Comments of chapter undefined of OLD-WORLD EXTRA
OLD-WORLD EXTRA
GoldenStache
Chapter comments6
This chapter feels like walking in a dusty ruin of a mall with a high tech suit and rifle at hand. Perhaps for more eeary atmosphere and suspense you could add some debris and building degradatio.
Yes, but half way in the chapter you stopped and after a while it feels not as tense and a bit relaxed. So, erhaps you should continue even with just a sentence here and there.
GoldenStache:I did add some of that in at the start. The flickering holograms, the random hunters, and all of that was to make it suspenseful, like a gradual, slow walk until the big boom where Emir's brain is under attack.
Yeah, you nailed the suspense đ This giant, quiet relic of the past is giving me the creeps. I am just sad that reading with my eyes closed doesnât work and I gotta face whatâs coming up
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GoldenStache
