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Review Detail of Ornoth in Erotic RPG: I am in the Game world, But My Heroines are Villainesses

Review detail

Ornoth
OrnothLv139mthOrnoth

The story has potential. Unfortunately the Author doesn't know how to unearth that. It has way too many inconsistencies it's getting annoying.

altalt

Erotic RPG: I am in the Game world, But My Heroines are Villainesses

Darkness_Enjoyer

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Replies24

Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

I legit hate it when people only read the first ten chapters and give a review about a story that has yet to bloom and show its good points. I also don't like the fact that people seem to think a person should always think in the same line that never changes. Because in the beginning, his two souls got merged, MC didn't even have the time to think and feel the emotions that might trigger as time goes because of some words, and I wanted to show that a person's thoughts wouldn't be stable the moment they transmigrated because IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. Legit, I think most people don't want a human but a robot as MC nowadays. Anyway, I won't delete this review and even pin it. For those who want an MC whose thoughts never change, please don't read my book and look for others.

SnackFu
SnackFuLv4SnackFu

u are only pointing out the major inconsistency not the minor ones like getting bloodthorn herb from kitchen and then saying that blood thorn herbs are very rare with 9 star beast guarding it? also when he confronts noah to talk to him how did he suddenly get commoner clothes? also the charm it was 9.9 but suddenly became 5.5 tho i dont know if u forgot about this part or is it really part of the plot

Darkness_Enjoyer:I legit hate it when people only read the first ten chapters and give a review about a story that has yet to bloom and show its good points. I also don't like the fact that people seem to think a person should always think in the same line that never changes. Because in the beginning, his two souls got merged, MC didn't even have the time to think and feel the emotions that might trigger as time goes because of some words, and I wanted to show that a person's thoughts wouldn't be stable the moment they transmigrated because IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. Legit, I think most people don't want a human but a robot as MC nowadays. Anyway, I won't delete this review and even pin it. For those who want an MC whose thoughts never change, please don't read my book and look for others.
Ornoth
OrnothLv13Ornoth

Since you decided to pin me here, I'm gonna list all the Inconsistencies I encounter on this novel ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ In this paragraph you said to kill your own emotions. "Then, how does one become a unique existence? How can you become different than any other person you will encounter? How can you prove you are better and that you are a person who stands on the ground above? The answer is pretty simple. It is to kill your own emotions that always chain you to achieve greater lengths." Then next you said this ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ "In other words, a person who gets excited in front of the mountain would need to cross. That is the kind of person who would become great in the future, at least for me." How can you imply that to get stronger you need to kill emotion, yet the next paragraph you need to be 'excited' to become strong ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Darkness_Enjoyer:I legit hate it when people only read the first ten chapters and give a review about a story that has yet to bloom and show its good points. I also don't like the fact that people seem to think a person should always think in the same line that never changes. Because in the beginning, his two souls got merged, MC didn't even have the time to think and feel the emotions that might trigger as time goes because of some words, and I wanted to show that a person's thoughts wouldn't be stable the moment they transmigrated because IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. Legit, I think most people don't want a human but a robot as MC nowadays. Anyway, I won't delete this review and even pin it. For those who want an MC whose thoughts never change, please don't read my book and look for others.
Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

That is exactly how you think when you watch a video and get excited without not seeing or living the situation at all. The MC in my novel is not someone who is always true; he makes mistakes just like he did in this part. Just because the MC said something or thought something doesn't mean it will be like that. We are all humans, and in the end, even you or I can become inconsistent. That is what makes the main character human, not some sort of robot whose thoughts always match another and never clash with himself.

Ornoth:Since you decided to pin me here, I'm gonna list all the Inconsistencies I encounter on this novel ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ In this paragraph you said to kill your own emotions. "Then, how does one become a unique existence? How can you become different than any other person you will encounter? How can you prove you are better and that you are a person who stands on the ground above? The answer is pretty simple. It is to kill your own emotions that always chain you to achieve greater lengths." Then next you said this ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ "In other words, a person who gets excited in front of the mountain would need to cross. That is the kind of person who would become great in the future, at least for me." How can you imply that to get stronger you need to kill emotion, yet the next paragraph you need to be 'excited' to become strong ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

For this, I will review the chapters of the first volume and try to fix those details. At that time, I was just excitedly writing chapters that I didn't even pay much attention to them.

SnackFu:u are only pointing out the major inconsistency not the minor ones like getting bloodthorn herb from kitchen and then saying that blood thorn herbs are very rare with 9 star beast guarding it? also when he confronts noah to talk to him how did he suddenly get commoner clothes? also the charm it was 9.9 but suddenly became 5.5 tho i dont know if u forgot about this part or is it really part of the plot
Ornoth
OrnothLv13Ornoth

Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Since the day you discovered the word 'Albiet', you overused it as if your life depended on it.

Darkness_Enjoyer:For this, I will review the chapters of the first volume and try to fix those details. At that time, I was just excitedly writing chapters that I didn't even pay much attention to them.
Ornoth
OrnothLv13Ornoth

Yeah right, because the MC advocating to kill his emotions will DEFINITELY not turn him into a Doll ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Darkness_Enjoyer:That is exactly how you think when you watch a video and get excited without not seeing or living the situation at all. The MC in my novel is not someone who is always true; he makes mistakes just like he did in this part. Just because the MC said something or thought something doesn't mean it will be like that. We are all humans, and in the end, even you or I can become inconsistent. That is what makes the main character human, not some sort of robot whose thoughts always match another and never clash with himself.
Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

There is no need to refute this shortcoming; neither am I trying to cover it. This was one of the things I needed to change and fix, which I will do after my school semester ends.

Ornoth:Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Albiet Since the day you discovered the word 'Albiet', you overused it as if your life depended on it.
Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

As I previously mentioned, he is not a mere doll. He is capable of experiencing anger, possessing a conscience, and forming attachments. It's important to note that just because he may have said something in the heat of the moment, it doesn't necessarily reflect his true nature - something that should already be evident. While I don't claim that my novel is flawless, I do strive to correct any errors that are brought to my attention. However, I do differ in opinion from others who believe he is inconsistent - that's the crux of the matter..

Ornoth:Yeah right, because the MC advocating to kill his emotions will DEFINITELY not turn him into a Doll ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
Josh_Mendoz
Josh_MendozLv13Josh_Mendoz

Frankly I donโ€™t mind the small inconsistencies. Itโ€™s the plot holes that get to me. I get what ur getting at tho. Hated when mcs would say things like he would do this, go there or make all kinds of promises only for it to be forgotten. I swear some authors donโ€™t keep track of what they write. Like if they wrote something like โ€œI should go there after this,โ€ they should write it down somewhere. And yes character development is a thing so they wonโ€™t remain the same and Im cool with that when itโ€™s in a good direction. Shadow slave is a good example of that. loved how he was the first 500 chapter not so much after.

Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

Shadow Slave is the best that is ongoing on this platform, so no wonder.

Josh_Mendoz:Frankly I donโ€™t mind the small inconsistencies. Itโ€™s the plot holes that get to me. I get what ur getting at tho. Hated when mcs would say things like he would do this, go there or make all kinds of promises only for it to be forgotten. I swear some authors donโ€™t keep track of what they write. Like if they wrote something like โ€œI should go there after this,โ€ they should write it down somewhere. And yes character development is a thing so they wonโ€™t remain the same and Im cool with that when itโ€™s in a good direction. Shadow slave is a good example of that. loved how he was the first 500 chapter not so much after.
ssenialliv
sseniallivLv13ssenialliv

Me watching the comments:

BLACK_GLOOM
BLACK_GLOOMLv4BLACK_GLOOM

ssenialliv:Me watching the comments:
image
ELDER_LICH01
ELDER_LICH01Lv4ELDER_LICH01

hey author why i am thinking ur r trying to paint all the original mc character as bad people.

Darkness_Enjoyer
Darkness_EnjoyerAuthorDarkness_Enjoyer

No people are angels; even Callius himself is not a good person. Though, of course, I don't want an MC that just kills random people, so I need to give reasons for the main cast to show themselves as enemies.

ELDER_LICH01:hey author why i am thinking ur r trying to paint all the original mc character as bad people.
ELDER_LICH01
ELDER_LICH01Lv4ELDER_LICH01

bro the first villainnes story was she controlled or blackmailed everyone in orginal story and for mc pov she was right so what is wrong about mc step mother to do the same thing or the mc fiancee

Darkness_Enjoyer:No people are angels; even Callius himself is not a good person. Though, of course, I don't want an MC that just kills random people, so I need to give reasons for the main cast to show themselves as enemies.
Chronischen
ChronischenLv15Chronischen

As long as you strive to improve, and it sounds like you are, it is worth at least looking into. Nobody starts with a Lord of the Mysteries! Keep improving and I am sure it will be memorable.

Darkness_Enjoyer:Shadow Slave is the best that is ongoing on this platform, so no wonder.
Mr_hypocrite
Mr_hypocriteLv4Mr_hypocrite

is it ntr

Josh_Mendoz
Josh_MendozLv13Josh_Mendoz

Donโ€™t worry the story is good just wish there were more chapters โ˜บ๏ธ

Darkness_Enjoyer:I legit hate it when people only read the first ten chapters and give a review about a story that has yet to bloom and show its good points. I also don't like the fact that people seem to think a person should always think in the same line that never changes. Because in the beginning, his two souls got merged, MC didn't even have the time to think and feel the emotions that might trigger as time goes because of some words, and I wanted to show that a person's thoughts wouldn't be stable the moment they transmigrated because IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. Legit, I think most people don't want a human but a robot as MC nowadays. Anyway, I won't delete this review and even pin it. For those who want an MC whose thoughts never change, please don't read my book and look for others.
Josh_Mendoz
Josh_MendozLv13Josh_Mendoz

Actually read it when there was only about 300 chapters and used it as an example not cause itโ€™s the most popular but cause of his character development. Can list others but this one in my opinion is one of the more obvious ones. Stopped reading when he reavled everything gonna wait until there is 1000+ chapters

Darkness_Enjoyer:Shadow Slave is the best that is ongoing on this platform, so no wonder.