Daedaluxs
of reading
89
Read books
Its a good concept. Incredibly fast paced. The whole writing dynamic is very bland, robotic. Maybe it gets better, but finding someone to PR / edit this to add details and re-structure how things are said would do wonders. Many words simply don't fit, and break the flow. Show, don't tell. EX: Don't just say 'the mansion'. Describe it.