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Review Detail of OnizukaShinu in In danmachi as a vampire

Review detail

OnizukaShinu
OnizukaShinuLv41yrOnizukaShinu

It has great potential yet the author blew it with his overused grammar and perspective changes. The mc’s dialogue was unrealistically obnoxious, heck, delirious. It’s plain and generic, I would understand the mistakes since you’re new. I reccomend you to not do those ”author’s pov” or “scene change” just stick to one perspective and other ways for scene change by all creative means, since it’s sickening. I hope you understand and have a good life.

In danmachi as a vampire

Alexander_sama15

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Alexander_sama15
Alexander_sama15AuthorAlexander_sama15

Noted, have a nice day too 👍