized, human! A real mortal human!

Only the recently passed souls that we played with had a small scent on them from recently passing , but not this one, they were practically bathed in it! So we waited until the smell got close to the gate we did not accidentally trap ourselves behind, but it was so boring just sitting in one spot and waiting so we eventually fell asleep, only to be woken up by the sound of the gate being smashed in, we immediately jumped up, thinking that maybe a stray appeared and tried to cause trouble, but instead the source wasthe scent we were waiting for! the moment we realized who it was, we bounded up and into his chest, eagerly trying to knock him over so we could consume his scent, but instead he stood tall, stronger then the walls of lucifers castle.

ever since then we've been traveling with him, eating his delicious food, basking in his loving head pats, and playing with him, he never tried to run like the others or showed even the slightest bit of fatigue, me and the other two girls he had with him were always confused about that last bit, hells lowest temperature is 100°C to ensure the souls down here constantly suffer, even when judgment is taking a day of or is busy, but here he was, kicking boulders, and crushing the undead slaves, sometimes even with Pandemonica resting on his back!

Our human sure is strange.

[End flashback]

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As Cerberus is pondering to herself, something she rarely did, about the possible supernatural abilities the person she's silently claimed as her mate may have, Malina and zdrada think about how they both met the taker.

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[–~Flashback: ch 4: malina and zdrada–~]

They had practically met him the same time, the human that Malina heard rumors about had suddenly arrived at her doorstep, she was blackout drunk, and not mentally prepared, so she accepted his silly offer, immediately regretting it the next morning, she was scared, the man was gone and there was clanging in her kitchen, she had planned to kick him out the next day, but he surprised her, he woke up early just to make them all pancakes, even knocked her sister down a peg or two, maybe he wasn't as bad as she thought he was, and that thought was only confirmed when he pulled her to the side before they left.

"Hey Malina" the man who was surprisingly intimidating for his stature, called out to Malina.

I froze up and turned to him, glaring slightly to try and intimate him, it didnt seem to work though.

"Yea? You need something?" I grumbled

He placed a hand on my shoulder which caused me to jump at the sudden contact, I was about to tell him to fuck off before I saw him looking at me with worried eyes

"Are you sure you wanna Tag along with us? No offense but you didn't look like you were in any position to decide anything yesterday, if you want, we can just leave"

I was taken aback by his sudden kindness, most of the souls that End up down here are usually malicious and look at me with poorly hidden desire, I guess I accidentally grouped him in with the souls that ended up down here, but still, I doubt many humans are much better, not many people go out of their way to be kind, yet he's done just that several times over, from cooking breakfast, To stopping me and my sister from fighting, and even asking i now if i wanted them to go.

After a few seconds of thinking to myself, i decided.

"No... I think I'll stay, i can't let my sister hurt my only ticket to a gaming buddy"

Taker softly smiled at me and chuckled.

"Ok then, just tell me if you have any problems, now let's get back to the others," taker said as he took my hand.

/

On the other side, zdrada planned on 'joining' takers, (or helltaker in this instance, as that's what the rumors called him) Harem so she could hitch a ride to lucifers castle to stock up on cigarettes, in fact that's why she was at malinas, she was heading there to grab the last pack she had, but she was surprised when the door was answered by the human she had heard about, she tried messing with him to get a rise out of him, but he took anything she threw at him and returned the favor twice over.

That's how she got her second objective, find a way to get under his skin, she tried very hard to bother or annoy him, but he always twisted her words and teased the hell out of her, it pissed her off to no end, but secretly, zdrada started to like how taker complimented her so much, she even forgot to grab the smokes from Malina, but even then, he gave her some smokes, yea, apparently he smoked once upon a time, zdrada wondered if he would smoke with her.

[End flashback]

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Malina and Zdrada thought about the man that suddenly showed up and their lives and treated them with so much unconditional love.

Meanwhile, Azazel reads over her notes while thinking about the anomaly of the human that entered and traversed hell mostly by himself without so much as breaking a sweat.

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[Flashback: ch 6-7: Azazel pov]

I was writing down notes on the three tablet pieces lying in front of me that I had recently uncovered as I contemplate the rumors I heard from a few passing undead slaves.

'A human in hell who is gathering a demon girl harem? Pfft, ridiculous! The moment a mortal even steps a foot into hells gate, heaven is notified or Cerberus tears them apar-'

*BOOM*

Azazel's thought process wss cut off by something massive being kicked, however she just ignored it, until the golden gate that blocked her exploration in hell simply evaporated, and standing behind that gate, was the human everyone talked about.

[End flashback

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Azazels curiosity skyrocketed as she began to think up multiple theories on how he managed to enter hell, why are all the demon's not tearing into his soul?

How is he strong enough to launch the boulders with one punch to shatter the slaves? She had even joined the man's harem to research him, and sooner rather than later, she had more notes on him, his physiology, his powers, the size of his di-...  or how his willpower isn't torn apart by the spikes, and after that, the notebook basically became a diary (as much as she denied that claim).

As our clueless angel continued theorizing, hell's former high prosecutor  Justice was just being cool while thinking about the nice man she recently met.

Justices pov(no flashback)

As Taker pushes another rock and sighs in exasperation I look in his direction from his side, our hands are still interlocked even if I told him I could navigate just fine, it's a nice change of pace, when I was high prosecutor most people avoided me but he was purposefully going out of his way to help me.

"Hey, taker?"

He stops for a second, I assume he looks at me

"Yes, ice?"

I raised an eyebrow at that

"Ice?"

He chuckles at me

"Yea, it's a nickname I came up for you, after all, Justice served cold is just ice, I can stop though if you want me to"

I chuckle at that

"I like it! You can call me that"

He squeezes my hand, kissing my cheek, cute.

"If it's ok with you ice"

I smile as I grab his chin and pull him into a real kiss.

"Whoa-! Mmph!"

He didn't struggle much aside from trying to heighten himself to not make me lean over much, heh, even when I'm stealing his breath for a whole minute and a half he still does not let up, eventually I pulled away to let him catch his breath.

After a few minutes of leaning on me, taker picked himself up. I suddenly felt a massive wave of malicious intent and burning stares but I know that it was just the rest of his girls and he does as well, he patted my leg and walked toward the others, I had a bad feeling but it was quelled by him whispering to me

'I'll be fine ice'

For the next few minutes, I rested on a nearby Boulder I managed to make my way to and listened to moans from the other girls, Azazel violently scribbling on her notepad, which was also eventually shut up by the taker going over and extending the love, a few light slaps, and even a cigarette going out accompanied the sound of sizzling flesh, I winced at that last one and the girls were furious, but he was quick to calm them, and then finally he made his way back to me.

The girls closely followed behind him this time.

"Ok, I'm done ice, oh and Cerberus found the key! So let's get out of here"

I grin as I walk back over to his side, or I tried to, but three bodies quickly tackle my arms and waist.

"No!"

"You don't get to hold master anymore, cheater!"

"Ye-!"

Suddenly a murderous aura washes over all of them

And they look over to see Justice isn't wearing her usual smile, but instead a blank expression, slowly the area around them chilled, literally, as a layer of frost spread, taker hissed as some frost covered his arms.

the aura and frost dissipated as fast as it appeared as Justice just shrugged her shoulders.

"Ok I guess, but I'm kinda walking in the dark here"

Suddenly, y/n intervenes, placing a hand on Cerberus' head, taming them.

"It's alright girls, we're a family, besides, I was the one who kissed her"

The girls just stare at Justice a little long before shrugging and letting her wrap her arm around his shoulder, but modeus attached herself to his other arm, Burying between her breasts, and Cerberus also found some good spots on his back.

Y/n just smiled fondly as he placed the key Cerberus found into the gate and walked in.

*CLA-CHINK* *SHINK*

...but that smile was quickly replaced by rattling chains.

2743 words, blah blah blah, rate the chapter, blah blah blah, outa 13

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