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bibiyenini

bibiyenini

Lv3

If you are here to read my mystery/thriller books, be ready to crack your brain open and guess the killer out of my character's investigations.

2020-07-24 JoinedPhilippines
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327
  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini4d
    Posted

    I have given reviews to novels the same as your genre, and I would say they're those underrated best. We actually have a powerful start when it comes to slice-of-life genres, and it is somewhat getting along with the erotic romance. The thing is, I'd like to say a few things that is either a pro and cons to this kind of story. First off, Slice-of-life books found a hard time intriguing the readers due to its slow pace and it's kind of a disadvantage. If we look towards the core, it's actually one of those themes that fall under the niche. Webnovel readers resort to cliche-types, the one who would make them feel aroused or even the slightest bit of sexuality in every FL and ML scene. The reborn genre or troupe is a common thing here, but the market always caters something spicy, and not something comforting. Second, I like your synopsis. It had the glimpse of what the FL and ML is all about. Their characters and what they were before and after the reborn. I have translated a certain book which used this kind of trope and I might say it has the added ingredient to a perfect love triangle existed in a novel. We have a lot to tweak in, but the book is pretty good for a slice-of-life genre for a while. Study the popular books of Webnovel and ideas will just keep on coming. Third, I like your descriptions. I can say that you have been writing for a long time to see the do's and don'ts upon writing the first sentence, and even using other words to keep the reading smooth. We have a lot of writers who still don't know the difference of show and tell, so I explain to them how they should keep up with that narrative. Still, Hansora, you're a great author to keep that difference in line. Fourth, the story is calming yet--I want to be brutally honest--that this kind of genre doesn't go well in Webnovel, unless you'll set a trend. In order to do that, you should be able to set the bar of slice-of-life genres to the next newbies. But that would be hard to do, but I believe in you on reviving the realistic fiction. You are a great author, and I wish you the best in the near future!

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    For Our Happier Path
    Contemporary Romance · hansora
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini5d
    Posted

    I have been giving reviews for a lot of books, and I've been thoroughly honest with it. I have to say a lot of things, but not to the point you have to scrape off everything and start from scratch. First, your title. It's vague. It's capitalized, so the readers will find a hard time finding the book because it isn't in lowercase. Webnovel caters titles with an overview of what the novel is about, and your title gives off a TINY intriguing factor. It is necessary for authors to write the novel with a powerful title at start. Try showing off what you have in store. Think outside the box. What if the title had a 'Vampire' and 'Prophecy' combined in it? What if the title has a Lord or a fantasy element on it that will surely bait the readers to read your book from start to end? Make sure it's decent. Something that the readers will remember for a long time. Second, your synopsis. It needed a lot of re-organization. I'm nothing against with the content, but the structure can be paraphrased. The sentences can be arranged to a general-specific sequence. Try to unravel a wide plot point to the start, and narrow it down to the core. You should set examples from the popular books on how they write their synopsis. Make sure to follow a certain format, or don't be afraid to copy a writing style (don't copy the content, just the style!) Third, the cover. It isn't good looking at the thumbnail. It looked meh on me, Try to find pictures in Pinterest, something that is interesting and eye-catchy. If you are invested to make the novel good and not just farming MGS, make sure you find enough time to pursue having a good cover and content. Fourth, the first chapter is pulling in, but the sentences needed to be reorganized, You used a lot of 'He' in the first sentence. Your always starting the sentence with the subject. Try using another word for it not to be redundant. Redundancy was making the flow rough and the readers might drop it halfway, Best descriptions are the way to the reader's heart. So that's all of the things I've seen through your novel. Best of luck!

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    LOVE IN RUINS : THE PROPHECY
    Fantasy · Rouavf_4698
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini10d
    Posted

    When someone asked me for a review, I'll make it a roasting one. First off, I understand the title, but I think you understand that Webnovel doesn't cater vague titles. I know for a part as a writer you want to write what you have in mind (because I am the same way when I first landed on contracted world) but believe me, those principles would change overtime. Seeing your synopsis and first chapter, it doesn't seem to pull me in. Synopsis isn't catchy, short, and it doesn't excite readers who will read the first part. The title is capitalized, too. I suggest to change it to lowercase letters. Make the title sensible to the theme, too. Make sure you have the right mix up of words for the readers to get intrigued. Second, I really don't get the overview of the story by reading the synopsis. Editors always pay attention to the synopsis because it's the THIRD thing readers will see. Aside from having your title as indefinite, the readers would just scroll through and they won't question what the content is all about. Third, you tell rather than showing details what is the character was doing. You are telling the readers the doctor is stitching the patient's wound and that everyone looked at him. Change it to something like: 'The nurses along the operating room shifted their eyes to me as I stopped from dressing the patient's wound.' Avoid being redundant. Avoid saying the obvious thing as if the readers don't understand it. E.g. "I have woken up from sleep" Eradicate the 'from sleep.' It's obvious he WOKEN up because he's ASLEEP. Last, the punctuation. You keep on forgetting the comma and the period before the start of the next sentence. Just be mindful of those details, because readers might get interrupted with the flow. So that's it. I hope this helps. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    My Best Boy
    Contemporary Romance · EnCy20
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini10d
    Posted

    Okay, since asking reviews is generic today, let me give you an honest one. First, the book cover and title. Actually, Webnovel caters MORE cliche parts on the titles since it intrigued the readers way too much by just reading in the title. We have more popular novels on the same name, that has Tyrant, Alpha or even CEO on it. It's literally what the readers like and we should give it to them. The cover seemed not intriguing to me as it was, or I was just amused with certain covers that has kisses, hugs, cuddles, or even lovers having their quality time in the covers. As for the title, it's vague. Second, I don't have an issue with punctuation and capitalization, but I do have a comment with the synopsis. It lacked some information that the readers want to read for the first time before jumping into the first chapter. Synopsis is the third ingredient to a popular novel. We have to pay attention to the details placed in the front view. Or else, they wouldn't be curious with what is behind the title, cover, and the overall theme of the story. Next, I like the descriptions, but the first chapter might bore me out if I wasn't paying attention to the details. Mostly, some of the passages in popular novels include an introduction of what the character was, or what was her weakness, before jumping into the set conflicts at the beginning. Still, I'm impressed. Maybe a little review to the front page and you're good to go. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    I want a baby system
    Fantasy Romance · Write_D_Words
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini13d
    Posted

    Okay, so when I say honest review, I'll give you a roasting one. First, the title seemed to hit on Idol section, but not the whole title itself. Take note that Webnovel's algorithm catered books with clickbait titles and even the ones who viewed the novel completely. The cover doesn't seem intriguing to me, too, given the title showed a compass of where was the novel headed. Second, the theme. We're talking about a reincarnated or swapping or reborn or replacement of the MC to another one, and I know you wanted to show that to the audience. Think about it this way: what if the title of the book is 'Reborn As A Superstar' or 'I Became A Superstar For No Reason'. The theme may get mixed up with transmigration or even rebirth. Third, catchy synopsis. Your synopsis lack up the spice to fill up the reader's excitement to read your first chapter. It was the THIRD thing that readers will read, so better pay attention to all the intriguing aspect of every bit of your synopsis. Fourth, the first chapter didn't seem to pull in. It was a normal scene we see on Television (or even Korean dramas, because I like them, too) and I don't know if I was the only one knowing where it was headed. Make sure you let the readers jumped in the hook, addicting, and no one will be able to escape from. Last, the overall presentation. It takes time to improve, dear. I know you had a lot of struggle facing in front of the laptop to write, but believe me, this will all just be worth it at the end. Patience and passion is the key. I hope this helps. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    I Am Not Your Idol
    Contemporary Romance · Afismus
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini17d
    Posted

    When I said review, I'd definitely give an honest one. First of all, I'm impressed. The title and the cover deemed to fit right on each other, and the synopsis had been played well. It's not the first time I've seen good books around here, but for sure, this book will be worth a thousand power stones in the later months. Second, the title does seemed fit to Webnovel, but remember that vague and indefinite one --sometimes-- doesn't work out. There's a certain target market that readers would like to enjoy at the very moment they see the cover and the title. Third, the synopsis portrayed well, but some of the unnecessary parts could be scraped off. We don't want to do an information dump regarding every scenes in the novel. It just felt like the trailer you've seen is lile the movie itself shortened for 1 minute. Fourth, I like your first chapter. There are certain words that are highfalutin, but you didn't overdo it. Make sure that you make the paragraphs convincing, compelling, smooth to read, and don't use highfalutin words if it's insignificant on your sentences. So, overall, you're doing a great job. I might as well see you climbing the rankings in the next months! Good luck with your future endeavors!

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    The Admiral’s Daughter and the Pirate King
    Historical Romance · Luna_Primrose
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini19d
    Posted

    So from the get go, I'll give an honest review of what I seen through the book. First of all, I'm impressed. The synopsis is catchy enough for the readers to get draw in. It gives enough overview of the novel and the way it pulled you in and thinking, 'What will happen next?' Second, I like your first chapter. Although I'm not really into werewolves or Alpha's, I'd definitely say you absolutely did a great job on first chapter. I don't see anything wrong with grammar structure or even punctuation. Last, I like the cover and the title. The market of Webnovel will surely cater you with unexpected readers for the next months. Good luck Rizz! You have a bright journey ahead!

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    The Alpha From The Aurelius
    Fantasy Romance · RizzEditions
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini20d
    Posted

    When I say review, I would definitely give an honest one. I'd say 4 things about your novel. First, the genre, theme, title, and cover. It's all at once, because these 4 concepts are related to each other. In the genre, I thought it is placed in Fantasy Romance, but I was surprised it was actually in Historical Romance. I don't think the novel should be placed on Historical Romance. The market of Webnovel should have the precise theme in every novel. I'd say it's better to have it right on Fantasy Romance Section. The cover seemed attractive, but not that admiring enough. The text is a little bit mediocre, and it doesn't contemplate to the colors. The title is a bit vague. Why did I say that? Webnovel markets audience towards the titles who HAVE the BRIEF OVERVIEW of what the novel is. So if this novel is inclined with erotica, vampires, or even cursed people, include it on the title. Second, synopsis. I know you're pulling off an erotica scene right there to catch people, but there is a right thing to do that. It must be that overwritten for me [in my opinion] because you gave so much details with the smut scenes in the synopsis, but not really giving a clue of what the NOVEL is about. Third, capitalization and punctuation. Like I said, in many authors' books I reviewed, it is a big issue here. We're talking about the capitalization in every start of the sentence, or even in the proper nouns. We also have to place comma before the end quotation mark. E.g., "Thank you, Astrid," said Asthon. [This example comprised of the capitalization and the right punctuation in one sentence.] Fourth, I have an issue with the prologue and the first chapter. This is one of the hardest parts of creating a popular novel. When you finally catch the reader's attention with the cover, the title and the synopsis, they'll go to the FIRST chapter they see on your novel. The prologue isn't that enthralling as I thought it was. It is short, the words became redundant, and the sentences could be structured smoothly [maybe if you paraphrase it every once in a while.] Make sure that you show what the character is, the plot point is, and what would happen rather than telling the readers a bombard of information. Do it slowly, and get along with the story. Okay, so that's it. I know you're a very great writer, and good luck with your future endeavors!

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    Cursed Existence:The Internal
    Fantasy Romance · Iam_Moonlight
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini21d
    Posted

    Okay so I'm going to start with an honest review. By all means I'm not swapping to generic ones, but I'll give you with a roasted one. First, the title. You got the hit market of Webnovel with CEO theme and Mafia genre. I already got the point or yours to make it enthralling as it is, but believe me, you need to improve on the title itself. Maybe you can do it as 'He Accidentally Became My Husband' or 'The CEO guarded me, I became his wife!' A lot of titles with vague descriptions are an issue, too. Second, the synopsis. It's clear that there were redundant words that interrupt the readers flow of reading. Remember that the synopsis is the THIRD thing the readers see, so if you fail to catch the readers in the synopsis, then the chapters will go stale. Third, you just have to go with the little tweaks of your first chapter. What I firs observed is your descriptions. Your descriptions were telling the characters what are they doing rather than showing them. Remember to show the readers what they are doing, not telling it as if you're the narrator. They, your characters, should be the one narrating their actions. So all in all, I'd say that you're doing a good job with dealing in the plot at all. You just have to arrange everything so that the readers will fill intrigued in every chapter. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    BLACK KNIGHT: The CEO guards her
    Contemporary Romance · Destiny_9136
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini22d
    Posted

    By all means, this is an honest review once again. I'd repeat the same thing again. This time, I would just say two things. First, you got the hit market, you just have to expound it. You have the title, you have the CEO plotline and the growth of the female lead the way the readers wanted... still, something is lacking. When you're writing a CEO novel, make sure that you are on the right track, or else you're book will just be added to the pile of CEO books who didn't take much up on readers as you expected it to be. Second, the issue of capitalization. Make sure to capitalize what is necessary. E.g., The CEO's Fallen Angel, instead of just putting a lowercase letters on the Fallen and Angel. This is just a guide for you to improve and nothing has been that sure with better writing. Remember, you are doing a great job! Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    The CEO's Fallen Angel
    Fantasy Romance · LadyE101
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini22d
    Posted

    Okay by means of review, I'd definitely say an honest review about this book. I've got 5 things to say about it. First, the title. When you are publishing a book in Webnovel, make sure the title hit the market i.e., be concise of what the novel is about. I get the point of Erica being a demigod or all, but you could have opt to have a more attractive and eye-catcher title. Webnovel market is not really going to move in if it has an indefinite title. Remember, title is the first thing readers see. Second, the cover. In line with the title, you have to also be careful with making your cover more attractive than it was. You shouldn't go to the mediocre and deal with the content later. Webnovel doesn't want surprises at the end, they want it from the start. Third, the synopsis. I understand what you meant in the synopsis, and all of the theme inside the plot, but please refrain from saying the same thing over again. Repeating the same context might bore the readers out of the book and move on to a new one. Fourth, the capitalization, and punctuation. Usage of capitalization and punctuation are the supplemental things to make your execution smooth and wise-read. Readers tend to back out from the chapters if the execution isn't well and there are no sense of writing or neatness in it. Last, the first chapter seemed good but doesn't seemed that good [you know what I mean?]😬 it tells the story of Erica, yes, but it doesn't pull you in. This is where the power of showing more than telling in writing will go. Describe more of what the characters' are acting rather than telling the audience of what they are doing. That's a wrap up for my review. Remember, you are a precious writer. This is just based on my experience and everything I learned while writing every day. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    MY DESTINY; MY PAIN
    Fantasy Romance · LadyE101
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini23d
    Posted

    When I say review, it's actually an honest review of what I read about the plot, theme, synopsis, and even the first 3 chapters. First, I have a problem with the punctuation. It's disturbing to see punctuations not placed to their right places. Added to that is the capitalization of every sentence. E.g. "Thank you," Ashton said. [This sentence comprised of the correct punctuation and capitalization] Second, the synopsis can be written better and well. I understand you wanted to say that the female is not allowed to have a mate, but it can be worded and executed well. For it to be more smoothly readable, be careful with the organization of words. Try to read it again and again. If it sound clear and comprehensible, it's all set. Third, the market of Webnovel doesn't cater vague titles even if it has the catchy word on it i.e., Alpha, CEO, Billionaire or even system. I suggest, if you can do for your future works, to be definite of the title. Be straightforward! Fourth, you can opt to have more detailed and attractive cover to intrigue the readers. In that way, they would make it to the synopsis and the first chapter as well. Last, the first chapter shouldn't start with the information about a pack. You could add this ingredient inside the chapters for it to be executed and informed the readers well. Don't spoon feed readers with information RIGHT at the beginning. Might as well take up a lot of time and effort to have a good writing, but yours is already unique. A little tweak and you're good to go!

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    The Pack's Weirdo : A Mystery to unveil
    Fantasy · Mudita Upreti
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini24d
    Posted

    Giving it an overall 4-star. When I read the synopsis, I felt like it has a similarity with Warm Bodies book. It actually had that effect trailing to every word that literally connected you to every character. This is not my cup of tea, but I enjoyed reading a few of its chapters. It isn't redundant, too, which is also a plus point. Continue to write well and a very great journey awaits you! ✨😎

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    Humans and Zombies
    War&Military · _jessitayylor
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Commented

    See this! I just gifted the story: Ice cola

    Ch 1 My Wife
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    Hide Me, Mister Billionaire!
    Contemporary Romance · Kyrie_Sunbae
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Posted

    I had the same impression as the first novel I reviewed with this author. It's the same tip I'll give to you since it's in first point of view, and to shift it to another story meant how confusing it will be for the readers. Make sure to improve the execution when writing past and present timelines. Good luck on your future endeavors!

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    Will Fate Bring Us Together?
    Contemporary Romance · Rayne_Rue
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Posted

    Upon reading the novel, I'll drop by an honest review of what I notice in the author's execution and writing. First, the synopsis isn't really catchy. Yes, some authors tend to place questions to pique the interest of the readers at first read, but remember, synopsis is the THIRD thing readers will see. First is the cover, and second is the title. If those three correlates with each other, then you'll be able to attract the readers on your first chapter. Second, the first chapter is too quick. Make sure you have spaces in between the words. Don't crowd them in one paragraph. Make sure to take down unnecessary linking words, such as was, were, is and are. To make your writing smooth, you need to reduce those words to limit. The punctuation is an issue here, too. E.g. "Thanks," said Ashton. [Make sure you place comma before the end quotation mark] Third, the chapters felt really long but short on the site because there are so many linking words that rubbed off the sense of a sentence. When writing, make sure to reduce all kinds of link. Redundancy, mostly, is the result of this. Also, make sure to be consistent upon showing than telling. Describe the actions, not telling the actions. Fourth, maybe one of the few common reminders in Webnovel, changing the title. The first thing that comes to mind of the readers whenever they read the title was... "How interesting it is and compelling than other works?" Make sure you're not vague. I'm not saying the title isn't that catchy, but let me tell you this: the market of Webnovel isn't going to grow with the indefinite titles. You have to make sure to expound and in a few words, explain what the story is about. I hope this review will help you! Best of luck on future endeavors!

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    The Mafia Couple
    Contemporary Romance · Rayne_Rue
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Commented

    Oh no

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    The Mafia Couple
    Contemporary Romance · Rayne_Rue
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Commented

    Anyways, this kind of Warm Bodies reference

    Ch 3 Duty Calls I
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    Humans and Zombies
    War&Military · _jessitayylor
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Commented

    impressive psychology

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    Humans and Zombies
    War&Military · _jessitayylor
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  • bibiyenini
    bibiyenini1mth
    Commented

    oh that's his full name?

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    Humans and Zombies
    War&Military · _jessitayylor
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