Comments of chapter undefined of Inhuman Sorcerer in The MCU
Inhuman Sorcerer in The MCU
MorTemTK
Chapter comments15
I don't get it, did they really believe they are doing a good thing by kidnapping kids from their parents? Are they mentally ill? Also, please try to cut out some of the descriptions. I've noticed this as a common problem in novels with ai involved, even when it's just editing. The ai tends to add far too many descriptions like how people are filled with determination (that alone is mentioned too many times in this chapter), or outright stating the emotions or "loyalty" displayed by a character. To put it bluntly, the ai is terrible at "Show, Don't Tell." Instead of saying someone is filled with determination, let their actions do the talking. Instead of saying someone's eyes or mind were filled with fear, show it, such as simply stating the person "trembled." To put things simply, you need to be less explicit, more implicit. Let the readers have some room for their imagination. A person can tremble for many reasons, but you know exactly what they are feeling if you just tell it straight, and that's not good when most of the content is like that.
I haven't watched more than a couple episodes of Agents of SHIELD, so not sure how much they explained away the event. It's just a bit confusing that he has no reaction to the woman calling him her child, yet acts as if he is doing the right thing with no doubt. It's as if he can't even hear her. If he did, he should at least feel some doubt about his actions, even if he thinks it's the better action. Anyway, it's not super important. It just feels like something is off when reading the chapter.
MorTemTK:Thanks for the advice, also, would you leave a child with parent who had just committed a massacre of the entire village? I’m just using the same logic they used in the show. I’ll try cut out more of the descriptive writing 👍
