Engaging narrative, but the chapter could do with some extensive edits for grammar. I started off going through the grammatical errors paragraph by paragraph, but they were so plentiful, in order to actually read the full chapter, I had to just ignore said errors and charge through.
I see a bucket of sweat spent in this exposition. New authors nowadays wouldn't even try to put you in the setting. It's refreshing to see the art of exposition still alive.
