chapter 1

chapter 1

So, Have you ever had an electric shock, like when you put a fork to the outlet or a joy buzzer or whatever they're called? Today I had to go through exactly that. I was half asleep when suddenly I heard zzzt and bolted upright with a yelp, because fucking hell that hurt!

*Ahem* Let's start from the beginning shall we? Well, ok not prologue levels of beginning, but still. As we know the last thing I did was to go to bed right? We-he-he-hell, turns out that was the wrong move my friends, because I found myself feeling like… well, I had been hit with a few joy buzzers. Yeah, not fun. Anyway, back to the story :). After I had regained my senses a screen appeared.

[As I was saying… welcome humans to the world of orados, a world of death, torment, and delicious food stuffs, and no, that's not a joke. Bah, fuck it you'll see. We've abducted your pathetic race to be entertainment for us, and no, we aren't some heartless gods or alternate species or aliens - well, ok technically we are a bit heartless but that's besides the point.

The point is, anyone that "dies" won't actually die, unless they were terrible people, then you really will die. Those that aren't terrible people will just be sent to a world specially prepared for you all, and don't worry, all of your pets, children, elderly, and teens are safe. they've been put into stasis so they'll be there for you when you get out. Now, back to the main points of business. We've abducted you all to be entertainment, because frankly even with billions of channels there's nothing on.

Now, whoever wins this won't get immortality, as that's frankly stupid, but you will get a reward (within reason) of your choosing. For now, just survive for the rest of your "lives" and if we wanna spice things up, we will.

No rape, no animal abuse, uhh… oh, right! The gifts… you all filled out a survey about a companion. After this, look into your inventories for them. Oh, don't let your shack get destroyed, we don't allow people to build outside of it due to some… issues with other species. anyway, that should be it. First quest: survive, and no, 626 to 746, I'm not sorry. I tried to wake you up several times, deal with it.] Then it disappeared.

"Ohhhh fuck, no time to panic, and fuck you too floating text box. Let's check what I've got available… status? Inventory? Chat?" They appeared, as you'd expect. There's the usual regional and world channels, which I'm not going to bother with as frankly, people are likely panicking. In my inventory there were three things: a computer chip with a note, an egg with weird black spirals that I could get lost in pretty easily, and a basic spear. For now I left those be, because I have to see what I have around me.

As I opened my door I saw NO MOTHER FUCKING GROUND!!!!!! Immediately my ass is at the back of my cabin having a major panic attack (yes, I'm scared of heights, fucking… fuck you, everyone fears something.) and I lose track of time. FUN! There goes… fuck, gods know how many hours of my technically extended life… anyway, a text box like before pops up after I've finally calmed down.

[Ok, had I known you were afraid of heights I wouldn't have done that, I apologize 647, that won't happen again if I'm the one in the driver's seat. One second while I put you back where you should be.] after I finished reading I feel my floors trembling and then they stop (thank god) "ok… next time you want to fucking scare someone asshole, you fucking ask what they're afraid of, and go with something that WON'T FUCKING GIVE THEM A PANIC ATTACK!" I let out a long breath I didn't realize I was holding to help calm myself down, and read the text box that appeared next

[647, your anger is understandable but please don't shout, there's no beginner protection period]

Naturally I clamped my mouth shut and started to check for threats out of the slats

[Thank you. Anyway, I will take that into account for further use. Good luck, and for the record, thank you for putting actual feeling into your answers, and taking it somewhat seriously, that was a breath of fresh air] then it disappeared again.

"Anytime text box. Now then, time to check out that computer chip." As I reopened my inventory I took out the computer chip with note, and read the note, which said:

"Dear Seth. Thank you for being one of the last people to have answered my quiz, and for putting feeling into your answers. Here's a gift to get you started.

P.S. you install it by pressing it to the back of your dominant hand. Don't worry, if you lose the hand you won't lose the chip ;)"

I just sighed and looked around my shack. (a/n: because I forgot to earlier) My walls were a dull brown with what seemed to be closable slats everywhere, which seemed to serve as both ventilation and windows. It was shaped like a cube, about 9 feet long and wide, and 6 feet tall. It had a creaky floor, a table, chair, and a bed that just seemed uncomfortable. On the bright side I also have an attic, though that's cramped and dark, so I'll be closing that up soon here, and that should be it. After I got a general layout of my new home I put the chip on my right hand and let go. as soon as I did, it turned into strange green energy which merged with me, though for some reason I couldn't move. Naturally I was panicking, as I think anyone would if they couldn't move for long periods of time, but there was nothing I could do but to wait.

A long while later and I'm finally able to move and there's a blob of green energy next to me.

"What the hell?" I muttered incredulously

[greetings user, I am your system, designated to guide you as per his instructions. My goal is to ensure you get used to this world and, if possible, thrive. Do you have any inquiries?] it said in a robotic voice

As you can imagine I'm more than a bit freaked out at the moment, so it takes me a while to process all of this. I mean, who wouldn't be at least scared at the fact that they lost control of themselves besides breathing and blinking for at least a few hours, not to mention a blob of energy appearing next to you? (A/n: no he didn't shit himself) anyway, for now I just said "uhh... not at the moment, thank you," and began to think of what I'd ask it, when I could actually process how it got there at least.