The Goblins
So...those are definitely goblins. They're surprisingly cute to be honest. Feels more like chibi goblins than warhammer goblins...
The three shrimps are staring at me silently from the distance, and I stare back, also silent. And yeah goblins are supposed to be short but these guys are like 2 feet tall! Keep in mind, I'm pretty beefy myself, I weight 265lbs and I'm 6'6.
These goblins are between 2 and 2 and a half feet and look like they weight maybe 70 pounds. That like a medium sized dog.
Hrm...what do I do here? Do I talk? Can I even talk with this fucked up mouth? Not only that but would they understand english? Gah! So complicated...I feel like I could punt them if they turn aggressive. But at the same time in these fantasy situations don't the huge guys always lose because the little guy has higher stats or some crazy skill?
"Kyuhk.." One of the goblins made a low sound and then another and another, is it trying to talk? Are Goblins civilized? Or at least tribal? I'm gonna risk it.
"Hello!" I yelled , trying not to scare them too much. I say that because in my past life...feels weird to say that. But in my last life I would always intimidate people with my Ron Perlman type voice despite being a more like a Ryan Reynolds type in the face. Lucky me right? Well not anymore! Fuckity tooth mouth time.
"KYAH!" The goblins screeched all at once, huddling together, shaking and staring at me. Crap, I may have messed up here...
The Goblins kept shaking until finally I tried to step forward, resulting in the group letting out a savage, ear piercing yell at me and sprinting at my quite fast for such shorties.
Well, combat it is. I kicked the one who got to me first, hoping to put him out of commission so I can fight his little friends.
SPLAT!!!!
Huh? Splat? Dear god...my lower half has become bathed in blood, a huge stain where the goblin was, its practically exploded corpse smashed into a tree trunk a few feet away.
Hey, hey. What was that? I can't even explode a rat by stomping on it so why the hell did he just explode?
His friends seem just as confused as me...err no, they're probably scared considering they stopped dead in their tracks and hell I don't blame them.
Putting aside my terrifying new power, I proceed to punt the stunned two goblins in a fabulous sweeping low kick. I've broken alot of guys legs like that and fucked up many training poles too. However, all I accomplished here was making one goblin and the other skid across the ground with its whole body looking broken as it wheezed and coughed on the ground, too broken to struggle.
Shit man, I'm fucking metal.