Comments of chapter undefined of Incubus' Blood Harem
Incubus' Blood Harem
BrewingFantasies
Chapter comments27
Sinful_CyanideLv15Sinful_Cyanide
Helldragon_xdLv1Helldragon_xd
Although the premise established is very interesting, and there's the theme of the underdog rising to the heavens, I found some grammatical mistakes such as run-on sentences. A easy way to fix this is to seperate the contents into different sentences, and then formatting multiple paragraphs, or double check some comma placements to fix the flow of the writing. In terms of world-building and how the characters are, it is very interesting to have a glimpse into a world of monsters as well as the different personalities. Only needs some polishing and I think the hook is set up well to bring in new readers.
