webnovel
avatar
1660772895134
JustGoDie13

JustGoDie13

Lv2

I wish life was just playing ARAMs in League of legends.

2022-08-18 JoinedUnited States
30.5h

of reading

90

Read books

Badges

6

Moments

84
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    🤔🤔🤔

    Ch 9 A Battle Begins (For Unrequited Love)
    altalt
    God's Little Helpers
    Fantasy ¡ JustGoDie13
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Replied to JWhite_9988

    Thank you, I really appreciate it. I'll be checking out that chapter :)

    altalt
    God's Little Helpers
    Fantasy ¡ JustGoDie13
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Replied to callele

    Thank you :)

    altalt
    God's Little Helpers
    Fantasy ¡ JustGoDie13
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Posted

    Great start so far, the story is well written and there's no noticeable grammar issues. Descriptions are thorough, and the author's sense of humor is well received so far. While the two MCs are familiar to what you expect from the genre, they have good chemistry and are well fleshed out.

    altalt
    Lahnthean Aria
    Fantasy ¡ Callele Lyvance
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    literally falling in love lol

    Noorh soon found her staring blankly at him, resignedly falling towards her doom. He stretched out his arms to grab her and pulled her tightly against his chest. He then twisted his body so that they could fall to the ground feet-first, and muttered a spell under his breath until their descent slowed down to a halt in mid-air.
    altalt
    Lahnthean Aria
    Fantasy ¡ Callele Lyvance
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Kiran, go stand at the back of the class and press your head against the pillar in shame

    "You're making fun of me, aren't you?!" Kiran snapped, glowering at him.
    altalt
    Lahnthean Aria
    Fantasy ¡ Callele Lyvance
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Replied to JWhite_9988

    Glad to hear it :)

    Ch 1 Down and Losing
    altalt
    God's Little Helpers
    Fantasy ¡ JustGoDie13
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Replied to Hanami574

    Thank you 😊

    altalt
    God's Little Helpers
    Fantasy ¡ JustGoDie13
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Posted

    Great start, I especially enjoyed the intro chapter. I love the author's descriptions and early focus on character's emotions and feelings. Its a smooth world transition as well, with a quick and easy introduction to magic. For the most part, through 5 chapters the story is grammatically sound and free of errors as well. I'm looking forward to Sakuta's next adventures.

    This book has been deleted.
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    RIP king

    This book has been deleted.
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Get him old man!

    This book has been deleted.
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Posted

    The author's story development and sense of humor are both great, and I also enjoyed the frequent action, but the reason I gave less than 5 stars because there are a lot of grammar issues that distract from the good parts. I think if that is cleaned up a bit the writer's fun style can really shine.

    altalt
    The Deal With The Deviless
    Fantasy ¡ BLACK_LIGHT_
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    lol

    White replies "I am just average, it is just that you are stupid."
    altalt
    The Deal With The Deviless
    Fantasy ¡ BLACK_LIGHT_
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Replied to JWhite_9988

    Yes, that sounds about right. I'd just go onto the mobile app and see how the most popular stories have it for example.

    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Posted

    Writing this after 5 chapters, the biggest strength so far is the author's thorough and skillful writing. Descriptions are very vivid and pass the test of what I expect from high fantasy. The characters have strong points of view that feel authentic and not like the author is overwriting their own views onto them. My biggest piece of advice to the author is to break up the paragraphs dramatically. I myself had to learn this lesson, so I speak from experience. Many readers are only going to read your story on mobile, so if you open up the app you'll see how large the blocks of text are as presented right now. It's not ruining the story, but I do feel it will stop some people from reading because of what they expect from this site.

    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Really liked how you used the experience of slavery to characterize through the last few paragraphs

    Ch 5 Gates of Ironclad
    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Please no death flag lol

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Love the ending sentence.

    This paragraph has been deleted.
    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Commented

    Great prologue, I love the imagery and its very neatly told.

    Ch 1 Volume One: The Shadowed King
    altalt
    Mark of the Jackal
    Fantasy ¡ JWhite_9988
    detail
  • JustGoDie13
    JustGoDie131yr
    Posted

    I think the biggest strength of this story so far (I have read up until the paid chapters writing this) is the action. The author writes the action well and it feels visceral. The system and level up elements are familiar territory, but serves as a good vehicle for the action. So far the most intriguing story element to me is the MC's status as "Greater human". I am curious to know what might be beyond that. Looking forward to the tournament arc if I'm ever not poor lol

    altalt
    LEVELLING UP
    Sci-fi ¡ LIGht Pen
    detail