Good story
but your patreon is extremely costly.
Please have a look at other creators, especially creators that have high ranked work in fanfiction category and then decide the pricing of your work on patreon.
I agree with this guy, author. It may seem like you would be earning a lot with 40 bucks, but how many actually buy that?
If you reduce the price by half, you'll probably more than double your patreons. And if you reduce it further, it won't just be another double or triple.