She asked me my favourite color!

253 days since we moved to the new city. 130 days since I got transferred to this school. All my life I have struggled in making friends and when I finally got a few people around me who appreciated me, made me feel safe, made me laugh, made me feel normal, made me feel like I was one of them, my parents

decided to move to another city. They never gave a thought to what 707 miles would do to me, how a new school, new house, new people, new environment would affect me. How can they manage it? Don't they feel panicked? Don't they find it difficult? How can they sleep so peacefully? How can they not

think about it all the time, all night, all day, every hour, every second? Does this even matter to them?

Do I even matter to them? Before I could think further, a loud bell rang, interrupting my thoughts, the teacher announced that it was lunch time. I gathered my things that were scattered on my desk. My notebook which was empty, my pencil which was bitten on the ends like my nails, my water bottle which was still full. Hanging the bag on my shoulders, I went out of the class, feeling every pair of eyes

on my back, whispering as I walked by, talking about god-knows-what or may be talking about me? The girl who has not said a word since she joined the school. The girl who does not talk to anyone. What if

they find it rude? Or maybe they think I am arrogant or too proud? But I don't have enough strength to talk to them, to say 'hi, I am new in this school', 'hi I am alone', 'hi, can you be my friend', 'hi I need a friend', 'hi I don't have anyone to talk to'. A tear slipped down my cheek as I thought about how lonely I

am here, how desperate I am. Lost in my thoughts I entered the cafeteria. Suddenly, my head felt so heavy with the burden of my thoughts. I slumped on a chair in the corner of the cafeteria. All the students talking, laughing, screaming, and running around the cafeteria felt too loud for me too handle. I

could not take it anymore, I wanted to scream, I wanted to cry like there is no tomorrow, my brain hurt. Hurt from thinking I could not control my thoughts anymore. I did not realize that there was a girl standing in front of my table. I raised my head and she said, "Hey! Me and my friends are thinking to renovate the cafeteria. This wall color looks so boring, right?" I could not answer her, I just stared at her face, trying to make out why she was talking to me? What is she trying to say? So many thoughts floated in my mind at once, like lava in a volcano rushing to the surface. "Anyways we are taking everyone's

vote on which color should we paint on the walls. What do you think, what is your favourite color?"