118 I Don’t… I Know, My Precious
[KAWAI]
"The King knows you're his son, my soul," Kosta said and this time, Tamiko believed him.
Kosta had mentioned it in the past but Tamiko hadn't paid too much attention then, because he figured that Kosta wanted to make him feel better. However, today was different and they both knew it.
Silence.
Complete and utter silence was what Kosta was met with when he said the words that got the young Lycan prince rethinking everything he believed in. For a moment there, Tamiko figured it was all in his mind.
There was just no way that the big bad king was out there with the man who had turned their lives and even worse than he knew who Tamiko truly was. Then again, that could explain a few things that happened at the ball.
Tamiko had wanted to tell the king to tone it down at the ball since it would make it seem like he was the son, but then his father already knew that? What the fuck was even going on here at this point?
"I'm sorry, what?" Tamiko asked as he stared at Kosta. He couldn't have said that, right? There's just no way this was possible, yeah? What about his vengeance? What about everything that had happened?
How the fuck was Tamiko even supposed to explain that? What if his father didn't want him for real this time? What if all his speculations were right and the king was disappointed in him?
Oh, Tamiko was losing his mind.
"Since when?" Tamiko asked even before Kosta could answer his first question. He was in a dilemma and he wasn't sure if they were right or wrong. The lines had gotten a little blurry along the way and if he was being honest. Tamiko was confused.
He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do, even how he was supposed to react to this. He wasn't certain whether the sun would rise again or Kawai would be drowned in sorrows until the end of time.
"You're overthinking, my soul. Your father has known since the first time you stepped into Kawai. The time you came for dinner. He knew it then. That was why he strived so hard to be Toshiro," Kosta said and Tamiko stared at him incredulously.
"Toshiro? You said the man left for a distant land!" Tamiko shrieked.
"Well, technically that still counts as a distant land. The king merged his cyan and human side and are one at the moment. He was worried about you knowing a monster, so he introduced himself as Toshiro," Lost explained earnestly.
The Lycan chief knew this was a little too much for his erasthai to take in all at once, but he couldn't deny the fact that this was relieving. At least he didn't walk on eggshells around the father and son anymore.
"Sweetheart…"
"So, what now… He don't want me or what?" Tamiko asked, his voice betraying his demeanor.
"Sit with me, my soul," Kosta said softly.
Tamiko looked at his Erasthai, the chaos in his mind and the uncertainty on his face making Kosta wonder what else was going on in Tamiko's mind. He hadn't intended to scare the young prince like that, but goddamn, he had managed to flawlessly do it.
"I don't understand a thing about this… All of this. Up until ten minutes ago, I wanted to go home to Grealor, because I didn't think he would want me. And now you say he knew about me, that he has the dipshit Alpha in captivity—" Tamiko rambled.
"Hey… hey look at me, baby. It's all going to be alright, yeah? Trust me, it will be okay," Kosta said as he held Tamiko's hands in his. He knew this wasn't easy and he understood the confusion. Hell, he had been confused in the first few days anyway.
"Okay… I'm just scared. I never grew up with a father. I never knew if one was even possible for me. I have so much I want to tell him as my father, but I'm scared I might push him away," Tamiko said earnestly.
"As long as I'm here, everything will be okay. Remember when I told you I would defend you even if I had to fight the king? Well, that still stands," Kosta laughed, and Tamiko joined in. This was insanity but it was the good kind of insanity.
"I love you,'' Tamiko said as he rested his head in Kosta's lap. His erasthai always knew what to say and when to say it. It was like they were meant to be together. Well, that was a plus seeing as they were bound to be paired by fates, right?
"So, you're still leaving my ass here in Kawai or should I tag along?" Kosta asked after a short silence.
"Grealor is not a good place for you, Kosta. You're the Lycan chief. You hold a title worth more than my entire life," Tamiko teased and Kosta pinched his cheeks softly as if to remind the young prince of who he really was.
"Dusha you could ask for my head and King Zaffuto would simply ask if you want me sliced up, fried or baked," Kosta teased.
"It's a good thing I like you whole, yeah?" Tamiko said slowly, gently rubbing his head on Kosta's crotch, only that this time, he could smell lavender thicker than anything he had ever thought possible. Surely it wasn't all in his head, right?
"Yeah… I think… uh… yeah," Kosta strained out.
"Kosta…"
"My beautiful…"
"Can I kiss you?" Tamiko asked, as he lifted his head from Kosta's crotch and shared at the Lycan chief dead in the eyes, before his eyes shifted to the same crotch he had been resting his head on.
"Of course," Kosta said as he eyed Tamiko's lips, but then it took him a moment before he realized what his Erasthai was thinking.
"Oh… you mean–"
"Can I? I always wanted to have a taste," Tamiko said, his voice so husky and thick with desire and lust.
"But–"
"Just a kiss, I won't ask for more I promise," Tamiko added, as he leaned down and rubbed his nose on the Lycan chief's crotch. This was what they both wanted but at the same time, Tamiko wanted his Erasthai's consent.
He cared about what Kosta felt about this and if the Lycan chief didn't want this, Tamiko wouldn't push, no matter how drunk on desire he was. He wanted Kosta to want him, and freely.
"I need to tell you something, dusha…"
"What is it, Kosta?" Tamiko asked softly as he looked up at Kosta.
"I don't… I can't…"
"It's alright baby, we have an eternity together, right?"
"You don't understand," Kosta said, fidgeting and Tamiko noticed that. He had never thought that the great Lycan chief or even the soulless barbarian would ever fidget right in front of him.
It felt strange and at the same time, it got Tamiko worried. He knew the man to be confident and one who did whatever he wanted. Sure, they always let their guards down around each other but damn, there was something more.
"Are you okay? You don't have to do this, my precious… I understand," Tamiko admitted softly, but Kosta gently lifted Tamiko off his lap, before he got up, and began pacing, something that got his Erasthai even more worried.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't have a…"
"I know," Tamiko said with a soft smile.
"What?"
****
[A/N]
* What does Kosta not have lol... Man's perfect for Tamiko, unless he's a hoe?
