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Warhammer 40K: I Don’t Want to Be a Tin Can!

This is a translation- Original Author: Night Tales by a Dim Lamp In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war. The Emperor walks among men, striving to restore the glory of the Imperium. Yet, the fate of humanity has long been toyed with by the malevolent Chaos Gods. In this tumultuous future, there is naught but endless darkness and warfare. That is, until the appearance of a Deathwatch Marine named Hades. As the threads of destiny intertwine, can this outsider change the tragic fate that awaits countless souls? The gods place their bets. Yet, Hades remains oblivious to all of this. At present, he's weeping like a snotling that's had its toe stepped on. "Emperor's mercy! Why am I in the Warhammer universe?!" "And why in Terra's name am I a Deathwatch Marine?!" "Is it too late to bash my head in and respawn?!" A comedic tale where a nerdy, unserious protagonist finds himself in the grimdark Warhammer world, oscillating between moments of sheer terror and bouts of uncontrollable sobbing.

Read_and_Chill · Book&Literature
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Chapter 17: What's the First Thing After a Battle?

"What's the first thing to do after a battle?"

"Lick your wounds," said Hades.

Barbarus, the southern swamps, the Dedro Mountains.

Humming a tune, Hades leisurely browsed the bookshelf of a mid-tier Lord Desil. It was filled with unique Barbarus steam machinery blueprints, experimental records, and ancient Barbarus texts—most of which were related to psychic powers.

"Fortune favors me today," Hades thought, looking at the thick stack of steam machinery blueprints. In fact, compared to most of the minor lords he had encountered, Lord Desil had an impressive collection.

These brutish, cunning xenos mostly relied on their psychic powers to dominate. Few lords actively collected and researched steam-based electronics, focusing instead on essential steam vehicles and poison-resistant equipment.

The lords of Barbarus were more attuned to psychic powers than machinery. Except for the high-ranking Lord Nakrey, who seemed to have mastered everything.

Hades mused about this, but his hands never slowed, continuing to sort through the blueprints. Although he couldn't touch machinery now—doing so would destroy it—he believed that one day he could contain the warp energies beneath his skin.

Then he could touch machinery again!

He truly was a genius. In this Warhammer world, what's the point of life if one can't wield chainswords, blast guns, or meltaguns? None!

Hades revered machinery. A factory could produce a meltagun in a few hours, instantly boosting a soldier's firepower, whereas training a space marine took years.

Technology is power!

Such was the belief of a simple engineer from Earth 2K.

After sorting the blueprints, Hades turned to inspect other instruments in the lab. A venom extraction machine dripped dark purple venom; two interconnected devices, likely related to psychic powers; and a skinning machine with dried human skin hanging from it.

Damn xenos.

After a thorough check, Hades approached the corpse of the xeno lord. Drawing a dagger from his belt, he began to skin it. The xenos of Barbarus had evolved skin that resisted the pervasive poisons. Hades intended to use their skin to craft his own poison-resistant garments.

Mortarion's resistance mainly relied on armor similar to sealed suits. Mortarion would surely disapprove of Hades's methods, but Hades knew what he needed. The armor wouldn't protect against the poison unless it was as advanced as space marine power armor.

But the poisons of Barbarus also carried psychic damage. This revelation shocked Hades. He remembered not sensing the faintly glowing green poison when he first used his warp senses. It was only when he ventured into the mountains that he realized the entire planet was infused with this green psychic energy.

Was Barbarus a cursed planet?

Hades tried not to dwell on it, but he knew he was being watched. Could reducing his thoughts decrease the chances of being noticed? He wasn't sure.

In this grimdark world, there were always unknowns. All he could do was grow stronger and prepare for the worst. That's why he challenged minor lords alone. Staying with the Death Guard and merely following orders wouldn't have made him this powerful.

In this world, weakness was a sin. Even in death, souls could be tormented by higher beings.

After carefully removing a large piece of usable skin, Hades stood up and stored it. He had collected quite a bit, almost enough. Crafting a protective suit for Mortarion would require a lot of material, given the Primarch's size.

Hades sometimes wished he could chastise Mortarion for being so wasteful. But he couldn't afford to offend the Primarch.

After skinning, Hades made another round in the lab. Satisfied, he headed towards the warehouse. The Death Guard, led by Typhon, would clean up the battlefield the next day, collecting the blueprints, instruments, and weapons Hades intentionally left behind.

Every time he left behind so many weapons, it pained him. But he couldn't use them, so it was better to let the Death Guard warriors have them. Even if they weren't fond of him, they were brave souls fighting for humanity's fate.

Today was another successful day of defeating a minor lord.