Chapter 27: New Year

I woke up early and spent some time reading novels by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Upon reading the novel, I realized where Haruto took inspiration in writing his novels. I guess he looks up to him. I wrote a letter greeting my parents for the new year. I wonder when I'll get to see them next? How long has it been, 2 years? 

We met right before noon at the nearest station from our university. We made sure to eat lunch before meeting up to arrive early on our destination. The plan was to visit the shrine and get our fortunes for the upcoming year ahead of us. 

Just what you would expect from me, I was the last one to arrive. Haruto and Shin were holding hands as they said the exact same words in unison.

"Of course you're late Aoi!" 

I laughed it off but I guess they didn't find it funny. 

Yukino was talking with Hina and didn't even look at me as I greeted the group "Happy new year". I guess she still doesn't want to talk to me. 

We were at the train station and Haruto talked to me about the novel. 

"I heard from your editor that you're in a slump lately." 

"Yeah, he told me to take a short break from writing. Just have a lot on my plate at the moment. It'll get better anyway so don't worry." 

"Just remember you can talk to me anytime alright?" 

I nodded and gave him a fist bump.

The group were discussing the plan for the day as Shin presented some restaurants where we could order good soba noodles. It's been a customary in Japan to eat soba noodles during the new year for a healthy and long life. 

A few minutes later, we arrived and made our way through the steep stairway leading to the Shrine. As I expected, the place was crowded. Most of the time, I was walking behind the group as I would notice Hina glancing at me from time to time. She's up front beside Yukino so I wondered what they've been talking about the whole time. At the same time, I wondered how Yukino could put up a cheerful front with others hiding everything. 

Right before entering through the Torii Gate, we did the Purification Rituals at the entrance. Once all of us had finished doing so, we entered and made our way to the shrine. 

We arrived at the main hall and it was time for us to pay our respects and prayers. After they finished, it was my turn. I bowed, offered some coins and rang the bell to let the gods know that I visited. I bowed twice pressing my hands together right in front of my chest, my right hand a tad bit lower than my left. I clapped twice and said my prayers in silence before bowing down one last time to end the ritual. 

We then proceeded to get ourselves Ema which are small wooden plaques where we could write our wishes for the gods to receive. 

Arata asked me out of nowhere what I wished for. What I wished for was for Yukino to live her remaining days as happily as she could and that all of us here would find eternal happiness and love. 

"I don't want to tell you. Don't wanna jinx it." 

Then comes the time where all of us were a bit nervous to do so. It was to get our fortunes for the year. We got our fortunes and decided to open it at the same time. All of them were able to get great blessings while I on the other hand received small blessings. It wasn't too bad considering that a blessing is still a blessing. 

Haruto was bragging and teasing me about how he got better fortune than me. I didn't pay it no mind considering that it wasn't a contest in the first place. 

We walked out of the shrine and made our way to Shin's suggested place where we could eat some soba. They entered the soba place as I decided to get a quick smoke before going in so I faked a phone call and asked them to go in first.

"You're bad at acting, you know?" Said Hina, lighting a cigarette before I did.

"Was it that obvious?" 

The two of us smoked a cigarette without saying a word to each other for a while. Hina finished smoking and was surprised to see me light another one.

"Don't you think that's too much?" Said Hina.

"I haven't had one all day. Spare me this one time will you?" 

"So? What happened with you and Yukino?" 

I was surprised how she knew. I guess her observation capabilities are not to be messed with.

"Had a little fight on Christmas day." 

"So you did confess to her and by observation it didn't go well."

"Are you a psychic Hina?"

"But still how could that be? I'm about 90 percent sure that Yukino likes you too. So what's the deal? Is there a personal reason that's hindering her to accept your feelings? What could that be?" 

"Are you a detective or something? Anyway, what do you mean she likes me?" 

"Just what I just said. It's clear that she likes you. I need not to point out all the details, that's too much of a hassle to explain to someone as dense as you. Just trust me on this one"

Even if this is true, that doesn't change the fact that Yukino won't accept my feelings. I know very well why. She's dying. Considering that she does like me but won't date me must be because she doesn't want me to get hurt once she leaves. 

"I guess you know something Aoi. Anyway, I won't pry in any further." 

I finished smoking and before making our way inside, I asked her to not tell anyone about how I got rejected. 

I sat beside Arata this time and all of them were surprised seeing that this is the first time that Yukino and I haven't sat beside each other on these occasions. We spent the time talking about random stuff and preparing for the upcoming term next week. 

"I'm so not ready to study again." Remarked Kaito as Arata nodded.

"Well, I guess we'll be back to reality starting next week so might as well enjoy our last few days of vacation." Said Hina.

"Have you received your grades yet?" Asked Haruto. "I passed!".

It seems like all of us here passed our final exams. What's surprising is that Hina, along with Arata, Kaito, Yukino, and Shin were the top scorers. I wonder when Haruto and I will get that moment. Probably not anytime soon. 

As we were about to say our goodbye to each other, Shin once again suggested that I take Yukino home. But Yukino declined, saying that her uncle would pick her up. Shin noticed that something was wrong and whispered to me.

"Did you guys fight?"

"Kind of. Don't worry. I'll make things right." 

Yukino looked at me for a while before going back to Haruto.

We went home as we greeted each other "Happy new year." 

The day ended. Yukino and I hadn't talked once during the whole time we visited the temple and not even at the soba place. I tried finding the right timing but that moment never came. I really hope that I can talk to her soon. I want to make things right and tell her how I feel about all this. I miss her, our night walks, our talks, us being together in general. I want her back in my life, even if it's not for a lifetime. I want to be with her as long as time would allow.