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When Finding "Me" Turns into Finding "You"

Aoi, a male college student who is struggling to find his own identity after succumbing to the pressure of people's expectations, was rejected by his long term crush that broke his heart. But little did he know that after this rejection, things would stir up in his life even more as he met the wonderful and mysterious girl named Yukino.

Ritsuuu · Realistic
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72 Chs

Chapter 60: Clair De Lune

As soon as I woke up the next day, my head felt a lot better. The spoils of the other day's alcohol had completely gone out of my system. Maybe not literally but it felt like it. I went to Haruto's place to give back his car that Yukino and I borrowed. Since I was already there, I told him about what happened during the trip in detail. As I expected, he was in disbelief after hearing the story. 

Days passed as I skipped most of my classes, I worked the whole day trying to finish whatever I could. I would get dizzy here and there due to lack of sleep but I never cared. What used to be my time for alcohol became a time for me to work as I would chug a heavy volume of coffee in just one sitting. In simple words, I worked myself to sleep. 

Days passed and came April where cherry blossoms would bloom the brightest. Since today wasn't a very productive one, I decided to take a walk outside just to see some natural light. I've been cooped up in my room for quite some time now only living through cup noodles and coffee so this might be a good breather. 

I took a walk around the neighborhood and wondered when was the last time I got to feel fresh air just like this by walking outside. It's probably a couple of days, maybe even a week but it felt like an eternity. I stopped by the nearby park and sat by the bench.

It was already 5 PM in the afternoon just right before sun down so there's no one playing in the park. I sat there and admired the cherry blossoms for quite some time before thinking about Yukino. 

I bet she'll enjoy this view if she were here. I wonder if she's able to admire these cherry blossoms. She's probably taking pictures of them. That's just like her. 

A day or two after I got back from the trip, I went to her house to try and talk to her. Only uncle greeted me though. Uncle and I talked for quite some time outside explaining to me how Yukino doesn't want to see me. Uncle told me to respect her resolve of doing what she did and I think I understood. Me being so pushy on talking to her might actually disrespect the resolve it took Yukino to break up with me against her will. Keeping that in mind made me able to go this far without seeing her. I made work as a scapegoat for me to keep my mind off of her. 

In a couple of weeks I'll be leaving Japan for Europe to pursue my literature dreams. In just a couple of weeks I'll be living my dream but it doesn't seem to excite me. This is what I wanted but I wondered why I feel nothing whenever it comes to mind. 

The group would usually hangout but whenever I would go, Yukino wouldn't. So to not deprive her of being with them, I would usually reject their offer for her to be able to hangout with them. At this point, all of them already knew about Yukino and I's current status so it shouldn't be a surprise to them. 

Days passed and came the day before my departure for Europe. The night before my departure, I met up with the group.

I arrived at the usual diner where we would always frequent to see them but just as I expected, Yukino wasn't there.

"Come here Aoi!" Said Haruto waving at me. 

"How are you guys?" Asked I.

"We're good, it's been a while. Rather, how are you?" 

"Well, as you might expect, I was busy these past few weeks. I'll be leaving tomorrow after all. Working and arranging my requirements basically ate up all of my time haha." 

"I'm sorry we weren't able to persuade Yukino to come and see you." Said Shin with a sad face.

"Don't worry about it, I more or less expected that to happen." 

"So you really are leaving huh? It feels so unreal." Said Arata as Kaito nodded in agreement. I missed this combo to be honest. It's kind of funny. 

"Yeah, I'll be back so you better arrange a welcome back party okay?" 

"There's no fun if you're already expecting it." Said Hina.

"Shall we go to the main event then?" Said Haruto.

"Let's go!" the group said in unison.

We had something planned for tonight. I am to play the piano for them at the place where Yukino brought me the day Hina rejected me. We arrived at the place and walked through the forest accompanied by a cool breeze that made us shiver every now and then. 

"What in the world is this magical place?" Said Kaito.

"Hehe. Surprised are you?" Said Haruto with a smug face as if to boast he's been here before.

"Who even left this piano here? It almost looks unreal with the moonlight shining on it." Said Shin.

"Play the piano Aoi." Said Haruto.

"What? Aoi can play the piano? Just what in this world can't you do? It's almost unfair, you know?" Said Arata. 

"You'll be surprised when you hear him play. I was when I first heard it." Said Hina. 

I made my way to the piano and sat by the piano bench where Yukino and I would always sit beside each other as I would play the piano for her and she would listen attentively. 

As soon as I sat, all of the memories Yukino and I had in this place were so vividly recalled. Our small conversations, her sleeping figure when I play nocturnes, her head resting on my right shoulder, and the day we started dating each other where we both cried like babies. 

I let out a single tear as I looked up at the moon. Will you hear me play one last clair de lune on this piano before I depart? Said I to the moon as if it would talk back to me. The others were surrounding the piano waiting for me to play. I gathered myself and pressed on the keys.