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Comments of chapter undefined of Being Sent to the Shadow Realm and Forced to Experience the Multiverse

Cecil_2005
Cecil_2005Lv4Cecil_2005

I'm talking from my aesthetic perspective. Throughout chapter 1, I notice that almost every paragraph is just a sentence. Ideally, you would want 'subject + verb' 2-3 times atmost in a sentence. Your structure is fine, it's just my aesthetic sense, no fault on your own.

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Cecil_2005
Cecil_2005Lv4Cecil_2005

Ah, what I meant "subject + verb" is a combination of subject and verb. Subjects are: I, you, he, it, etc... verbs are actions that go along with subject. A clause is basically "subject+verb". An example of a clause is "I am a lazy human being". One sentence can has many clauses: "Even if all I'm playing is a non-meta Aromage deck, it's doesn't feel good to lose to something like this". The 2 clauses are often separated by commas, similar to the example. Then there's fitting as many clauses as you can into a sentence. "Limiter Removal is a completely fine card to be played, IF you play any machine deck, and a machine deck is not what he play, in fact the only machine he summoned was Borreload, this means that card is a brick 98% of the time!" This paragraph has 5 clauses in a sentence. Ideally, a sentence should contain 2, maybe 3 clauses. However, if there are 4 clauses you might as well split them. Here the same paragraph with split sentences. "Limiter Removal is a completely fine card to be played. IF you play any machine deck, and a machine deck is not what he play. In fact the only machine he summoned was Borreload, this means that card is a brick 98% of the time!"

Dante_Hellscythe:So, my way is actually fine? Because honestly, I have no idea how to change stuff into *subject + verb.*