Comments of chapter undefined of Being Sent to the Shadow Realm and Forced to Experience the Multiverse
Being Sent to the Shadow Realm and Forced to Experience the Multiverse
Dante_Hellscythe
Chapter comments5
Cecil_2005Lv4Cecil_2005
I'm talking from my aesthetic perspective. Throughout chapter 1, I notice that almost every paragraph is just a sentence. Ideally, you would want 'subject + verb' 2-3 times atmost in a sentence. Your structure is fine, it's just my aesthetic sense, no fault on your own.
Cecil_2005Lv4Cecil_2005
You can just write in your usual style. When you finish, you can go over the chapter and split the sentences. It will be less distracting this way.
Dante_Hellscythe:Ok, I can try this. Not sure if it will work nicely, but even if I fail it doesn't mean everything will be in vain. Albeit this way is somehow distracting, maybe because I'm thinking even more and my limited amount of brain cells is struggling. Something like this?