Why is it always ninja? There are loads on xianxia stories about someone transmigrating in to the body of a prince and cultivating. Doing a kingdom building Naruto fanfic where the main character gets involved in made up national politics, releases modern knowledge and inventions, and hires ninja tutors so he can get strong enough to survive the consequential assassination attempt would make a good story wouldn't it? I've never found one though..

I love the upbeat spin-doctor vibe

Well, worked metal used to be very expensive, armor excessively so. The logic as it is written here is a bit wooly, but armor can be presumed to be a honking great status symbol in primitive times

Ehh~ I think the authors trying to conjure the image of a huge surge of energy splitting the sky like in an anime where it zooms waaay out and you have to see the whole world to see the full effect of an attack

If I were writing this story that ghost would have been 'brought to nirvana' by a thousand passionate thrusts of my sword.

The strongest power manifestation occured when rage and serenity were in balance. What does that even mean though? Pretty sounding nonsense.

stringy -> stringent

Someone in another fanfic totally over analyzed those words and said they were an oblique reference to how if you are a student currently without knowledge (a nitwit) you should not be content with the way things are (blubber), try something new (oddment), then reflect upon what worked and learn from it (tweak).

She rescued Iruka, cast a genjutsu, then was somehow in front of the shiruken to redirect it? Did Sakura learn to teleport in that month of training and you just forgot to mention it?

The author forgot to give his main character any character.

It's pretty rough. If this chapter was revised a few times and some detail was added about the MC's reactions and feelings to dying and being sent to an afterlife bureaucracy was ACTUALLY INCLUDED then it would be a nice premise. The part where the MC gets his golden finger because the frustrated god wants to cause problems for his co-workers in petty revenge is pretty funny. The story is currently too clumsy to be bothered with though.

The story is very rushed in it's pacing but the critical flaw in its telling is that it lacks all of the face-slapping that TDG and LOHP were built around. The MC really needs some problems to solve. The MC just seems to accomplish everything with a hand-wave. Make him suffer or the story will be lackluster. You need to add in worries and misunderstandings from Shen Yue's friends to create Conflict in the MC's relationships. With Shen Yue's decision to randomly go incognito you need to create random a**holes who will try to pick on Shen Yue so the MC can get a good curbstomp in, violent conflict. Conflict and more conflict! What's the point of being a Gary Stu if no one can put up a fight, damn it?!

The feel of the dialogue in the story meshes with the writing as it was in ATG, so that's well done. The problem with the story is that the MC is too laid back for a cultivation novel, and though this makes him more level-headed and likable than Yun Che, Cultivation stories thrive on conflict. The Main character NEEDS to overcome great difficulties! Without random a**holes constantly antagonizing the MC the story isn't compelling unless you throw a lot of Slice of Life magical BS to explain the MC's cultivating process and the problems he needs to solve to progress. This story hand-waves all of the difficulties the MC has when he's cultivating away into the background. As a result the MC of the story is a level-headed OP bad-ass with no enemies that nevertheless conveniently powers up all the time. No conflict. No wow

Stealing powers isn't the problem. Having the main character of the story be nothing more than a training robot, however, is.

Rule: hitting the same spot over and over causes an exponentially increasing ammount of damage. Easy win for a speedster vs a strongman type.

So, is your SI going to kill Hitler or what?

The problem with telekinesis in the Potterverse is that it instantly makes you an end-boss level threat. Even if you don't use it like that Villain from the Heroes tv series a wandless, invisible punch to the nose will win you 99% of any wizarding duels your character ends up in without any challenge at all.

Weren't hunter cards valuable? Irreplaceable and one of a kind? Why did neither of the bodies get searched?

Are chakra beasts actually a thing in Naruto canon? I mean there are the bijuu and the summons but were there wild animals that were insane and amp'ed up by chakra randomly roaming around the hidden villages? I wiki'd it in case it was something introduced in Boruto.. like defeating Kaguya left loose power around which agglomerated into mini bijuu or something, but google has failed me. Or maybe there were chakra beasts the whole time but they lived out in the wilds away from the main settled areas?

Innuendo Bingo! ^_^ If you know what I mean..