Chapter 12 - Simon

"Never picked you to be the type to settle down mate," Price sighs, taking a cigarette from my hand and placing it between his lips. 

"Me neither mate, me neither," I say, lighting my own cigarette and taking a deep drag. The nicotine does absolutely nothing to settle my unease. Standing in the cold afternoon breeze, under the awning of one of the supply buildings, both of our shoulders sag. The weight of the mission ahead of us is truly sinking in. 

"The Collins stuff is all sorted out by the way, got filled under KIA and no questions were asked. Just another casualty, just another dead soldier," Price takes a drag, blowing the smoke out into the miserable weather. 

Nodding my head in appreciation, the silence around us is deafening. 

"I need your head in the game for this Simon, I can't have you distracted by pussy, there are too many lives at risk," Price turns to me, pinning me with a desperate plea. 

"I know that and I'm not distracted. You know my job comes first, always has always will," I take another drag. 

"You say that but after this many years together I can see the change in you mate. I'm not saying I don't like it, hell you deserve some fucking happiness but please don't let her distract you while you're out there. It's not just your life at risk," 

"You don't think I don't know that?" I snap, immediately shaking my head and testing a hand on Price's shoulder. 

"That was fucking out of order mate I'm sorry," I say, "I just," words just don't seem to vocalise. 

"You love her?" Price raises a brow, a cheesy smile growing and I can hear the future bullying already. 

"Tell anyone and I'll fucking kill you, there will be no KIA cover up, straight murder," We both laugh. 

My phone vibrates in my pocket as a bunch of text messages come through. 

"Everything ok?" Price asks taking another cigarette and lighting it. 

"Yeah, Riley is on his way back to base, still got a few injuries but overall, he's going to be ok," I say, lighting a second cigarette and taking a long drag. 

"You know, that dog is going to end up liking Sam a lot more than he likes you, she's going to let him sleep in her bed, probably let him sit at the table too," he laughs, punching my arm in jest. 

"I hope so, he's a good dog, he'll keep her safe while I'm gone, and if I don't make it back, make sure he gets to stay with her," I ask, the air suddenly feeling like lead in my lungs. 

Price only nods as we finish out cigarettes in silence. Kicking himself off the wall, Price nods to me in silent comradery as he makes his way back to the main building, ready to organise the team and choppers. 

Heading back to my barracks I collect all of Riley's things and pack them into a cardboard box. Chucking in a pair of my socks hopefully he won't forget me while I'm gone, he's saved my life more times than I can count. That dog truly deserves all the tennis balls and belly rubs in the world. I know Sam will love him, she told me she never had pets growing up because her bastard Dad wouldn't allow her to. Instead she had pet rocks or imaginary friends. I want to give her the best life, a life where she never ever has to shed a tear. 

My walkie talkie crackles to life on the table, my gear laid over the chair and bag packed at the door. 

Gearing up and trudging through the door, I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders.