webnovel
avatar

Review Detail of Spelloyal in To be a leader

Review detail

Spelloyal
SpelloyalLv112yrSpelloyal

(google translated) Great idea, unfortunately the execution was terrible. Here we have a fanfic with some big problems that force me to do only 1 star, even though I'm someone who loves Fate, genterbent and female MC. Really huge and glaring problems. 1- Right at the beginning, genderbent was very forced. It just changed and that's it, even with "god" and that spoils the genre. Also the MC choosing to spin the roulette was very stupid as it could fall on a character like Taiga, Issei, Shinji or another normal human. Other than that, we have Servants and Magus with varying power levels, it's kind of ridiculous to take a chance when you could have chosen. It would make more sense for the MC to choose to be Saber but forget to specify the male version (Proto Saber), or just have the option to choose an anime to spin the character wheel, basically there are several better ways to do this. 2- Who the hell would choose to be summoned as a Servant subordinate to a master who can force you into 3 absolute orders instead of as a hero or simply mmaterialize independently when you could have wanted to. The MC didn't even choose who would summon him, it was Naofumi in luck. In a more realistic scenario where the world doesn't perfectly follow the MC's wishes even without him bothering to make the wish, it could easily have been a fat nobleman summoning him who would use a command seal to rape him. 3- We have basic mistakes like Saber dematerializing, when she is actually incapable of it. 4- Following the canon when changing events is OK (although it is not recommended to follow too much because it risks becoming just another generic fanfic in the sea of ​​fanfics), but copying the canon is inadmissible. The story basically follows canon without any divergence, the same events all with the same results despite Saber's presence. With all these big issues that are really basic and rarely seen even in fanfics by newbie authors, I have no choice but to give 1 star even though I like the idea of ​​Saber in Shield Hero.

altalt

To be a leader

Cyanta

Liked it!

LIKE

Replies4

Cyanta
CyantaAuthorCyanta

thanks for the read ig, if it isn't your cup of tea, you do you

Cyanta
CyantaAuthorCyanta

and it's a fanfic, ir doesn't need to be realistic, and some fanfics to follow a character who hasn't changed any of the events and the timeline so saying it is "inadmissible" is just you using the harshest way possible to go after the way I have written, I thank you for some of your comments but some of them are plane rude

Spelloyal
SpelloyalLv11Spelloyal

I'm sorry for being rude, I get carried away very easily when writing reviews. I could have said it more politely. But by being realistic, I mean characters making a little more thoughtful decisions. No one would leave their entire future to chance when they could easily lower the risks without effort. Even if the mc wanted to spin a roulette he could at least have excluded normal humans and weaker Magus for example.

Cyanta:and it's a fanfic, ir doesn't need to be realistic, and some fanfics to follow a character who hasn't changed any of the events and the timeline so saying it is "inadmissible" is just you using the harshest way possible to go after the way I have written, I thank you for some of your comments but some of them are plane rude
Cyanta
CyantaAuthorCyanta

it's just plot, like everything doesn't need to be explained yk

Spelloyal:I'm sorry for being rude, I get carried away very easily when writing reviews. I could have said it more politely. But by being realistic, I mean characters making a little more thoughtful decisions. No one would leave their entire future to chance when they could easily lower the risks without effort. Even if the mc wanted to spin a roulette he could at least have excluded normal humans and weaker Magus for example.