Review Detail of slaktarfisken in The Demon Monarch System
Review detail
This is a fascinating, fast-paced story, although the rapid pace, at times, feels detrimental to the storyline. The language is well written and, compared to other novels, a joy to read, but also there are some problems with the choice of wordings and pacing in writing itself. Although they are not faulty per se, they get noticed a lot (in quant), at least if you bulk read the story from the beginning until the current date. I will not go too much into detail on that particular problem, but nevertheless, be that as it may, it goes without saying! WHAT FOLLOWS BELOW CAN SPOIL PROCEED AT YOUR OWN PERIL FOR I WILL NOT SUFFER FROM YOUR IRA My most significant issue with this story is that it, at times, does not let itself take time; I feel there are a lot of missed opportunities scattered around the story. One of the greatest so far is not utilizing Apollo's status as a disciplinary member. It has only come upon two separate occasions. First, I the arc where he got the seat. And when he got chastised for fighting a guy looking for trouble, which in my opinion, should be his job as a disciplinary member. Nevertheless, be that as it may, it goes without saying! And my biggest problem with the writing is the tempo of the writing. At long times there is no pause. Every paragraph continues the next one with connecting phrases leading to disconnection from the initial thought or action. However, this is needed, at times, not to lose the flow in action scenes or similarly intense moments. Even in those, there should be small pauses, or it all becomes a blur and a lot of noise. Nevertheless, Be that as it may, it goes without saying! It may sound as if I am overly harsh on the author and the story, and I am. Still, it is not because I want to be mean or drag the author into the mud, but because I like the story, the world, and the characters created and hope to see the author evolve further in his writing. Nevertheless, be that as it may, cheers from this hobbyist writer and possibly aspiring author it goes without saying, but I'll do so anyway. I wait in intrepidation for more to read!
The Demon Monarch System
Syphiinz
Liked by 2 people
LIKEReplies2
Before I respond, I first want to give you my utmost sincerity for some solid feedback on the outstanding issues I've noticed in my novel. Now, as we speak, I am sparing some additional time to backtrack and rectify any of the issues that you have mentioned. While it may be happening at a slow pace, it will be done nonetheless. As for the introduction of some things, their purpose comes to light further down the line to solidify the plot. But for the fast-paced writing style, I'm currently experimenting with various ways of writing. For now, I tend to shy away from expounding on too much of the actions taking place in fights. In the long run, I'll ultimately come in contact with my desired writing pace. Overall, thank you for bringing these matters to my attention. You were constructive, thus I don't interpret anything you said as harsh. It just the fact of the matter. Nevertheless, enjoy the development of the story!
Thank you for viewing my criticism with an open mind. It fills me with delight that you are looking back and improving on your story! And even if I might feel your pace sometimes is beyond me, it does not mean it is wrong. As long as you find your act of writing, creating, and storytelling to be fun, it will engorge and captivate hearts and readers as it has mine.
Syphiinz:Before I respond, I first want to give you my utmost sincerity for some solid feedback on the outstanding issues I've noticed in my novel. Now, as we speak, I am sparing some additional time to backtrack and rectify any of the issues that you have mentioned. While it may be happening at a slow pace, it will be done nonetheless. As for the introduction of some things, their purpose comes to light further down the line to solidify the plot. But for the fast-paced writing style, I'm currently experimenting with various ways of writing. For now, I tend to shy away from expounding on too much of the actions taking place in fights. In the long run, I'll ultimately come in contact with my desired writing pace. Overall, thank you for bringing these matters to my attention. You were constructive, thus I don't interpret anything you said as harsh. It just the fact of the matter. Nevertheless, enjoy the development of the story!