Comments of chapter undefined of I Become Invincible By Signing In
I Become Invincible By Signing In
Sweet Brand Chewtoy
Chapter comments29
Two very stupid decisions here: First, should not have shown the truth about the wife so soon. hint at it, sure, but let us be confused and angry at her for a while. Second, it was very dumb to introduce a transmigration plot into this. It is not just completely and utterly pointless but also an active detriment to the story because it severs the protagonist from his own past, creating a disconnect between the protag and Wang Yi's emotions, grudges and attachments. With this decision alone you have neutered all of the emotional weight that you established at the start. Even if you try to establish that Wang Wei shares all of Wang Yi's attachments, it's not the same because it's still not the same person. Alternatively, you could have just introduced the system here and shoved in some BS about how he was chosen by the system because he is uniquely qualified in some way, perhaps he naturally has an extremely strong soul or something. Regardless, with the two bad decisions you have made in the first chapter alone you have ruined any potential your novel had in ways that are extremely easy to fix.
