1 I am not your Isekai hero!!

The Greatest New Age Hippy Guru of All Time awakens in his bed. Suddenly he hears the sound of a tractor speeding toward his bedroom window: DEJA VU!! NEVER BEEN IN THIS PLACE BEFORE! HIGHER ON THE *CRASH!!*

And then The Greatest Hippy Guru of All Time died in his bed, crushed by a Eurobeat addicted farmboy, driving his beloved tractor. In his dying breath the Guru cursed the boys name: ''I hate you Sjonnie de Bruijn, I curse you and your bloodline till the last generation!''

With that the cursed adventure of Johnny D. Neilsland began. On the day he was born, all the flowers of his mom's garden withered and died. Johnny's mother was not fazed by this event. She was well aware of the Hippy Guru's death and subsequent curse of her ancient ancestor's bloodline. She just hoped that her demonic offspring would not cause as much damage as his great grandfather did on that fateful day.

TIMESKIP!!

An Johnny was growing up rapidly. The seven year old boy was almost as tall as a grown adult by now. Sadly, his mental development did not keep up with the pace of his height, nor did his other dimensions. He had a hunchback and the brain of a child; Johnny was very retarded. He was inflicted with diabetes after eating all the cakes and sweets at the local bakery, because he thought it would be wasteful not to eat them. Johnny was extremely skinny, he looked like a walking skeleton. His father, Jonald D. Neilsland, was not retarded. And he was very much ashamed by his blighted offspring. He bought a ticket to the other side of the planet. Trying to live out his days in utter shame of Johnny, hoping that he would outlive his abomination of a son.

ANOTHER TIMESKIP

Allas, fate was not kind to Johnny's father. He died, much like the old Guru, after being ran over by a tractor in his new home. While he bled out on the ground, he asked the Spirit of the now deceased Guru to lift the curse. He understood what kind of pain the Guru felt while he was choking on his own blood; his ribs crushed by the metal casing of the tractor. The Guru saw Jonald from his cloud in Hippy Guru Heaven. In his self taught wisdom and grace he allowed Jonald D. De Bruijn to die a free man, no longer bound to the unbearable curse. His son, Johnny D. De Bruijn, however was not that graced. His curse will not be lifted for a very long time.

WHAT?? I was reincarnated as a timeskip?!

When Johnny was old enough to go to highschool, one of his schoolmates was pretty much his polar opposite. We will call this young boy Jerry, for translation purposes. Others will call him Son of the Buckrider, just for shits and giggles. Most, however, called him Sheep. Because he had a big fluffy afro. He was rather tiny, and very violent. At least toward those who wronged him. Those people were mostly bullies. So he was not intensely hated by his schoolmates as Johnny D. was during his highschool years. He was kinda popular, in his own special way.

Now that the true hero of the story was introduced the curse of Johnny D. De Bruijn went full force when a tanker filled with tractor mechanical parts exploded in the harbour of Rotterdam. And the debris landed all around the school more than a hundred miles up north! Nobody of importance died or got injured that fateful day, except Johnny D. Neilsland; he was struck in the face by a metal exhaust pipe, crushing his skull. Sheep was standing next to him when it happened. His short posture and lightning reflexes saved him from the boneshards and pieces of skull jetting around the playground. Sheep was not really traumatised by this event, however. He got a lot of hugs and kisses from the female teachers who felt really sorry for the bloodsoaked survivor. He was very cute so he never lacked attention. He even got permission to shower with the female P.E. teacher and her young female intern; let's just say that most students would have been expelled for such behaviour!

Now that Johnny was dead, the curse was lifted and the Guru came back to life. Having regained the will to live on this planet without the pure evil De Bruijn bloodline ruining his mortal existence. Sheep was well compensated by the Guru's foundation. And he is now the true hero of this story. Because when he went to the United States to meet the Great Guru, his plane got warped in the Bermuda Triangle. He did not die in this mysterious event, no: he got isekai'd to another world. A world that needed him most!

The world of Averoneia!