Comments of chapter undefined of Different Shots
Different Shots
Hana_Tamer
Chapter comments4
Brian_Hanes_117Lv1Brian_Hanes_117
This is an interesting story. The grammar is a bit off though. It seems like you didn't put every statement in quotation marks and the way you phrased a couple of statements was odd. So I would recommend you work on that, but the character is interesting.
Hana_TamerAuthorHana_Tamer
The story is supposed to be mystery so this gives it a good vibe sometimes But yes you are right there is some mistakes and i need to correct them
Brian_Hanes_117:And I get that strangeness is part of the story and also might reflect the culture of the students. But some of the sentences in the first page and phrased in a way that is unclear. Even compared to some of the other statements.