Review Detail of Ibakedmypotatoes in Regression: Dimensional Chat Group

Disregarding the chaotic exchanges between characters, I do believe you're wasting the ability of a third-person viewpoint. You could have written some more narration. How does the character feel when they typed those words in the chat group? You never explained it as if everything is just a movie script that purposely cut off all narration since the director will just tell the actors directly about how their expression should be when they deliver such lines. You could've gone like: In the world of ninja, Kakashi frowned his eyes when he read such lines. He pondered the thoughts for a while before he finally touched the screen and, while being surprised a little by the strange device, goes along with the flow to send a message; [Copy Ninja: Is this a ninjutsu?] But no, you just had to make it seem like an actual chat log. Readers will find it hard to figure out what those characters are actually feeling by that point. But really, who am I to judge free stuff? I'm neither power pay you stones nor money to read the damn thing. So I won't complain, and instead, give you some pointers. And here's your first pointer: If this is a fanfiction, you would want to either brand it "fanfiction" instead of "Novel" or put a disclaimer saying One piece, Naruto, MCU is not yours. This is important, or else you're going to get into some trouble in the future. PS: You're free to delete this review. I know how important a good review is for an author. More importantly, you read my review and take it to your advantage.