I can commend the first few paragraphs of this first chapter for it delivers "the show, don't tell" technique in writing. There are areas you need to improve especially in the consistency of use of verb tenses. I only checked minor issues regarding this matter in this chapter. Overall, you have managed to narrate a story of the heroic action of the protagonist in the first chapter.

You forget to capitalize 'the'.

I suggest you include a footnote about this word. What sound does it pertain?

"SOMEBODY HELP MEEEE!"

"Don't mention it. I'm just 'carrying' out my job...."

Using asterisk in conveying or demonstrating emotion, gesture or exclamation is done in informal writing. Unless you have a footnote or you want to censor a word, I suggest you refrain the use of this symbol in your book in this case. Why not use quotation marks instead? Don't forget the exclamation mark at the end of BRAAP and on JSLOSH. Each 'seemingly' onomatopoeic term denotes a loud sound.

...damage that Palkeros had done. Palkeros performed the damage. It should be in active verb as opposed to 'Palkeros had been done', which would question its validity of doing the damage or if the monster finished doing the damage.

I think this book is not for you. You have been reading two chapters for more than ten days. And then you posted this review. This is a slow-burn novel. It will give you literal headache to migraine. LOL That's what you get from a book, written by someone who is into magic. I hope your intention does not include attacking me personally.

It took you more than 10 days to finish this chapter and you even mentioned on your review about not finishing it because of info-dump. Why are you here anyway?

This is very well-written, almost faultless. I have read that this has a promising storyline. But, I would say this has a very impressive storyline. It is very interesting beginning Chapter 3. It has a modern take of mage system with a spy trope. We have a main character with a surprising quality. You need to read it to find out more. It is definitely a worthwhile read.

I agree that this has one of those unsurprising yet also unexpected plot twists.

I understand his emotion. I think he is smarter than I thought with his age.

Thanks for your comment. Yes, I recognize the info dump. If you think they are too irrelevant, then I will decide to omit them.

Thank you for the great review.

Gu Erin a contradicting character. He is surely interesting though. I can't say for certain how the story will develop further. But what I like about is the pacing. One may have to read carefully to be able to understand what Heaven's Mercy is. I am still figuring out what the author is conveying about it.

...redrawing his moral lines once again. Gu Erin is interesting but contradicting. He is protecting the people he cared about even including the ones that might cause him trouble in the future. I might be wrong though so I am anticipating a character development.

"... might hear it."

"... if you're so inclined to listen."

I think it's 'ramrod'.

This is a shameless rating and review of this novel. I thank the reviewers for citing this book as a masterpiece. It's one of my first attempts in creating and developing a fantasy story. So, this has certain attachment to me. I invite any reader to post comments and even suggest better words to use. I have had a few suggestions of them lately. It's been an enjoyable experience to write the story of Sigmund Chua and his journey and mission to the immortal realm. Kind and sincere review is appreciated. Thank you!