You are doing well, I can more or less get what you trying to convey form your writing but not all readers have the patience to understand the words. Try to flesh out the Mc's thoughts and emotions a bit. A sentence here and there. Trust me, it will work wonders. As for the progress of strength I am satisfied. The bashing is that Mc just made a Omake joke while Sheild assaulted him and made him uncounsiouss and literally tried to steal Omnitrix. So without, Ben's thoughts on matter, the scene will look he is a pushover.
Shane_Delgado_03
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