Chapter 41

I was meant to bring The Residue back with me to Wolf Dominion, but my Kind have a taste for blood too, not just the Genesis.

Blood?

And worse.

"You were coerced? Forced? Persuaded perhaps, to be on the side of your Masters?" there's one girl, with her pouty coloured lips before mine – her eyes are full of fury however. She leads my torture, as I'm tied down to a kitchen table in someone's stone house. This human, Veva, holds my own weapons of choice against me. She's strung the metal string around my arm and caused enormous pressure and bruises to already form – but now she's intent on wrapping it around my neck.

I already told them I had no other choice but to obey. I told them everything.

But apparently, I was missing something.

They weren't looking for truth.

They were looking for justice.

Others in the room use the flame off the small torch to burn my finger tips – while some just enjoy tickling my feet with the tip of the dagger point, because I scream and hyperventilate every time, thinking it'll be any moment they begin to stab me. They keep saying they'll do it, since a hostage doesn't need all her blood.

I've already begged so much for mercy and screamed so much in fear, my throat has gone raw and dead.

I don't care who's side I'm on anymore, I only wish one of two things.

For someone to bust down the door and end this – or to die quickly.

I've probably been on the table twenty minutes, but it feels like a whole month of torture.

There's burst blood vessels in my arms, they've kicked and punched my stomach and I'm sure my organs are dying, and I have one human male, Verren, pulling my hair tightly back, so Veva can wrap the metal string around my neck.

"You know, Veva, a hostage doesn't need two feet, two hands or two eyes – take your pick," Verren talks very calmly to Veva, as if they are comfortable exacting punishment as heavy as this, as a way to seek vengeance against Wolf Dominion.

"She could die if we take out an eye the wrong way," Veva sighs, "Let's take a vote."

"Please, no," I beg on a tiny miniscule whisper and I get choked so hard immediately that I go blue, my vision dots all over, and so I'm silenced again.

"A hand, or a foot?" Veva waits a moment, "Hands up for her hand? Okay. Hands up for a foot? Right," I can't see the hands raised, all I can see is Verren's small nod.

"Wrap that string around her ankle, let's do this right," Verren and Veva don't have second thoughts, this is actually happening, "There's a saw somewhere in the tool kit."

I have no strength but this new advancement to amputation has me thrashing hard – to absolutely no avail. I cannot break the bonds but my mind doesn't care, I have to keep thrashing. I've tried closing my eyes to transcend into Xrat but I am not focused enough and I don't think I ever will be again.

I've never been this traumatised before.

I thought I was tough. I thought I could handle almost anything.

Veva takes the metal string from my neck, back hands my cheek for good measure and then heads down to my leg to prepare for the, for the –

I'm going to be sick.

Verren keeps his eyes on mine, "This is what traitors get," he's told me maybe ten times, but each time it becomes less clear, "You're weak," he raises one thin lip with his emotion, "And the weak don't survive on Genesis. You're lucky Hades wants you breathing. Skye too?" Verren loses his calmness for a moment, and I see a dead look in his hazel eyes, "His family slaughtered all of ours – and that monster keeps you close does he? Will he accept you back maimed, RYDER?!" I close my eyes, my blood pumping so hard in my ears, everything tunes out as every breath becomes a struggle and I feel a strange calm finally flood over me.

It's my final breath of hope.

Won't someone knock down this door and save me?

Xrat.

Raygar.

Skye.

Even Hades.

A stranger?

Anyone.

The cool metal string touches my ankle, while I hear the feet on the ground shuffle closer and words start to fade.

If I pass out it'd be a small mercy – but Verren keeps me awake.

He opens my mouth and shoves a piece of splintering wood between my teeth for me to bite into. He keeps it there while I'm suddenly back to the present, unable to escape the amp–

The teeth of the saw tickle my skin on my ankle.

And no one comes to save me.

****

Time is done.

It's over.

But the pain never recedes.

To cope I've receded inward.

I won't open my eyes, my mouth, nothing.

At some point Hades has come back for me – absolutely furious with the Residue. His fury gets a few heads smacked around, but nothing comforts me anymore.

I swing in and out of consciousness, moving here, moving there, always living in the pain – within or awake.

There is no escape from what they did to me, even when I'm under.

My other foot, though attached, is in crippling pain from how hard I've tensed every ligament.

My whole body is cramping and sore – I've thrown up so much, forgotten how to breathe far too many times that each breath is now manual, and I'm not sure why I'm still alive. Every organ burns.

The shock.

It's always present.

My heart might be beating but my mind is torn apart.

Not one thought is coherent.

"Ryder, how –" a question I don't hear from Hades.

"Will you –?" basic words don't even matter.

Nothing makes sense anymore after what happened.

Perhaps hours pass where hands try peeling my eyelids back, or water dribbles past my uncooperative lips.

And then I hear three words that bring me back, just a smidgen.

Maybe it's just been minutes.

Ryder.

"It's nearly time."

****

I'm awake with eyes open. I'm back. I've never been more aware.

It's not a pleasant awareness.

Hades has given me a stick to lean on, within a wide tunnel leading out of Cracklen.

His followers hold guns all pointed at the company walking forward.

It's the first time I've stood since it happened, and my bandages still bleed heavy.

Hades has completed some sort of negotiation, and he's not wrong – I'm alive.

Less my left foot.

And I was left handed.

Learning to balance on my right side is already a struggle, but after wobbling back and forth, I find a painful but upright position.

Through the shadows I see Wolf Dominion come to complete Hades' trade.

I see one familiar face leading this escort.

Raygar is in the forefront.

He's dressed in his usual prestige and he holds a steadfast eye to Hades, after coolly looking me over and everyone – and I'm not sure he even recognises me.

Raygar is without any words.

"Well. Did you bring her or not?" Hades snarls out, his voice echoing through the warm tunnel. Raygar swipes his robe back and steps to the side, looking at the rock wall as a robbed figure come forward, "Lower your hood," Hades demands.

The robed figure stops next to Raygar, instead of continuing forward.

My eyes focus right on the next victim.

Besodden with makeup all over her face from her tears, Lemeri shows herself.

She jumps into Raygar and embraces him tightly. He also holds her.

"Goodbye Ray," Lemeri gasps in and pulls off Raygar as she turns to Hades, stepping forward… one step… two… her eyes roam until she finally notices me – almost missing me – how different did I look? – probably from my heavy slump, "RYDER!?" Lemeri goes from pink to white in seconds, screeching my name.

My eardrums protest.

I look past her to Raygar, who notices it's me also.

So he missed it the first time.

I guess I looked completely different, covered in burns, bruises, a stick in hand. Foot gone.

As Lemeri shuffles forward, her hands are outreached toward me shaking with her regret.

"Hurry up, stop the tears," Hades snaps at Lemeri, "Move behind me!"

As Lemeri stumbles closer, Hades pulls me out of her way and shoves me hard forward past her.

I lose the stick and I instinctively go to step on my left foot, and I fall right onto my palms, burned and still burning.

I curl immediately into a ball and roll to my side, hissing my pain while Lemeri collapses at Hades feet with the shock of my injuries – and Raygar swiftly comes forward.

"What's so fucking special about your human bone?" Hades asks Raygar as his metallic robe swipes around me as Ray leans down to scoop me right up.

As he hauls me into his chest – my mind protests.

I go insane.

I thrash and I sink my teeth into his bicep, while reaching for the gun closest in his belt.

I pull it loose and shoot the beam right through his middle before I'm dropped.

Raygar just manages to smack the gun from my hand.

"No!" I scream up at him – my vision blotches red as I feel warmth trickle down on my forehead. I didn't notice I had a scab there too but it's broken after swiping against his armour as I fall.

Raygar's side is pierced with the laser, but he manages to stay standing even though he's heavily injured while looking down at me with wide unblinking eyes.

He quickly composes himself.

"GO!" Raygar snarls at Hades, who is watching our interaction close and laughing under his breath.

Lemeri is screaming and being held back by Hades' followers, while I'm trying to launch myself up but I can't with one foot. I don't know how to move. But I try my best to attack Ray.

I'm sure I look terrifying as Raygar pulls back and his own soldiers come forward to apprehend me.

"What's the big deal with her? Kill her, give her some mercy, Raygar, don't you usually thirst over the blood of worms?" Hades almost sounds hopeful that that may be considered for me, "Is Ryder worth more than Solividian, Princess Meri – and what else? Is she a Zyer – did she manage to bond to a beast, is that it? You can't keep it a secret forever," Hades guesses correct, labelling it something I don't even recognise.

The other Wolf Dominion Alphas who come to pick me up, struggle with how hard I thrash again but they do the job, while Raygar stays to face down Hades.

"Ryder lives and dies in Wolf Dominion," Raygar drawls, changing his words, and I scream my rage against them.

"Oh, really, she doesn't sound very loyal now, does she?" Hades whispers.

"She'll live and die in Wolf Dominion," Raygar snarls louder, before composing himself again, "Goodbye. Meri," he goes cold.

Good. He should lose the love of his life.

I watch as a doctor prepares a syringe by me.

The last thing I hear off Lemeri is her scream of her loss, her sadness and the pain of goodbye to the one she loved.

Raygar turns to leave and I see his eyes appear over the shoulders of the Alpha Genesis around me. Both his eyes are red and streaming with tears the very moment his back turns to Hades and the groups leave one another.

My eyes flicker down. Raygar is bleeding heavily from the wound I caused.

The doctor lines up the injection to my arm. I close my eyes as the needle enters and releases its serum.

Numbness starts to flood through me.

I keep my eyes closed, while I listen.

"She's been through extreme torture, Alpha Raygar."

"Her mind… I'm more concerned about Ryder's mind."

"Well, you should be, she is not loyal. She tried to kill you in front of the Shades."

"I know… hurry, come stitch me back together… I regret her injuries… this is my fault…"

"…but she has a heavy debt to pay for your own injuries, Alpha Raygar. She may never be loyal, it's just not in her blood. In her way."

Raygar immediately rebuts, quietly, "…it will be her way."

"You're thinking what I'm thinking. We don't have enough humans Zyers to go ahead with the trails. Only the girl Fyre… and…"

A heavy silence ensues.

"Ryder is the perfect next candidate. If her mind and sense is gone… we'll use the rest of her up. She needs a new foot."

"Vastian will help me design something for her."

Vastian.

His name makes my blood boil.

Was it normal for a Luna to crave to eat her Alpha?

Like Hades ate flesh.

I could wear Vastian's bones and I still wouldn't feel right in the head again.

And Skye.

Just the thought of Skye is enough to make me start screaming again, if I wasn't paralysed, although I feel my face contort.

Betrayed and tossed.

All of them fucked me over.

None of them loved me.

They just wanted to use me.

I was useful.

I was a help. To fucking Wolf D –

I'm finally going under, sinking with the drug and my heavy head.

I may wake again.

But I was never going to be the same again.