First of all, you have an amazing way with words! I like the way you use them. It is important for a writer to master grammar and vocabulary to paint vivid pictures in the mind of readers. One thing I found that I think needs improvement is the way you flesh out their world. As a reader, I find it very enjoyable to read how the author describes the surroundings of the story. I usually notice some famous writers writing using our five senses. They describe the story by what the character sees, smells, feels, etc. I think this method makes things more realistic, more engaging. But on the bright side, the synopsis of the story was truly interesting! You didn't have the boring introductory part that most new writers unintentionally make. As someone who spends most of her time reading, I have been very, VERY picky with books. And yours is just up to my tastes! Your plot is very unique, too. It piqued my interest since you already dropped bombs in the first part of the story. You've made the readers wonder about how the story would end, or where it would take the main characters. Kudos to you, dear author! Keep up the great work!