Review Detail of Primal_Warrior in I am Invincible in DragonBall

You really need to go over everything and reread. I made some small comments but there are way too many errors and run ons. Read it out loud if you have to. It needs work. Also its very jumbled doesnt really make it easy to read while were jumping from point to point. Feels like were reading a bullet point instead of a story. I hope that ypu reread it and edit it. While expanding a bit more on world building. You have some slight potiential here but your shooting yourself in the leg. Just take your time and reread before posting. You can save yourself a lot of time and effort just by rereading.