the writing is weird the dialogues are too short the characters' relationships are too forced and there are a lot of things the original characters wouldn't do
seems like something i would do...
rookies make this kind of mistake often, im not trying to say that you should ignore it but if you read this expect this kind of thing, at least until i rewrite it someday...
i think that 'someday' i said before came faster than expected...
Read the rewritten chapters and tell me if you still think the same
Your review actually made me focus more on the dialogues on the rewrite, so .[img=recommend]