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Why Am I A Cat In A World Of Gods?

Not knowing that he and his former owner Hana was killed when they were hit by a car in his own world of earth, Kaede the cat was reborn in a fantasy world called Kalhalla. A world where gods, goddesses, and mythical creatures and beings reside. Wanting to know why he’s there and how to leave, he must survive the fantasy world first. Meeting new people, gaining powerful red and black flame magic, fighting new villains, dealing with new plots, he realizes something isn’t right. “How the hell do I get home? Away from these annoying bastards who wanna pet me every five seconds?”

jxsh116 · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
13 Chs

Royal Bath

Minutes later, Kaede, King Elrond, and Queen Luthien were sitting out in the Royal garden, surrounded by monuments, statues, flowers, and elf knights guarding the area. Kaede was sitting high up on a stool, as the king and queen were sitting in chairs at a table.

Kaede thought, 'This all looks cool…Hana would love this.'

Elrond started, "Apologies for the ritual, young cat. It's not often that we have newcomers with pure intent join our ranks."

"Oh please, your highness, call me Kaede."

'I sounded so sophisticated. This was like that time when Hana's boyfriend met her parents.'

Elrond continued, "Eolande, now known as the shadow queen, has influence many elves into the side of the dark elves, corrupted by dark magic that they vow that will consume Emerald Glades in a darkness of nightmares. And you've had your fair share with their ranks?"

"Yep. They were annoying. Today is my first day, so like I'm kinda new at this…"

Queen Lúthien thought, 'His first day and he's mastered his skills? Doesn't seem right. Let's continue to listen.'

King Elrond, hearing his wife's thoughts, replied in his thoughts, 'It doesn't seem right at all. But yes, let's continue to listen.'

King Elrond and Queen Lúthien, able to telepathically communicate with each other, due to them being married and ruling a kingdom together. On the day of their coronation and wedding, the Starlight council communicated with the Elven Celestial gods to give them that ability, which they think will put them on one accord.

Kaede continued, "Technically, I'm not from here. I'm from a place called Earth, there is no magic but it's more advanced in a lot of ways from here."

Elrond and Luthien replied, "Advanced?"

"Ya know, like buildings, cars, TV, etc."

Elrond said, "In this world, the existence of other realms and worlds and universes exists on all parallel possibilities. The celestial gods are proof of that."

"I just wanna know how I got here. Maybe you can ask your gods something?"

"Connecting with the divine is not an easy task, and it requires effort. And plus, trusting you 100% is not our intentions right now. We need to know if you are really from another world or a puppet of Eolande."

"I promise I don't know who that is. But it's whatever. What do you need me to do?"

"First, a few more questions if you don't mind."

"Ugh. Okay."

"You were killed. How were you risen?"

"Um, a giant lion said I had 9 lives. And each time I come back I'm ten times stronger. Gaining super cool super powers."

"How many times have you died since you've been here?"

"Twice. From a shadow horse and by that soft elf brute."

Queen Luthien said, "So you have the power to cheat death 9 times? Is that normal in your world?"

"Kinda, I mean it's kinda like a myth but cats are extremely durable and tough in my world, and they always land on their feet."

"Do you have battle experience in your own world?"

Kaede thought, 'These two…they're really suspicious of me. But it seems like Elrond is more suspicious of me than Luthien. When are we gonna get to the good stuff?'

Kaede answered, "I've chased a few rats in the street sometimes. Nothing major."

"Rats?"

"Are there no rats here?"

Elrond said, "Oh there is. Which is funny. We need your expertise."

"Oh shit."

"You and a few elven knights will scout out an abandoned infested village here in the Emerald Glades. We just got reports on it being infested with rats that were cursed with the shadow flames. Eulonde's doing."

"Can I go with the elves I met before?"

"Yes. Those are the knights were are referring to. Yalla, Thalion, Caelan, Lirael, and the troublesome Alaric."

One of the eleven knights nearby came up to Luthien and Elrond, whispering, "Thalion did not return with the Green Squad."

Kaede easily heard them, thinking, 'Was it that big leader elf that wanted to hang back? I wonder why he did that. Here's what I got so far: There's some kind of crystal called the Nightshade crystal, Eolande, the big bad villain, is trying to use it to cover the entire elf kingdom in darkness.'

Kaede asked, "Who is Eolande?"

Elrond and Luthien gave Kaede a stern look.

Queen Luthien replied, "Eolande is a dark elf originally from the kingdom of Luminara. She was banished for dabbling in forbidden magic and now seeks revenge by plunging her former home into eternal darkness."

"Dark elves? Like evil elves?"

"Yes. Dark Elves are the ones who were corrupted by the dark and forbidden magic they dabbled with. Anyway, she was an elf born in human land, because her parents were also banished for dark magic practices. She wanted to know exactly where she was from, so her searches led her here. We raised her, and she trained and battle with every rank in Emerald Gates."

Kaede thought, 'HUMANS?! HUMANS ARE HERE?! Wait, wasn't that crazy woman I met first a human? Her hair was covering her ears so I couldn't tell if she was an elf or not. And plus her magic wasn't like the elves light magic, it was dark, dark crystal magic or something..'

Queen Luthien said, "She rose through the ranks quickly, and even aligning herself with a celestial god, reaching the highest rank, Celestial Sovereign."

**This is the highest level of the elves magic cultivation. Celestial Sovereigns are rare individuals who have achieved a perfect harmony with celestial magic and a celestial deity. They have transcended the normal limits of magic, able to perform feats that seem almost miraculous. Their understanding of celestial magic is so profound that they can alter the fundamental principles of their spells, creating entirely new forms of magic.**

King Elrond said, "We don't know how, but once she reached the highest rank, she decided to go crazy. Everyday, her skin would rot and decay, each passing day, it would be more noticeable, and it would spread. Using forbidden magic that doesn't correlate with that certain type of magic, like dark magic to light magic, will curse the one trying to perform the darkness itself, but it'll give power to the bearer if they do it right. Which is what Eulonde had done. Finding her is difficult, and her shadow creatures and pawns are running through the kingdom and towns and villages sharing a glimpse of her. The Nightshade crystal was once a rune that could illuminate anything, cure curses, destroy dark magic itself, but she stole it from the Starlight Councils temple of artifacts, and cursed the crystal itself. A fight broke out between the capital and her, and her pawns, the ones she promised power to, and the stone was lost."

Kaede asked, "Sooo…if there is a celestial god light, is there one for darkness? Just taking a wild guess here."

Elrond and Luthien gasped at what they heard, and they began to use telepathic communication.

Luthien thinks, 'A god of darkness?'

Elrond responds in his mind, 'Even our scholars..or the Starlight council has never thought of that…'

'That's the thing. No one's ever heard of one. Because Eulonde had to manipulate light to bring about darkness, we would've seen it by now, right? She couldn't have manifested the god herself..'

Elrond said to Kaede, "You're pretty observant aren't you?"

"Yeahhh I try to be. Also, you said she began to rot and stuff, did you find anything about that too? Was anyone else rotting?"

"We've tried, a few of the elves have become like that, but they weren't even into dark magic at all."

"So it had to come from another source."

"Precisely…and we are still working on it."

Luthien whispered to Elrond, "We are..?"

"Yes!"

"Very well then. Time for your royal bath. You're bloody."

Kaede gasped, "WAITTT! WAIT! WAIT!!! HOLLLLD UP A MINUTE! Let me give a speech."

Kaede thought, 'I HATE BATHS.'

Everyone looked, and Kaede continued to say, "Well, King and Queen, it is with the utmost respect that I express my reluctance to partake in a royal bath. You see, as a feline of refined taste and impeccable grooming habits, I find solace in my own meticulous self-care. The idea of submerging my delicate fur in water, no matter how regal the setting, simply does not align with my feline sensibilities. I assure you, my fur is already pristine and lustrous, requiring no further attention. I hope you understand my position, as I value my independence and personal hygiene above all else-."

"No, no, no!" Kaede's yowls reverberated through the high archways, his voice a dramatic counterpoint to the royal couple's gentle reassurances. Queen Luthien, her arm draped with a soft towel, attempted to soothe the terrified feline. "Kaede, my dear, it's just a little water."

Kaede's response was immediate and emphatic. "Water! No, no!" His red eyes bulged with panic, his fur fluffed up in distress.

King Elrond, a silver comb in hand, tried his best to reassure Kaede. "Come now, Kaede."

Kaede's yowls only seemed to grow louder. "No, no bath! No water!"

The only one who seemed to be enjoying the spectacle was Yalla. His laughter rang through the chamber, clear and bright, like a stream cascading over rocks. "Oh, how the mighty Kaede trembles before a basin of water!" he chuckled, his eyes sparkling with mirth.

Lirael, the silent one, nodded in sympathy towards Kaede. She extended a hand, offering him a treat. Kaede, torn between his fear of the water and his desire for the treat, hesitated before inching closer.

As Kaede finally succumbed to the lure of the treat and stepped into the basin, his screams echoed louder than ever. "Cold, cold! No like!" His voice filled the room, adding to the cacophony.

Queen Luthien, trying to maintain her composure, cooed at Kaede, her hands working the soap into his fur. "Almost done, my dear Kaede."

King Elrond, looking relieved, started combing Kaede's fur, while Yalla's laughter provided a bizarre backdrop to Kaede's dramatic protestations. "No, no, no more bath!-!"

In the blink of an eye, Kaede dashed away from them, soaking wet. He exclaimed, "You ELVES ARE CRAZY! G-GIVING ME A BATH OUT OF NOWHERE!"

As expected, Elrond, Luthien, Yalla, and Lirael were after him.

The Royal Chambers

As Kaede sprinted into the royal chambers, he leapt onto King Elrond's bed, leaving wet paw prints on the silk sheets.

"Kaede, this isn't a game!" King Elrond called out, chasing after him.

The Armory

Kaede found his way into the armory, hiding behind a row of shields.

"Aha, got you now!" Yalla exclaimed triumphantly. "Or not..." he sighed, as Kaede slipped away.

The Banquet Hall

Kaede dashed across the banquet hall, his wet fur flinging droplets onto the grand table.

"Oh, Kaede!" Queen Luthien exclaimed, trying to scoop him up, only for Kaede to elude her grasp and continue his escapade.

The Wine Cellar

Kaede dashed into the wine cellar, sending a couple of bottles clattering.

"Careful, Kaede!" Yalla warned, narrowly saving a vintage bottle from toppling over.

The Library

Kaede scrambled up a bookshelf in the library, causing a rain of ancient tomes.

"Kaede, those books are centuries old!" King Elrond chided, as he tried to rescue the books.

The Observatory

Kaede ran into the observatory, tangling himself in the strings of the celestial charts.

"Kaede, not the star maps!" Queen Luthien cried, cautiously untangling him.

The Throne Room

Kaede dashed onto the royal throne, his claws scratching the velvet cushion.

"Kaede, off the throne!" King Elrond commanded, but Kaede was already off to the next room.

The Gardens

Kaede disturbed a peaceful tea party in the castle gardens.

"Watch the rose bushes, Mr Cuddly!" Yalla called out, as the feline dashed through the flower beds.

The Kitchen

Kaede stormed into the kitchen, causing a culinary chaos.

"Kaede, away from the stove!" Queen Luthien shouted, pulling him away from a boiling pot.

The Chapel

Kaede sprinted into the chapel, toppling over a candle stand.

"Kaede, be careful!" King Elrond warned, hastily righting the stand.

The Minstrel's Quarters

Kaede hid under the minstrel's lute, letting out a loud yowl when it strummed.

"Mr Cuddly, not the lute!" cried Yalla, retrieving the instrument.

*The Scribe's Study

Kaede jumped onto the scribe's table, knocking over ink pots.

"Kaede, the manuscripts!" Queen Luthien cried, rescuing the parchments from the spilled ink.

The Servants' Quarters

Kaede startled the servants, causing a laundry maid to drop a basket of clean linen.

"Kaede, mind the laundry!" King Elrond admonished, helping the maid pick up the linen.

The Dungeon

Kaede slipped into the dungeon, his echoey yowls startling the castle guards.

"Mr Cuddly, out of the dungeons!" Yalla yelled, chasing him out.

The Gallery

Kaede bounded into the gallery, nearly knocking over a priceless statue.

"Kaede, watch the art!" Queen Luthien warned, steadying the statue.

The Falconry

Kaede dashed through the castle's falconry, causing the birds to screech and flap their wings.

"Kaede, not the falcons!" King Elrond shouted, trying to calm the agitated birds.

The Bathhouse

Kaede ran back to the bathhouse, splashing water everywhere.

"HAHA! Mr Cuddly, stop splashing!" Yalla exclaimed as water got on her.

Kaede reached a hall, and Prince Earendil, and Princess Arwen were standing there, ready to use their magic to stop him.

Earendil said, "Tch! I admit you got us last time, but not this time, rat!"

Arwen added, "…Yes. I'm…kinda tired.." She yawned.

Kaede exclaimed, "I FEEL LIKE TRANSFORMING!"

The siblings screeched in fear, dashing out of Kaede's way, saying in sync, "He's gonna turn into that furball!"

Kaede chuckled, "Haha! Tricked ya!"

(Elven Training grounds)

Alaric stood before the practice dummy, his Emerald Greatsword in hand. "I'm not a troublemaker," he growled, "but neither am I a pushover." He swung his sword, absorbing the dummy's latent energy. With a mighty roar, he released it back at the dummy, causing it to explode into pieces.

"You think I'm weak?" Alaric's voice echoed through the training grounds. He raised his sword, creating an intense gravity field around a dummy. The force was so strong the dummy crumbled under its own weight. "Think again," Alaric sneered. A dummy was set to throw projectiles. Alaric stood firm, the anger in his eyes burning bright. "You underestimate me," he said, as his sword absorbed a projectile's energy and reflected it back, obliterating the dummy.

Underneath the shadowy canopy of an ancient tree, Alaric faced another dummy. "I am not to be trifled with," he growled, and with a swift motion, a gravity field crushed the dummy into a compact cube of straw and fabric. Alaric stood in front of a dummy armed with an enchanted blade. "I am no pushover," he spat, absorbing the blade's energy and releasing a surge that shattered the dummy into splinters.

Alaric stopped, sweating hard, saying, "I'll show them…"

Elves on the side that were trashing had stopped training, and they said to each other:

"You're not going out there to train while Alaric's out there?"

"Hell no, he'll probably kill us all."

"He gets way too serious when when training."

"Didn't he just get into a fight with an elf knight?"

"Yeah. And since he's been a troublemaker all of his life, his family abandoned him awhile ago."

"He's apart of the five main families, one of them being the house of Silvarion."

"Oh, I heard the were strict."

The House of Silvarion

The House of Silvarion traces its lineage back to the earliest days of Eiloria, making them one of the oldest and most respected noble families. They are known for their deep connection to the forest, with many of their members renowned as skilled swordsmen and botanists. The Silvarions have been instrumental in guiding the growth of Eiloria, ensuring that the city remains in harmony with the natural world. Their sigil is a silver tree on a field of green.

The House of Celebros

The Celebros family has a profound association with the celestial magic that defines the elves of the Emerald Glades. Originating from the first elf seers, the House of Celebros has produced many of the most skilled practitioners of celestial magic. They are caretakers of the Spires of the Moon and Stars and are often advisors to the royal family on matters related to magic and the celestial beings. Their sigil is a pair of crossed staves under a starry sky.

The House of Nenharma

The House of Nenharma is known for their affinity with water, their lineage tracing back to the elves who first discovered the healing properties of the Crystal Springs. Many of the greatest healers from the Emerald Glades hail from this noble family. The Nenharma family is tasked with the protection and preservation of the Crystal Springs. Their sigil is a blue wave on a field of white.

The House of Gwethrin

The Gwethrin family is renowned for their martial prowess, particularly their exceptional skills in archery. They trace their origins to the first commanders of the elven forces and have always played a crucial role in the defense of Eiloria. The Gwethrin family oversees the training of new archers and the maintenance of the Archery Grounds. Their sigil is a golden bow and arrow on a field of black.

The House of Lirendor

The House of Lirendor is a family of artists and musicians, their lineage said to have been blessed by the celestial beings with a profound understanding of beauty and harmony. They curate the Melodious Groves and have a significant influence on the cultural and artistic life in Eiloria. Their performances during sacred rituals and ceremonies are integral to the spiritual life of the elves. Their sigil is a silver harp on a field of blue.

As Alaric stood there, he spotted Vettan walking past him.

The nearby elves said:

"That's the High Commander!"

"Vettan!"

"He's so badass…"

"Didn't he lose to a cat?"

Alaric said to Vettan, "Hey, old man! Come fight me!"

"No."

"WHY NOT?!"

"I am on duty. After losing to an adorable feline, I must rehabilitate to myself in the presence of nature."

"You lost..to that damn cat? Pathetic."

"You talk tough, Alaric. But you're slowly getting stronger, still not enough to keep up with me."

"Fight me."

"Damn brat. I'll give you what you want. I need to let off some steam anyway."

As Vettan was about to charge towards him, some elves yelled:

"He's back!"

"Thalion!"

Alaric and Vettan stopped, looking to the right, and seeing wounded Thalion being carried by some elf knights.