NitrogenousBeing
My favorite novels on webnovel.com 1 My own novel. 2 Release that witch 3 Lord of the Mysteries 4 In another world with the crafting system 5 Loosing money to be a tycoon
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Dominoes pizza really changed.
By definition this is not a prologue. It’s another preface.
This is a critique with high standards because, after 34 chapters, I still can’t say that it hooked me or even that I’ve enjoyed it. But it's not bad. I want to like it because there are signs the story may be a late bloomer. Grammar: Good minus some commas and high-level stuff Writing Style/Sentance Structure: Dabbler - Beyond amateur level, but still not yet professional level. Immersiveness could be improved through additional colorful descriptions and more concise/direct phrasing of actions. (good for high-speed writing with no editor) Narrative: Okay. It's stiff and standard. There are a couple of minor holes in the logic. The writing style also takes some of the impact away here. Characters: Meh. They are mostly flat, generic, and lack background. There are too few reasons to like the MC. They need more drama and it needs to be believable. Plot: Unoriginal. Many events are generic, dull, and bland. It lacks compelling events, conflicts, and dilemmas. But it's still early and there’s a lot of room to run from here. Prolog: Wow, someone did it right! (a rare feat on this website). Good job! Overall: B- letter grade. Considering it is a web novel and theoretically written at a sprint for a contest, it’s decent. I hope the story improves and blooms to become like a beautiful lotus. Please improve and develop it so I can re-review it with a higher score.
Mixing up land of the dead and free here.
And his parents never noticed…
Also apparently he had no interest in eating them despite wanting so much meat…
Yay for magic and alternative world
Typically building muscle like this at such a young age would stunt growth.
So his medieval house had a book of statistics in it…
Bunnies on Earth are independent at 3 weeks old and their fast growth rate is the main reason they can exist. So needing mother at 2 months doesn’t make much sense…
How does a jungle walk?
What why would animals not go for food in a forest/jungle? (Not sure the narrator knows which he is in.)
Is a predatory animal somehow more edible than a herbivore?
How does he know how to do this?
Wow! This ending feels like my modded Minecraft endgame back in the day. Good job! I have story-ending anxiety from reading too many web novels. So, I was feeling tense about having to read the ending. There were all those unfulfilled prophecies. However, I felt no disappointment at all. It didn't feel like the end either because we'll eventually read about those events in the next book. What a wonderful way to end the novel! I'll be reading the next book, Gamer of the Seas.
So children in this world drink milk with their ears? Very weird.
Review at about chapter 38: So I’m interested in the story, but the writing is killing my desire to continue. There are too many useless meaningless redundant cliché flowery and abstract phrases. Also don’t get me started on the stupid repeating blocks of useless thoughts when the MC panics. A good rule of thumb: any more than three identical repeats is too many. The MCs emotions often aren’t relatable. Plus, the author tends to jump to the reveal a little faster than he should, which I find relatable because he’s trying to fit 20 more reveals behind it. Anyway, the grammar is good and the story has a plan behind it, but please work on the prose. Make sure there’s a reason for flowery words or don’t use them. Keep your sentences simple and direct. Thanks.
I thought for sure he was going to be surprised by an elf on his shelf…
A novel I can give 5/5 because I really enjoy it. It’s suspenseful and full of mystery punctuated by comical, entertaining and ”epic” moments. A little warning for readers: It’s got characters with traits that don’t make complete sense in reality. But what all the readers need to remember is that they are being manipulated by an in-story subpar author. So enjoy those cartoonish over-the-top traits. It’s not unrealistic. It’s manipulation by the ultimate antagonist of the book — if the title where to be believed. This is something of a cop-out, but it does make sense. Remember this and you should be able to suspend your disbelief.
I shouldn’t have tried to read this one based off the title. It’s a genre I like packed with a collection of tropes, ideas and themes that I find annoying after hundreds of similar novels. The author could use an editor as the high release speed leads to errors, but that speed is also probably a big factor in its high ranking. I thought I would enjoy it anyway for a couple chapters. However, several things I detest jumped out all at once and I can’t continue. This means the author is a decent webnovel writer despite his story clashing horribly with my sensibilities. If the title doesn’t give you hives it may be worth a try.