Chapter 18

Tallulah sat in the dining room of the Marigold Shelter. She'd been there most of the morning, waiting for Lily to appear. She'd just about given up hope when Lily walked through the shelter doors. She was shivering and holding a small bottle of vodka. She looked around the dining hall and slowly walked over to the coffee station. She tried pouring a cup but spilled most of it on the floor.

Tallulah got up to help Lily, handing her some paper towels and to clean up the spilled coffee. Lily looked and her and said, "I've got coffee all over me. Fuck it." Her words were slightly slurred.

She turned and headed for the nearest table. Tallulah finished cleaning up the coffee and joined her at the table. Lily hummed softly to herself, taking big swigs of the bottle. When the bottle was empty, she set into the table.

"Barkeep!" she yelled. "Another round for me and my friend here!" She stood up and started to wobble back and forth.

"Lily, why don't you sit down?" Tallulah said.

Lily looked and her and smiled. "You know, you're right. I should sit down." She sat and started humming again.

Tallulah said softly, "Do you want some coffee?"

Lily looked at her. "I just spilled some all over me."

Tallulah smiled and said, "I'll bring you a cup."

She went back to the coffee station and poured a cup of coffee for herself and Lily, then grabbed a handful of cream and sugar packets and carefully walked back to the table. "Here you go, Lily. Coffee."

Lily took the coffee, wrapped her fingers around the cup, and closed her eyes and put the cup to her mouth. She then took a drink and exhaled.

"Lily, I was hoping to see you today," Tallulah said. "I'm writing an article about the shelter and would like to interview you if that's okay."

Lily stared at her. "You've been hanging here a lot lately, haven't ya?" she asked.

Tallulah nodded her head. "I have. I'm writing a story," she said.

"What do you want?" Lily asked. "Why are you always being so nice to me?"

She took a breath and said, "I found your record, Lily. I have it with me."

Lily stared at her. She opened her mouth, but no words came out. Tallulah grabbed her bag, pulled out the record, and handed it to Lily.

Lily slowly took the record and held it up to her face. She then turned it over and read the list of songs.

"My songs," she whispered.

She turned the record back over, gently moved her fingers across the cover, and looked at Tallulah.

Tallulah smiled and said, "I got it from a record dealer. Do you want to listen to it?"

Lily's eyes lit up. "Listen to it?" she echoed.

"Yes, I brought a record player, too," she said. She pulled out the briefcase-looking record player and opened it on the table. She then spun around and found an outlet not far from the table and carefully plugged in the player.

Lily was still holding the record. Tallulah gently took it from her, slid out the record, and handed the jacket back to Lily. She put the record on the player and placed the needle on it. The first note played, and Lily gasped. She turned toward the record player. She was frozen. She didn't move. She just listened.

After several moments, Lily's eyes filled up with tears. She couldn't control herself. She moved closer to the player and listened. She moved back and forth to the music. She didn't even realize she was singing along.

Tallulah watched her. Lily looked completely different. It was as if a fog had lifted from around her.

She's glowing, Tallulah thought.

Anna walked into the dining room and touched Tallulah on the shoulder. Tallulah turned around and put her finger to her lips, then motioned for Anna to follow her. They stepped into a hallway. Tallulah was smiling.

"I found Lily's record! She really made one!"

"What?!"

Tallulah nodded her head excitedly. "She's listening to it right now. That's Lily you're hearing!" Anna turned toward Lily and started walking toward her. She was singing along with her record, standing next to the table, her eyes closed, gently rocking back and forth. It was hard to tell her voice from the recorded voice. Anna walked over to the table, picked up the album jacket cover, looked at both sides, and turned around toward Tallulah, who nodded her head and walked towards her.

"She really made an album?" Anna said.

"Yes," said Tallulah.

They stood together, watching Lily sing and move with her songs. She looked so peaceful, so happy. She continued to sing along until the album ended.

When the record ended, Lily sat down. Her face was wet from tears as she stared at the record player. The album was spinning around on the record player. Tallulah walked over and turned it off.

Lily looked up at her. "This is my record. I recorded this over 20 years ago. It was my first and only record," she said.

"I found it at a record store. I thought you'd like it."

Lily felt clear. The fog in her head was gone. "Owen Katz was my producer, my mentor, and my friend. He was more excited about the record than I was," she said.

Tallulah sat next to her and said, "I…I...read about the studio, Twilight Records…it burned down."

"Yes, they never found out who did it. He didn't even get the insurance money. I know Amanda had something to do with it."

Tallulah took the record and put in back in the jacket cover. "Lily," she said, "I want to do a story on you, but I need your help. I think you sing beautifully. What happened? What happened to you, your career, Owen, and Clyde?"

"It was such a long time ago. A lifetime ago," Lily said. "I don't know you."

"That's true. You don't know me. But I truly want to help you. This record, it's beautiful. You have the most amazing voice. I think others deserve to hear your gift. Now, I don't know why you stopped singing, but with a little digging, I could probably find out. I'm a reporter, Lily." She stopped for a moment. "I don't want to tell your story without you. Whatever happened, it was a long time ago. Maybe this is your time," Tallulah said.

Lily didn't speak. She just stared at the record player and held the album in her lap.

Tallulah looked around the shelter. "Lily, did you know the shelter is having a hard time keeping their doors open?"

Lily looked at her. Tallulah continued.

"My friend Zoe owns a restaurant. She comes in and cooks. You remember Zoe, don't you?" she asked. Lily nodded. "She's having a fundraiser at her restaurant, an open mic." "I think she told me. My memory isn't so good," Lily said.

"I thought you may like to sing for us," Tallulah said.

Lily sighed. "You can never run from your demons, can you?" she asked.

Tallulah looked confused. Lily continued.

"My demons have been chasing me my entire life. I'm done. I don't want to run anymore. I'm tired." She looked toward Tallulah. "This story...what do you want to know?"

Tallulah felt a quiver in her stomach. "I want to know what happened to your career. Why only one record? Where's Owen? And who's Amanda? Why are you here at the shelter? And what would it mean to you if the shelter went away?" she said.

Lily sat for a moment, then gently put the record down on the table. "So many questions. Funny, I have to ask myself some of those same questions. Okay, Tallulah. You want my story? I began singing before I could walk. My grandmother was always singing, and I picked it up from her. She watched me and my brother Clyde. My mother was always working. When she was home, she was sad and mean at the same time."

Tallulah stopped her. "Do you mind if I record you?" she asked.

Lily shrugged her shoulders. Tallulah pulled out a small recorder and set it on the table. She then nodded her head for Lily to continue.

"I sung in the choir. I loved to sing. My grandmother called me Songbird. I would listen to Ella and Billie on the radio. I wanted to be them. I wanted to be a famous singer and travel the world. Clyde, he wanted to be a writer. Like you." Lily smiled at her. "He was always telling stories. He had such a way with words."

"When I turned 16, there was a big party at the park. Not for me, but it was the annual church picnic. I was singing the solo, as I always did when I noticed a white man watching me.

At first, he made me a little nervous, but he had such a kind face. He was smiling at me, clapping to the music. After the song, he came over to me. He said he was a record producer." Lily smiled. "At first my grandmother wasn't having it. She shooed that man away so many times." She started laughing as tears rolled down her face. "My grandmother was the glue in my family. Every family has glue. Who's the glue in your family?" she asked.

Tallulah thought for a moment and said, "My grandmother. She lived with me my entire childhood. She helped me start my dreadlocks and taught me how to use a thesaurus and told me never to let anyone steal my shine. She died about 2 years ago." "Grandmas are glue," Lily said.

"So this white man, this producer, he's Owen Katz, right?"

Lily's face softened, "Yes, Owen was my producer. He paid a lot of money to make the record." "His studio burned down," Tallulah said.

"Yes, it burned down. And the music stopped."

"So, what happened? How do you go from upcoming singer to living in the street?" Tallulah asked.

"I chose the street," said Lily. "Or it chose me; I forget. One day I'm living in a small apartment. I've buried my brother and mother. Amanda had taken everything from me. She made sure I never sung again. She made sure Owen didn't make a dime or sell a record."

"Who's Amanda?" Tallulah asked.

Lily sighed and looked at her record. "Where did you find this?" she asked.

"I went into a record store. They ordered it for me," Tallulah said.

Lily turned over the jacket cover. "I wrote some, a little. I wrote 'Grandma���."

She looked around the shelter. "I like this place. They're good to people," she said. "Lily, who's Amanda?"

Lily laughed. "If I tell you, you won't believe me." "Why wouldn't I believe you?" "Amanda Worthington-Blass," Lily said.

Tallulah paused for a moment. "Amanda Worthington-Blass stopped your career?" she asked. Lily nodded her head, then stood up and put the album on the table. "I don't feel like talking anymore," she said.

Tallulah turned off the recorder. "Wait, Lily, it doesn't make any sense. Why would Amanda Worthington-Blass want to stop you from singing?" Lily lowered her head. "Why do you care?"

Tallulah stood up. "Because I do. Amanda Worthington-Blass was a rich socialite who died a long time ago. She had nothing, at least to my knowledge, to do with the record business. Besides, she's been gone for years. What could she possibly do to you now?"

"Amanda took my life, she took my brother's life, she took my mother's life, and she took Owen's livelihood!" Lily yelled. "She took everything from me!" "Why?" Tallulah said.

Lily was shaking. She sat down and rocked back and forth. Tallulah sat next to her.

"My mama fell in love with a white man. I seen him once or twice, but I didn't know who he was. I knew he was rich. I knew he helped a lot of people in the neighborhood. I knew he gave my mama a job. When I turned 18, I got a certified letter in the mail. I thought it was the papers for the tour Owen was planning. I'd been singing at nightclubs, parties, and dinner houses. We'd just finished recording the album, and Owen was planning to send it to the radio stations."

Tallulah reached over, grabbed her recorder, and turned it on. She showed it to Lily, who nodded her okay, then continued.

"The certified letter was from a lawyer. My father had left something for me and Clyde. Mama didn't get a letter, and we didn't show it to her either. We went to see the lawyer."

"What happened?" Tallulah said.

"Oh, we went into his office. White man. He gave us a copy of a will. He said it was from our father. I remember feeling afraid, but not Clyde. He read the will to us. Cliff Blass was a wealthy man. He was well-known for his business dealings and generosity. He was our father. Cliff Blass was married to Amanda Worthington, but from what I understand, he loved and had been with my mama for years. He died about 5 years before we turned 18."

Tallulah gasped "What? Cliff Blass is your father?" She looked at Lily and said, "You're the half-sister of Sylvia Blass? The fashion magazine mogul?"

Lily nodded her head. "We were kids. Sylvia never knew about me or Clyde, but we knew about her."

Tallulah turned off the recorder. "I'm so sorry, Lily. I can't imagine how you felt when you found out."

"I haven't been able to talk about it for so long. I don't know why I'm talking to you. I need more coffee," she said.

Lily walked over to the coffee station and poured another cup of coffee. She poured in some creamer and slowly stirred it into the coffee. "The only thing I remember is feeling afraid," she said.

She held on to the coffee cup with both hands and sat next to Tallulah. "I was scared. When the man told us about our father and the money, he left us. I was scared. Clyde was happy. He said we deserved that money."

"What did you do?" Tallulah asked.

"At first I didn't do anything. Clyde and Mama got in a terrible argument when Clyde confronted her."

Lily sat motionless, her mind faded to that day. The fight between her brother and mother. The fight that changed everything.

We pulled up to the small blue house. Clyde turned off the jalopy and looked at me. "Mama was wrong. She's been selfish all these years, punishing us for her mistakes," he said. He was angry. I've never seen him so angry. He said, "I'm going in there and tell her we know everything."

He jumped out of the car. I called after him. I begged him to come back, but he wouldn't. He walked in the front door and started screaming for Mama. I waited in the car until I heard her call out, "Land sakes, Clyde! What the devil is wrong with you?"

Then it was quiet. I slowly got out of the car and walked up the steps to the porch. When I opened the screen door, Mama was sitting on the sofa, holding the letter the lawyer gave us. She was crying and shaking her head no.

The tears didn't stop as Clyde was tearing into Mama. "You knew who my daddy was all this time and didn't tell me. You made me think I was a mistake, I was worthless. Every time you looked at me, you saw pain and hurt. Well, now I know who my daddy is. I'm taking his name and his money. I'm leaving today, and if Lily were smart, she'd come with me."

She looked up at him. She looked afraid. "No, Clyde," she said. "You can't do this. You can't take your father's name. What I did was protect you."

But Clyde wouldn't hear any of it. He walked into his bedroom and started packing. Mama looked at me. "Lily, listen to me. I've always loved you and Clyde. What I did was protect you. If she finds out you're Cliff's children…" She trailed off.

"Who, Mama?" I asked. I was still standing in the doorway.

"Amanda," she replied.

Lily's gaze fell to the floor. "When Amanda Worthington found out about the will, the affair, the money, and us, she flew into a rage. Mama was trying to protect us. She blackballed Owen and me from the industry. No tour, no record sales, and Owen's studio burns down. My brother dies in a car accident. My mama loses her job. She'd worked the same job for 15 years, and all of a sudden they have to let her go. No one would hire her. She fell into a deep depression. I tried to be strong. I did. I tried to keep my career going, but no one would work with us. No one. Then Clyde died. That was it for me. My mama went crazy. She just checked out. I tried to live life, I left, got a job, and tried to move forward. One day, it just became too much. So, I left my apartment, my job, and I checked out. Now you know how I got here. You know all my secrets. I also drink a lot, too. It helps keep me numb." Lily stood up. "Tell your friend I'll sing at her open mic. Thank you for bringing me the record."

She walked down the hall and out the door that led to the alley. Tallulah watched her walk out the door, then packed up the record player and put the recorder in her bag. She pulled out her cell phone and called Michael.

"Hey, you at the paper?" she said.

"Yeah, what's up?" he asked.

"I need you to hear something," she said. "I'm on my way."

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