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Review Detail of esportairbud in When a communist reincarnates

Review detail

esportairbud
esportairbudLv47mthesportairbud

obv this book only has one chapter so far, and it's not really possible to review it fairly on the categories listed above. I'll update my review later as the story develops. I want to encourage the writer while offering advice. The first chapter has too many major events in the life of the MC happening too soon. Let us get to know him as a person, so we care what happens to him when it does happen. If you want to write a fast paced story, start in the middle of such a major event and let us learn who the MC is through their actions and perception. Also the world needs more description. Don't settle for "the apartment was on fire." Go for something more poetic like:"The walk home should have been boring, the same as always. That gray stray cat should have been begging for a piece of dried fish from his leftovers. Old man Tom should have been smoking and scowling at whatever used appliance he was dismantling on his balcony. He should have smelled the bitter scent of roasting coffee beans at Café Chartreuse, a popular spot for overpriced coffee and free wifi. If he was not so absorbed in his phone he would have noticed. None of these familiar landmarks of his commute were present today.A tall plume of black smoke rose in a windless sky. It was coming from his apartment."

When a communist reincarnates

Daoist4dvt3y

Liked it!

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