SexyYoungMaster
Op protagonists are the best
of reading
1350
Read books
Stop changing from 3rd to 1st person ffs 🤦🏽♂️
I’m crying 😭
That would mean altering the whole story. Butterfly affect
A soldier that doesn’t kill. makes sense
Makes density shifting his weak trait but still names him ghost, the creature known for phasing through walls.
So why would he not stay home? His first thought is to go to school when he has no idea what is going on? For what? To face slap people and get into misunderstandings? I can see where this story is going, mc most likely no intelligence at all this story just pure wish fullfillment.
So is this mc going after toph or no, and think carefully, being 16 is completely taking advantage. Even if you wait till 18, that’s literally grooming. And none of that “it’s different world” bs. That’a just disgusting
So you set the main character as 16, when you already mentioned Toph as your favorite love interest.. I have no interest reading in a pedos work if this is what it is
“I’m going to have a little fun” proceeds to chuck the most common sense out the window almost ruining the whole story
And you made him out to be a member of a surviving race with only 10 or so members. Where is his self preservation? No where. If all members had his perseveration abilities in keeping their secrets hidden from the public, they should’ve just died off tbh.
I take back what I said author, seems like you know that it has been frustrating for us readers loss after loss ig