Review Detail of Bobsta in My Gacha System

This is my first story but I've been reading books and novels from when I was 6 so I sincerely hope that I have enough experience to know what a not terrible novel is. If there are grammar or spelling mistakes fell free to point them out and I will fix them; also if there are plot holes I will revise a couple chapters to make it fit, and if it's major I will rewrite that part entirely. Thank you and please be respectful.